Separated Dads
My Story - Printable Version

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My Story - Brasso600 - 09-13-2018

Hello All
I guess I'm just looking for somewhere to share my story. Forgive me and I'll keep it brief.

Married 25 years ago, two late teenage children, but growing unhappiness in my marriage. My wife and I started to go in different directions about 15 years ago...maybe more. I became more active while my wife became sedentary, I wanted to persue interests while my wife wanted to sit down. I worked and my wife hasn't worked since pregnancy with our first. Celibacy came along ....years ago.

Wife is and has been a wonderful mother but is now embracing middle age while ......I'm not.


This sounds full of criticism and that wouldn't be fair. We just realised our differences and now we are afraid to split, but want to. I want to make the experience for our boys as painless as possible and I will be living a short way away from our house and able to be involved with the boys a lot. Our oldest has been told of the situation and he is reasonably ok, however the youngest refuses to engage when I try to speak to him. Wife won't help.

We are stuck in a situation where one child is holding things back....but not deliberately. I am going to have to just get on and move out but am fearful.

How was it for you ?

Cool


RE: My Story - Tamagoto - 09-13-2018

You can’t let anyone get in the way of your reasonable happiness. Even your kids.

You are allowed to and deserve to be happy and contented in your life and deserved it 15 years ago as well as today. You’re not hurting him, even indirectly, just doing something he doesn’t want. But - shocker - and you’ve no doubt taught him this about the world - the world is full of things you don’t want to happen.

Late teenage - so they’re about to leave the nest anyway, speaking from the larger perspective. They must know nothing stays the same, everything changes.


RE: My Story - Brasso600 - 09-15-2018

...thanks Tamagoto........ it is hard but I've got to get out of this no mans land

Smile