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AK2018, apptech

Latest Threads
Contacting Future Ex
Forum: Contact & Residence Issues, Problems with Child Arrangements
Last Post: AK2018
3 minutes ago
» Replies: 0
» Views: 2
Really bad day..
Forum: Your Stories, Advice to Recently Separated Dads
Last Post: Jim
1 hour ago
» Replies: 18
» Views: 248
Ex is being controlling a...
Forum: Contact & Residence Issues, Problems with Child Arrangements
Last Post: Lee odriscoll
1 hour ago
» Replies: 2
» Views: 31
Ex Wife wants 70/30 split...
Forum: Child Maintenance, Finances etc
Last Post: Tamagoto
2 hours ago
» Replies: 13
» Views: 474
Schools are funny
Forum: Fathers’ Rights, Legal Info, Court Orders
Last Post: LTCDAD
2 hours ago
» Replies: 0
» Views: 9
Mediation outcome
Forum: Your Stories, Advice to Recently Separated Dads
Last Post: Fatcat1980
3 hours ago
» Replies: 7
» Views: 90
Advice Please
Forum: Fathers’ Rights, Legal Info, Court Orders
Last Post: watsa64
3 hours ago
» Replies: 6
» Views: 82
Best online sites for a n...
Forum: New Partners, Relationships
Last Post: Tamagoto
3 hours ago
» Replies: 1
» Views: 48
What finger should I put ...
Forum: Fathers’ Rights, Legal Info, Court Orders
Last Post: Tamagoto
3 hours ago
» Replies: 7
» Views: 105
Travel expenses CSA
Forum: Child Maintenance, Finances etc
Last Post: Tamagoto
3 hours ago
» Replies: 1
» Views: 53

 
  Contacting Future Ex
Posted by: AK2018 - 3 minutes ago - Forum: Contact & Residence Issues, Problems with Child Arrangements - No Replies

Hi,

Both of us we have been in contact via txt messages, we do talk even we live together in same house.
Suddenly she txt to stop contacting her for any reason, and forget her and non-biological son ( did not mentioned my child).

I am just getting worried what kind of plans she has. Is she planing to get emotional abuse case?
Not sure how to contact her if it is a child related issues (it could be anything.. who is taking day off to look after, or who is paying for after school classes...etc). Just don't want to get in a troubles.

Thank you for your help and advice.

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  Schools are funny
Posted by: LTCDAD - 2 hours ago - Forum: Fathers’ Rights, Legal Info, Court Orders - No Replies

Me: can I see information submitted by my child’s mother about my child
School: it’s against our policy to share information about your child with you
Me: “coughs politely” ... send me that policy or I will remove the children from the school and you’ll hear from my lawyer
School: “20 mins later” ... we checked, our mistake, you are correct , come in when you like and see what you want that relates to your child
Me: “under my breath” dicks!

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  Certificate of entitlement to a decree
Posted by: beehive84 - 4 hours ago - Forum: Child Maintenance, Finances etc - No Replies

So received this and it looks like an order will be made for me to pay costs of the petitioner, such costs to be assessed if not agreed. 

Is this just in reference to the court costs which is £550? 
If it is I'm reluctant to bother my solicitor about this as it could end up costing more to fight it anyway.

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  Ex is being controlling and unreasonable and not putting my sons feelings first
Posted by: Lee odriscoll - 5 hours ago - Forum: Contact & Residence Issues, Problems with Child Arrangements - Replies (2)

It's been 3 years since my then fiancé asked me to leave the home we shared along with her daughter 6 yrs and my son 3 yrs old.
We were supposed to get married in 6 months time but within 48 hrs of her breaking up with me all the wedding plans and arrangements were cancelled also a holiday I had booked for us and my best friend and his wife I was told I wasn't welcome to go.
I'm not gonna lie my reaction and my mental state was all over the place I was suffering shock and stress and also became totally crazy I was potrayed by my ex and my so called bf as mad but a pychociatrist said I was suffering shock and grieving the loss of my family. I did some very silly things to try win her back.
But even now 3 yrs later she won't allow me access to my boy without my mum being there and when my mum and dad go on holiday I'm not allowed access there was no. Domestic violence but I had become a cocaine addict but have been to rehab and now in recovery
All I want is time with my son alone and to allow him to sleep at mine we both have new partners and hers has seen my son but mine can't
There is no court orders
Any advice what to do she won't entertain me having him along please help

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  Travel expenses CSA
Posted by: johnbarnes - 7 hours ago - Forum: Child Maintenance, Finances etc - Replies (1)

I'm in need of some advice and would be very grateful if i could receive some.

I pay CSA weekly to my ex partner always on time.  I have to travel over 100 miles each way to get my kids which i do twice a month (28days), so its roughly around 500miles ish every month.

My ex is not willing to meet me halfway which i deemed as unfair, so would CSA take into account Travel expenses?

I have them overnight 4 nights a month and more days over holiday periods, they have taken that into account already.

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Exclamation Unpredictable ex
Posted by: Unknow999 - 10 hours ago - Forum: Fathers’ Rights, Legal Info, Court Orders - Replies (9)

Hi I need advice.
I gave 2 weeks advance notice to my ex that I am going on holiday and I will not be able to take girls in my weekend.
I proposed different time but she refused. Also she said that, she have plans and she is not accepting my holiday.
Honestly everything would be ok apart fact that she is unpredictable.
I expect kids a front of my workplace or house in Friday.
Any advices ? Just in case.


What can I do in this kind of the situation please when she will leave kids a front of my house or workplace one day before my holiday. 
What options I have. 
I feel sorry for myself and kids that I need to consider this kind of the options and ask for advice.

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  Final Order
Posted by: asd1270 - Yesterday, 11:25 PM - Forum: Your Court Results/Outcomes - No Replies

Dear all.
Today after a 15 months of hell. A father , a resident parent, a victim of DV and most of all a victim of the family courts.

As some of you may know I have followed procedures and ensured the welfare and safety of my son. But this was not good enough. Protecting him from harm was put on blind eyes. All the concerns around safeguarding was ignored.
The misleading report from the guardian was so detrimental that there could only be one outcome.
The courts respect and welcome these experts that could do no wrong.

The best part is that the guardian reported if I continue to breach the orders?????? They will seek direction from the court to place the child in mothers care and dad to have weekend contact.

Bare in mind I don't criticise ppl so easily.
When a child has lived with the father since birth and the child is already established stability ,security and a sense of safety then why disrupt it.?
Because Im a father......

The guardian mislead the court by reporting baseless allegations and filing a report full of of factual inaccuracies.full stop. This was the final nail in my coffin.

A 2-2-5-5 pattern recommended by the guardian was spat at by my barrister and rightly so.
Kid would have lived out of his back pack.

The judge hinted a order one week on one week off.
So given that all my concerns were not considered or likely to be considered it was suggested by my barrister to focus in residency .

So cut a bulls up story short.

Final order
The child shall live with father.
Contact with mother with stayed contact. The word stayed put in because the mother stated would help her to secure a 2 bed properly.
One week on and One week off.
One Mid week tea time contact 3-7
Father to share child benefit with mother.. Because mother brought it up it was not fair.
The biggest concern was that mother can take child to a non hague country when there had been previous attempts of abduction x2.

Ordered I give up passport today and mother can travel today.
Holidays shared but remain with the pattern one week on one week off.

So the bottom line is. Regardless what factual evidence u have of significant harm to a child , police logs etc. Common assaults , gbh. It makes no difference.

Your just father. The same rules don't apply to mothers.
Resident father or not. The system will do its up most to place the child with the mother, or make contact more less.

The system screwed me over.
I will have to now ensure I continue to support my son so that he don't become another society reject.

Next step formal complaints,to CAFCASS.

I wish fathers to have a better outcome if you too are Resident parent fighting to prove your ability as a good parent.

Over and out . Time to pick up the pieces and somehow move one.

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  Mediation outcome
Posted by: Rawman68 - Yesterday, 06:40 PM - Forum: Your Stories, Advice to Recently Separated Dads - Replies (7)

Well we have been to mediator and we have no issues with me seeing the children.

The big decision is the house. My wife wants to stay in the house with the children.

I don't want the children to leave the house as it is on a good area.

If we go 50/50 she can't afford to buy me out.

She can afford between 70 /30 and 80/20 which l will get between 30 35 k

Do i accept it. I am not doing this for her sake but for the children..

If we go 50/50 we have to sell the house and lose 10 k in moving plus we haven't taken off the solicitors fees.

Also her mum and dad gave us 10k to buy the house so l feel that they should have that back.

What are people's thoughts

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  Contact Agreement Meeting
Posted by: Chi21965 - Yesterday, 05:23 PM - Forum: Outside Involvement, CAFCASS etc - Replies (2)

Has anyone been to a Contact Centre Intervention?

I have had the Contact Agreement Meeting but don't agree with what's on the form. Can I choose not to sign it?

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  Contact - am i unreasonable? Selfish?
Posted by: Christfr1970 - Yesterday, 01:32 PM - Forum: Contact & Residence Issues, Problems with Child Arrangements - Replies (4)

Hi 

i'm at my wits end with my ex-partner, my daughter's mother, as I feel she is dictating everything when it comes to contact and looking for some help/advice etc.

The current situation is that i have my daughter (8 yrs) on a Wednesday from 5pm and take her to school the following morning.  At the weekend I collect her at 4pm on Saturday (every week) until the Monday and i drop her off at school.

What im asking for:
I feel i have no opportunity for sociable activities over the weekend so i have said i'm happy for wednesdays to remain the same but one saturday i collect her 5pm until the Monday and then the following collect her on the Sunday at 10am until the Monday.  this to repeat alternate weeks.  This would allow me and my partner to have some time together as she lives 30 minutes away and essentially when im collecting my daughter on saturdays at 4pm i'm having to leave at 3.30.    My partner has been getting progressively angry about things and says we deserve a life as well and we have no opportunity to do anything at the weekend.  She has her own two daughters as well, aged 11 and 17.  We have them every Friday so any opportunity to do anything together is the Saturday morning and early afternoon

my ex told me that im being selfish and prioritising my partner over my daughter and this is what i hear everytime i ask for someting.  It's always been an issue if i've asked to change contact at any time.  I always hear "i'll need to check with my mum / dad" and i'll get back to you etc.  Its never a straight yes / no.  It's almost like i need to go 'cap in hand' begging for favours.  its so bloody annoying.  She's also saying she works saturday night so its not possible.

leading up to this relations with my partner have been terrible.  We've been together 5 years and she's always said my ex dictates my life/weekends, i'd have to agree withe her to be honest.  I proposed my intentions of changing contact to my ex and she told me to "fuck off" and slammed door in my face.  Few hrs later i received a lengthy text from her along the lines that if i was to do that she would be contacting CSA and her solicitor as i'd signed a document following our break up that i would take my daughter one day through the week and one day over the weekend.

to describe myself, i live in a high rise, low income, fortunately have a car.  in terms of supports its just me, I dont have anyone that i could say "hey, can you look after my daughter saturday so i can go out?".  

my ex-partner - she lives in an affluent area and has recently bought a restaurant along with her partner.  her supports are her mum/ dad and sister who all live 2 streets away.  she has a number of friends she could ask to look after my daughter if she really needed too.

there you have it, the basics but as im sure many of you already know there are always more issues in the background.   Feedback would be appreciated, thank you Smile

Chris

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