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Posted by: Scott101 - 12-18-2017, 07:12 PM - Forum: Fathers’ Rights, Legal Info, Court Orders - Replies (1)

Hi just wondered if any one can tell me where i stand on taking my son away for the weekend against his primary carers( mother ) will . She verbally agreed this was fine and my sons great grandmother has flown from malta to meet him for the first time - how ever as my ex has found out she can throw a spanner in the works and has decided to ryin these plans by putting the brakes on me having him at all the weekend -
I plan to jus wait outside my sons house
Take him to meet her as originally agreed and return him sunday , where would i stand legally as i am his father and i am on his birth cirtificate - every time she can ruin some thing positive she does im sick it !
Surely if she reported me to the police an they rang me its not classed as kidnap as he is safe with his father ?

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  Moved Out of UK - Ex partner trying to stop me to see my daughter - going court
Posted by: gianlucashia - 12-18-2017, 06:24 PM - Forum: Fathers’ Rights, Legal Info, Court Orders - Replies (2)

Hi all,

I would like some advice here please.
Basically I relocated to Malta cause work and I got a child arrangement for my daughter still in act.
In the existing court order I was able to have 50/50 share care of my daughter and also bring her to holiday without her mum consent.
I informed my ex that I was going to leave UK and due her response I applied in the same week for a Variation of an existing court order, as she doesnt want to allow me to see my daughter for holidays, which it will be held on January 2018.
I asked the school to allow me to pass and say hello to my daughter as the mum (of course)she doesnt want me to see my daughter after the hearing even though Im coming to the UK only for 2 days.
The school told me that cannot allow the meeting without a lawyer or a court order...which it confuse me as there are n restrictions on my existing court order and no safeguarding concerns from both part.
The weird thing is that I was allowed to see my daughter before I was leaving as again the mum found any excuse to dont see her.

I sent the birth certificate (as I share same PR) and court order to the school and they still insist that "they have been advised" in this way, which I asked who advised them as I will refer to court and cafcass.

Could you please give me any advice on this?

Much appreciated your help.


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  Occupation Order info required.
Posted by: andynumpty - 12-18-2017, 06:16 PM - Forum: Fathers’ Rights, Legal Info, Court Orders - Replies (3)

Hi, my ex who still lives in the same house as me has mentioned, after failing to get full custody of our little boy after I had to take her to court for an order, that she now is going to get an occupation order so she can continue to live in the house and I'll have to leave.

We are not married, the house is in my sole name but she has a beneficial interest in it.

Has anybody got advice on how to deal with these, anyone been successful in appealing them?


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  Urgent help needed please
Posted by: ST4N80 - 12-18-2017, 04:54 PM - Forum: Contact & Residence Issues, Problems with Child Arrangements - Replies (2)

Firstly I just wanna say good work on all the support this forum is giving dads out there it literally got me through some very dark times a while back.
My question is this, I have a child contact order which has been in place for the last couple of years. Running alongside the order has been my restraining order which I got serve for criminal damage and harassment when we split. I went through the family court and got the contact I wanted after months of trying and its been running fine for the last 2 years.
During the time of my restraining order ive breached it once because of an email sent and was told that if I do it again I can expect a custodial sentence. Anyway cutting a long story short me and my ex began sleeping together last week which I know was silly but its ended up with her reporting me cause it all turned nasty again. I was arrested yesterday for sending texts and emails to her phone which I am currently on bail for because they don't currently have enough evidence because the phone it was sent from cant be found. How will this affect my current contact with the children? can she stop contact? and what will happen if I get sent to prison in terms of child contact? is breeching restraing order enough of a reason to stop break the current contact order.
Any information would be brilliant and again I applaud you guy for all the good work, thanks in advance Adam.

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  Christmas games
Posted by: NIRich - 12-18-2017, 04:18 PM - Forum: Contact & Residence Issues, Problems with Child Arrangements - Replies (7)

New to the forums, perhaps I need some people who can understand my frustration.

Agreed verbally that the ex would have the 1st week of the Christmas holidays and my three kids would be with me the 2nd week.
I have made plans to go along with this but she now claims that she did not agree to this and she wants the kids on Christmas day and Boxing Day and for me to have the children for the rest of the two week period.

In the past this type of thing has happened a great deal and so I have repeatedly asked that e-mail be used so no confusion can exist, however she refuses point blank to do this and will only make verbal agreements that she later denies and/or changes.

A further problem is that when this happens she tells the children that it is me not sticking to arrangements, putting the blame on me. I don’t wish to cause the children upset or confusion by involving them and wont, but feel that I am being made out as the bad guy in this.

I would also say I would love to have the kids with me as much as possible, however I was made redundant on medical grounds and so am living on a very low income, to the point I rarely use heating when the kids are not with me, I do not drink go out or have any sort of social life all money goes in relation to the kids.

Given that I thought we had arrangements I acted on that assumption and I hate to say this but I cannot afford to have them with me the whole period. I should also point out when we divorced I signed over a large property to my ex, I make more than the required financial contribution for my kids and they would normally stay with me alternate weekends and Wed/Thu each week, despite only having a two bedroom property to live in, the bedrooms made up for the kids while I use the living room as my bedroom.

My ex is fully aware of my situation and I feel her actions are very much being able to put me down and exerting control. I have repeatedly tried to insist that arrangements are made via e mail but she just will not do it.

I feel terrible that I am not able to do more for my children even though I know I am doing all I can, it is just bringing me down so much.

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  My ex is not letting my parents see my children
Posted by: Secret-squirrel100 - 12-18-2017, 09:16 AM - Forum: Fathers’ Rights, Legal Info, Court Orders - Replies (1)

Having recently split up from my ex for almost a year now, things as expected have not been plain sailing and although things have calmed down a little bit recently there is still a lot to sort out which is what I am now coming to...

When I was with my ex I had no family members around me as her family were close by and my family lived in a different part of England so my parents used to visit every so often for a few days at a time which was fine. However, over time my ex started to dislike my parents and I was often put in the middle of all this which was not nice. Then when we split my children stayed with my ex and I got my own place and although I get to see my children fairly regularly, things did break down which resulted in legal action, mediation and an application to the court which has been adjourned a couple of times. 

As my parents do not live nearby and come to visit maybe 2 or 3 times a year, they naturally want to see their Grandchildren and after a recent visit from my parents my ex flatly refused to let my children see them. I even wrote her a nice, but stern letter to her asking if she would reconsider to let my children see my parents for just a couple of hours but all I go back was one of many nasty and spiteful text messages saying that she will never ever let our children see my parents again and they can pass away without seeing them again, which I thought was a diabolical and despicable thing to say. My parents are in their mid 70's and they drive hundreds of miles to see not only myself but my children which my ex won't let them see them. My parents were naturally upset, especially my Mother but I really did not know what else I could do.

In hindsight I shouldn't of told my ex that my parents were visiting and then I could of arranged to have my children with me when my parents arrived, but I didn't want to make things worse again as things have been getting better. That would of only infuriated her once she had found out and then I would be back to square one again which no doubt would involve further costs through my solicitor. I did think about going to their school and pick them up with my parents but I thought that would be a bad idea as I didn't want to cause a scene, especially in front of young children.

I felt so bad that my parents did not get to their Grandchildren this time around, and if they ever will. Surely my ex cannot stop my children from seeing them? My ex did say to me that my children (I have 3 under 9) do not want to see my parents but I think they are too young to understand and I hate to think what poison they have been put in their minds about me and my parents from not only my ex but from her family as well. I would never force my children to do anything that they don't want to do but I think when it comes to seeing Grandparents even it it's for a very short time, that is something we must all do. I just think that my ex was so determined not to let my children see my parents anyway and did not give my children any choice and painted my parents in such a bad light that my children did not have any say in it, which is a real shame and when they are old enough to understand then they can decide but by that time it could be too late.

Does anybody have any suggestions what I can do or is it a matter for the court to decide?

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Posted by: TO2411 - 12-17-2017, 10:52 PM - Forum: Outside Involvement, CAFCASS etc - Replies (4)

Hi, can anyone give some idea of the questions asked by Cafcass in a telephone interview?

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  CMS consultation + arrears
Posted by: Hazy - 12-17-2017, 05:23 PM - Forum: Child Maintenance, Finances etc - No Replies


Feel free to make submissions.

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  Ex has had multiple partners since split. Should I worry?
Posted by: Redington - 12-17-2017, 05:07 PM - Forum: New Partners, Relationships - Replies (1)

Hi all,

A quick question about something that has been bugging me for a while.

My ex and I split up a few months before my child was born. In my opinion, the split was always going to happen as she is possessive, obsessive and frankly untrustworthy.

Now just a few months after giving birth, less than year after we split, she gets into a relationship with a guy I had never met before and they are soon moving in together. He is subjected to a background check as his own ex was making things difficult for him to see his own son, which came back all-clear. That relationship ends after about 18 months.

Almost immediately, she gets into another relationship with someone it seems she has just met. They do not move in together formally yet he is spending a lot of time with my child with me not knowing the first thing about him. That ends after under a year.

With little time passed, the same happens with another man who I know even less about. That relationship has now ended and now she is talking about moving in with a 'friend'.

In all this time, I have travelled twice a month at weekends to see and spend time with my daughter, hopefully making it clear to her that I am her father.

Now, I know about my ex's background and family issues and why she seemingly needs the validation that comes from a relationship, but I can't help but worry about the effect this may have on my child. I worry that this will lead to an unstable environment for her to grow up in, or worse, leave her vulnerable to someone with ulterior motives.

I plan to get a background check done on this next person anyway given they will be living with my child, but I just wan't to know, do you think this is something I need to worry about? This is starting to look like a pattern, which wouldn't bother me if my daughter wasn't in the middle of it.

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  New Member saying Hello.
Posted by: Redington - 12-17-2017, 04:21 PM - Forum: THE LOUNGE - Replies (2)

Hi Everyone,

I am Redington, a new member that has joined today. I separated from the mother of my child shortly before she was born 3 years ago, and I have tried my best to be a part of my daughter's life ever since, regularly visiting her despite living in another city several hours away. I decided to join the forum becuase I felt it would be good to discuss matters in the safe space of an anonymous forum rather than relying solely on the (sometimes overenthusiastic) support of my family, seeking advice from others in my position on what to do and how to get past any difficulties that may arise.

Take Care and I look forward to being part of the forum.

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