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Decree Absolute
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communication issues
Forum: Fathers’ Rights, Legal Info, Court Orders
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Complete mess and don't k...
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Parental Alienation
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Instructed my solicitor f...
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Forum: Child Maintenance, Finances etc
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In the thick of it
Forum: Contact & Residence Issues, Problems with Child Arrangements
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Help please
Forum: Contact & Residence Issues, Problems with Child Arrangements
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Letterbox contact
Forum: Contact & Residence Issues, Problems with Child Arrangements
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  Finding of fact hearing pros and cons?
Posted by: Davids - 05-11-2019, 02:44 PM - Forum: Outside Involvement, CAFCASS etc - Replies (7)

I am self representing and my ex has a solicitor. Her Solicitor sent me a letter asking me to admit to violent and aggressive behaviour as per my exes statement. Cafcass have recommended a finding of fact hearing as I denied the behaviour.
I feel I am being pushed by the solicitor to admit this behaviour. Why would they want to avoid a finding of fact hearing? Would she potentially get in trouble for making false allegations? Or can criminal convictions follow If they support her arguments? As evidence she has voice recordings of us arguing which I knew nothing about and believe she orchestrated! She stayed really calm when I lost my temper which looking back is strange and it paints me in a bad light.

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  Providing copy of court order?
Posted by: Charlie7000 - 05-10-2019, 05:24 PM - Forum: Contact & Residence Issues, Problems with Child Arrangements - Replies (5)

Wondering if anyone else has experience of this.  My order says no-one can be given a copy without court permission.  Son's school are asking for a copy.  Assume I therefore have to get court permission.  Can I do this via the court direct or do I need a solicitor?  Just wondering which is the quickest, easiest option.  eg If I email the court and request permission to give the school a copy, would that be a quick turn around - or would they then want a letter from the school?  Or would it be easier via a Solicitor who can just ring the court and get written approval sent out?  Or would it be as difficult as having to apply for a specific issues order or something?

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  Ex has proposed changing the children's name to something double barrelled - advice?
Posted by: Tamagoto - 05-10-2019, 08:21 AM - Forum: Fathers’ Rights, Legal Info, Court Orders - Replies (8)

Hi gang - basically I'm looking for arguments against their name being changed. She can't do it without my permission, unless she goes to court.

We were married, all 4 of us had the same surname. Since divorce she has changed her name and now she is proposing changing the children's name to "Oldname-Newname"

My instincts are 100% no. But that may just be an emotional response.

What do you think and what are the good arguments against (or, I suppose, for) the change?

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  Disagreement on Consent Order Draft
Posted by: andynumpty - 05-09-2019, 06:42 AM - Forum: Fathers’ Rights, Legal Info, Court Orders - Replies (2)

Hi, can someone me advise on the following situation please.

I was in court yesterday and a consent order was put forward.

What is the situation if I disagree with the draft wording, things that have been missed out or things that I remember afterwards I wanted adding?

Can I ask the Judge to look at the hearing again or just request a final contested hearing?

Thanks Andy

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  Mother's disappeared aboard
Posted by: superdaddy - 05-08-2019, 04:23 PM - Forum: Contact & Residence Issues, Problems with Child Arrangements - Replies (10)

Hi all,

I'm in an awkward situation. Mother and I live 1 hour 15 mins apart and I have a contact order in place as of this year. (every other weekend and I am looking to eventually get back to 50/50 that I once had before some changes). She had asked me to watch them for about a week because she had something important to do, that she wouldn't tell me. She even suggested that the children could miss school instead of me making the trip to drop them and pick them up every morning and evening. I, of course, told her that would be impossible to do right now, so maybe reschedule for a better time.

I've found out today, she has left the kids with a student friend (who has upcoming exams in a couple of days), to a country 7 hours by flight away, for two weeks. I spoke to her and expressed my disappointment that she had not considered this poor friend's situation, only to find out that the friend only thought that the children's mother would be gone only a handful of days. I took them home today (As I get mid-week afterschool visits to take them out and get them a bite to eat) and I am now not sure what to do. I will make to 3+ hour journey, 3 hours by car that is, to their school when I can, but I'm not sure whom to speak to about this. What should I say to the school on the days they can't attend?

Thanks for all your support.

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  Back in court tomorrow morning!
Posted by: andynumpty - 05-07-2019, 07:45 PM - Forum: Your Court Results/Outcomes - Replies (22)

Oh well, back in court tomorrow morning!

Start of my application to vary/define existing CAO and ex's application against me for a non-mol and occupation order.

I'll let you know what happens.

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  Help needed
Posted by: Larri002 - 05-07-2019, 03:13 PM - Forum: Your Court Results/Outcomes - No Replies

Hi everyone, it's been a wee while since I've last posted and let's just say things have not got any better, far from it. I have applied to court again to attempt to get a change of residence for my two boys 8 and 6. My oldest son has not been in a classroom for nearly a year now due to his behaviour which is VERY extreme, most recently he threatened to stab a teacher, and only two weeks ago threatened to stab me with a hardened piece of plastic, I know it was plastic but it's still very concerning. My ex has had him diagnosed over Skype by what I call an internet doctor who said he had PANDAS which if you don't know is swelling on the brain...apparently, I personally don't believe it exists and neither do most of the people I have spoken to on the NHS. My ex is clutching at straws as I think she wants any diagnosis to be a reason for his behaviour which to me is as a result of Anger management and could have been addressed months and months ago when I highlighted this. Much to my disgust she has sought private doctors and failed to tell them I existed and her partner identified themselves as being my sons parent, also she has dropped my name from his records which I have two letters from separate doctors as proof. I believe my ex is completely failing our oldest son and a change of residence would prevent him from either being permanently excluded from school or worse, ending up in a young offenders institution, that might seem harsh but he has already jumped on a childs head and is now threatening to stab people, myself included.
I have just received a letter from my ex of what appears to be sent to the courts requesting that because this is the fifth consecutive year that I have applied to court(all with good reason might I add and being out of pocket for it) she has requested for the hearing to be consolidated and heard by a district judge, can anyone say what this means please? And also I applied to the court with my concerns as to the over medication of our son and the failings of her regarding his medical needs. Any advice would be most appreciated. And only last night my ex called my wife which my wife recorded, she was saying how I was going to get ripped apart and I've lied about the DV, and that I could lose my job etc.

Thank you in advance ?

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Posted by: Toddy - 05-04-2019, 07:43 AM - Forum: Child Maintenance, Finances etc - Replies (3)

It has come to light that the ex ran up debt of over £10k in credit cards and loans during the marriage.

I had no knowledge of them and they are all in her name.

She’s claiming they were to cover bills and maternity leave (they weren’t) and wants the values taken off any lump sum I may be entitled to.

She’s a high earner and is continuing to increase her debts, although she can pay them off easily enough. It looks like she’s trying to reduce her borrowing capacity.

What’s the likelihood of me being made to take responsibility for the debts that were present when we separated and I had no knowledge of? Would the courts clock on to her running up debt to reduce her borrowing capacity?

Thanks in advance for your advice.

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  Finical issue - proceeds from house sale
Posted by: Astroman - 05-03-2019, 12:13 PM - Forum: Child Maintenance, Finances etc - Replies (7)

Hi all,

Following the breakdown of our relationship our property was sold around two weeks ago with around £13k equity remaining "in the pot". EX instructed solicitor dealing with sale proceeds not to divide the money because in essence she wants a higher percentage of the pot because she invested a substantial amount more than I did. Prior to us buying the house as far as I was concerned when went in as equals (nothing was drawn up to say she got x amount out if we sold it or split up) so we exit as equals, aside from that I left a decent amount of assets in the property which she still insists I didn't. As far as I'm concerned the pot should be split equally as stated as we are joint tenants on the property and we were not married. I had a bit of advice on this and basically I was told it would cost more to resolve this via courts than what my share (6.5k) would be. Solicitor holding onto the money is saying unless we get an agreement the money isn't to be released. I can't see I'm in a hurry to sort it out but obviously at some point it will have to be, ex is unreasonable and offered me £3k, obviously I rejected this as I need to try and set up a new home for me and my son when he's with me. 

Any advice where to go with this? I can only see court as the only option but I don't want this costing me a fortune in the process because she won't honour the equal split. Most people are telling me to just wait it out but that could obviously drag on for years/months.

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  Anything I can do about this?
Posted by: Gra76 - 05-03-2019, 07:22 AM - Forum: Your Stories, Advice to Recently Separated Dads - Replies (4)

Think I know the answer to this, but my STBX spends half her life going behind my back talking to my friends and family trying to cause problems and turn them against me. For instance, she calls my sister at least once a week to badmouth me and it's working unfortunately as my sister has really started to turn against me recently. Same with my mum. Now she's doing it with my friends.

Can I do anything about this other than asking her to stop? She'll say they're her extended family and her friends too, and that's fine, but it's the badmouthing me part that's the problem. She just won't give up and it's really starting to get on my nerves now.

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