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Help and advice urgently needed - child safeguarding and protection
#1
Hi I'm looking for some advice really in how I can go forward in this very bad situation that we are in.
On Thursday last week I found out via a friend that my ex wife's partner had been convicted of multiple sexual assaults on a child. My ex wife and I have not been together since 2014. Initially I thought there had been a mistake so I contacted my wife who confirmed it. Naturally I was very angry and upset. She found out last November when he was charged and continued to allow this man to live with and have unsupervised access to my children. Social services did an initial assessment at the time with him and his child and deemed him a low risk. My ex wife then contacted them and said that she was in a relationship with him but that he doesn't have any alone contact with my kids. This is utter lies, he has lived with them since 2014 and takes them out, goes on holiday with them, looks after them when my ex wife is at work etc.... social services said they still consider him to be a low risk and DID NOT inform me. I have full parental responsibility and regular contact with my kids. 
I have since contacted social services and asked them why this has happened, originally they wouldn't accept fault but yesterday they did say it was an error and they would look into but I just can't get my head around why this has been allowed?? Any ideas? 
What's worse is that my ex wife is continuing to support her partner who has been given a very substantial sentence as well as being placed on the sex offenders register and not being allowed near girls under 18. I'm hugely concerned. I won't go into details about the things she has been saying but she has openly defended his actions and made excuses for them. 
My concern is that my children may have been abused by him, I don't think this is the case but I don't know 100% that they haven't been. I contacted the school yesterday as I thought I would just take them out and sit down and talk to them. She hadn't sent them in at all, and had basically hid them from me. She wouldn't answer her phone all day and wasn't at the house . I contacted social services who told me to seek legal advice and do what I need to to ensure they were safe I also contacted the police who were as useful as a chocolate teapot.  I eventually got hold of her about 9 pm and she was just a joke. She's told me I'm not seeing the kids at all until she can get into court and get an order preventing me from keeping them. I had said to her over the course of the two days that I do not think she is safe for the kids to be around and that I think they should live with me. However I will also say that I did offer her support and said that we all need to work together, she wasn't interested because she doesn't see an issue.  She also went on to say that she has never thought that he was a risk to the kids and even now doesn't. She again defended his actions and was offensive about his victim. I explained that I wanted to speak to the kids as I want to know that nothing has happened to them. She has told them that I am trying to take them away from her and that she won't be able to see them again. They are older but they do believe anything she says. 
I suppose my questions really are:

1) am I on a different planet or is this totally an unacceptable situation and 

2) where do I go from here

I'm considering an emergency hearing to try and get them but I'm concerned that a judge won't think it's urgent. 
I do think it's urgent because as far as I'm concerned if anything has happened to the kids then she may be telling them to lie about it to protect her partner. I should also mention that she has told the kids his been sent to prison but told them that it's all lies and he didn't do it. This again is very concerning. 

I think this man had manipulated her and I am genuinely concerned about there welfare. Any advice would be greatly appreciated

TIA
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#2
(11-19-2016, 07:24 PM)Truegunner01 Wrote: Hi I'm looking for some advice really in how I can go forward in this very bad situation that we are in.
On Thursday last week I found out via a friend that my ex wife's partner had been convicted of multiple sexual assaults on a child. My ex wife and I have not been together since 2014. Initially I thought there had been a mistake so I contacted my wife who confirmed it. Naturally I was very angry and upset. She found out last November when he was charged and continued to allow this man to live with and have unsupervised access to my children. Social services did an initial assessment at the time with him and his child and deemed him a low risk. My ex wife then contacted them and said that she was in a relationship with him but that he doesn't have any alone contact with my kids. This is utter lies, he has lived with them since 2014 and takes them out, goes on holiday with them, looks after them when my ex wife is at work etc.... social services said they still consider him to be a low risk and DID NOT inform me. I have full parental responsibility and regular contact with my kids. 
I have since contacted social services and asked them why this has happened, originally they wouldn't accept fault but yesterday they did say it was an error and they would look into but I just can't get my head around why this has been allowed?? Any ideas? 
What's worse is that my ex wife is continuing to support her partner who has been given a very substantial sentence as well as being placed on the sex offenders register and not being allowed near girls under 18. I'm hugely concerned. I won't go into details about the things she has been saying but she has openly defended his actions and made excuses for them. 
My concern is that my children may have been abused by him, I don't think this is the case but I don't know 100% that they haven't been. I contacted the school yesterday as I thought I would just take them out and sit down and talk to them. She hadn't sent them in at all, and had basically hid them from me. She wouldn't answer her phone all day and wasn't at the house . I contacted social services who told me to seek legal advice and do what I need to to ensure they were safe I also contacted the police who were as useful as a chocolate teapot.  I eventually got hold of her about 9 pm and she was just a joke. She's told me I'm not seeing the kids at all until she can get into court and get an order preventing me from keeping them. I had said to her over the course of the two days that I do not think she is safe for the kids to be around and that I think they should live with me. However I will also say that I did offer her support and said that we all need to work together, she wasn't interested because she doesn't see an issue.  She also went on to say that she has never thought that he was a risk to the kids and even now doesn't. She again defended his actions and was offensive about his victim. I explained that I wanted to speak to the kids as I want to know that nothing has happened to them. She has told them that I am trying to take them away from her and that she won't be able to see them again. They are older but they do believe anything she says. 
I suppose my questions really are:

1) am I on a different planet or is this totally an unacceptable situation and 

2) where do I go from here

I'm considering an emergency hearing to try and get them but I'm concerned that a judge won't think it's urgent. 
I do think it's urgent because as far as I'm concerned if anything has happened to the kids then she may be telling them to lie about it to protect her partner. I should also mention that she has told the kids his been sent to prison but told them that it's all lies and he didn't do it. This again is very concerning. 

I think this man had manipulated her and I am genuinely concerned about there welfare. Any advice would be greatly appreciated

TIA

I has a situation like this in my own case, but it was not the ex partner, another family member who was allowed after separation to come into contact with my children.

Where the cases are the same, he was deemed by the Local Authority to be Low Risk, as offences was over 20 years ago.

While a "Working Agreement" was done, saying he could not visit, the children could not go to where he lives, or they could not meet up anywhere else, I did not find out until I had evidence of this agreement not being followed, that it was not enforceable in any way.

Because I reported the breach of  the agreement to the Social Services, my ex also stopped contact.

What I done, and what my opinion is you can also do right now without Mediation is apply to Court for an Urgent Prohibited Steps, and a Child Arrangements Order.

With the Prohibited Steps, state in it the fact the he lives in the house, doing what most Step Dads would do, including looking after the child while your ex is at work. State that there is a big difference of opinion between you and the Local Authority's view of the situation, and that you feel this case should be handled by Cafcass, who you are willing to work/engage with.

With Child Arrangements, you would like an Interim Order made for contact, along the lines of Friday till Sunday every 2 weeks, and a mid week visit on the week you do not have the child at the weekend. You would also like telephone contact in place. You would also like half school holidays while the case is ongoing.

State in it that right now your Position long term is for the children to live with you, unless Cafcass and/or the Local Authority can put systems in place to ensure the child's safety, where you would still be wanting more towards a shared care situation.

Just to reassure you, in my case, Cafcass took the same view as me, and the Orders was made in line with their recommendations, NOT the Social Workers.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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