Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Custody Following Terminal Illness
#1
Hello Everyone,

I seperated from my ex partner (never married) some 10/11 years ago and we have a 12 year old between us who I have contact with very regulalry, in fact comes to me every weekend.
She has since married, but has been diagnsed with a terminal illness.
Could she specify in a will that she would like the child to stay with her new partner, or would that carry no weight considering that a biological parent is still around?
I have a sneaky suspicion that this might present itself!

If anyone has experience of this, I'd be greatful for your advice!!

Many thanks
Reply
#2
Sorry to hear your current situation.

Its a great question and i don't know the answer but might depend on a few things:

What is your current relationship status with the kid? See him every other weekend or haven't seen in in 11 years? - you say you in regular contact
Do you have Parental Responsibility?
How long as he been living within his alternative family i.e. with her new partner - maybe this doesn't matter?
Any other kids in that family or your new family?
Are you set up to take him - new partner? House? stable job?
As he's 12 his desires and wishes would come into it

That's the sort of questions i think would be asked... maybe some of them don't matter.

My gut feeling is as you are super involved dad... its over to you...very few questions asked authorities etc ... cant see it any other way

Hope others chip in
Reply
#3
(05-10-2017, 11:19 AM)LTCDAD Wrote: Sorry to hear your current situation.

Its a great question and i don't know the answer but might depend on a few things:

What is your current relationship status with the kid? See him every other weekend or haven't seen in in 11 years? - you say you in regular contact
Do you have Parental Responsibility?
How long as he been living within his alternative family i.e. with her new partner - maybe this doesn't matter?
Any other kids in that family or your new family?
Are you set up to take him - new partner? House? stable job?
As he's 12 his desires and wishes would come into it

That's the sort of questions i think would be asked... maybe some of them don't matter.

My gut feeling is as you are super involved dad... its over to you...very few questions asked authorities etc ...  cant see it any other way

Hope others chip in
Hi LTCDAD,
Thanks for your response.

I've been very much involved throughout the whole life of my daughter, although there are no legal documents, I'm assuming that I have joint parental responsibility with the mother?
I'm absolutely geared up to have full custody - if I thought I would've won I would have gone for it years ago!
I have a really stable job and good home with a partner, so hopefully that will all count.
Obviously I'm going to seek legal advice should there be any resistance, but I thought I would guage opinion first!
Reply
#4
Are you on the Birth Certificate or were you married when your daughter was born?

Both of these would give you PR.
The opinions here are not that of Separated Dads, but merely a loving father who has been through the process and has come out the other side.
Reply
#5
(05-10-2017, 01:11 PM)invisibleintellectual Wrote: Are you on the Birth Certificate or were you married when your daughter was born?

Both of these would give you PR.

Hiya, we were never married, but I am on the Birth Certificate.

Thanks guys!
Reply
#6
OK so you have PR Smile
The opinions here are not that of Separated Dads, but merely a loving father who has been through the process and has come out the other side.
Reply
#7
(05-10-2017, 02:04 PM)invisibleintellectual Wrote: OK so you have PR Smile

Great!!!  Big Grin
So I get automatic custody then?
Reply
#8
It is a minefield this one as I was asking questions about this due to being in a similar situation but slightly reversed. What I know is:
 
If you have PR then you will likely get custody, the only thing that can change this is if:
 
  • The other guy adopts your daughter before her mum passes away, but that would need your consent so wont happen.
  • The other guy asks to also have PR over your daughter, now this again can only happen with your consent so wont happen, but even if it did it doesn’t guarantee him custody over her, it just gives him a stronger position if it went to court.
  • A challenge in court regarding custody based off a statement made in the mums will on who she wishes to be the parent of your daughter. However the fact you are the biological father and have regular access means his chances would be very slim indeed.
 
Hope that helps, but I still recommend getting your affairs in order by getting legal clarification so your prepared when it happens, as well as looking into grief services that might be able to help your daughter come to terms with the loss of her mum.
Reply
#9
(05-10-2017, 02:31 PM)Goetia Wrote: It is a minefield this one as I was asking questions about this due to being in a similar situation but slightly reversed. What I know is:
 
If you have PR then you will likely get custody, the only thing that can change this is if:
 
  • The other guy adopts your daughter before her mum passes away, but that would need your consent so wont happen.
  • The other guy asks to also have PR over your daughter, now this again can only happen with your consent so wont happen, but even if it did it doesn’t guarantee him custody over her, it just gives him a stronger position if it went to court.
  • A challenge in court regarding custody based off a statement made in the mums will on who she wishes to be the parent of your daughter. However the fact you are the biological father and have regular access means his chances would be very slim indeed.
 
Hope that helps, but I still recommend getting your affairs in order by getting legal clarification so your prepared when it happens, as well as looking into grief services that might be able to help your daughter come to terms with the loss of her mum.
That's a fantastic sumarisation Goetia, thank you very much indeed.
Reply
#10
(05-10-2017, 02:47 PM)storkyIV Wrote:
(05-10-2017, 02:31 PM)Goetia Wrote: It is a minefield this one as I was asking questions about this due to being in a similar situation but slightly reversed. What I know is:
 
If you have PR then you will likely get custody, the only thing that can change this is if:
 
  • The other guy adopts your daughter before her mum passes away, but that would need your consent so wont happen.
  • The other guy asks to also have PR over your daughter, now this again can only happen with your consent so wont happen, but even if it did it doesn’t guarantee him custody over her, it just gives him a stronger position if it went to court.
  • A challenge in court regarding custody based off a statement made in the mums will on who she wishes to be the parent of your daughter. However the fact you are the biological father and have regular access means his chances would be very slim indeed.
 
Hope that helps, but I still recommend getting your affairs in order by getting legal clarification so your prepared when it happens, as well as looking into grief services that might be able to help your daughter come to terms with the loss of her mum.
That's a fantastic sumarisation Goetia, thank you very much indeed.

You're more than welcome. good luck
Reply




Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)