Thread Rating:
  • 1 Vote(s) - 5 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Solicitor v CSA
#1
I have two boys both of school age. Over a 14 day period they live with me 8 days and her 6. I claim child benefit for my eldest who came to live with me 4 years ago when me and my ex split. She claims for our youngest. Although I claim child benefit for my eldest I don't actually claim the money due to tax limits, I am just the named claimant. She is now wanting me to hand over the Child benefit for my eldest because I am not actually claiming the money. At first I had no issue with this as she claims she needs it more than me. I have not paid any child support for two years as I pay for literally everything, all the clothes school trips birthday parties take them on holiday twice a year the children  want for nothing i have never asked her for a penny.  The Child benefit agency have advised me that if I hand over the claim to her, she can then claim CSA on both the kids for up to 20% of my wage regardless of the fact they live with me more than they do her.
I am happy to hand the claim over as long as she gets a solicitors letter to say she will not go to the CSA after the claim is handed over.
My question is, how legally binding would that be? Would the CSA have any right to overrule the agreement if she went to the CSA. The simple fact is she is only after the money and has always only ever been after the money so the "trust me I wont go to the csa" line just doesn't wash with me.
Reply
#2
Child maintenance is paid to who ever gets the child benefit, a solicitors letter cannot override the statutes that are set out in law.
Reply
#3
(03-11-2016, 10:41 AM)Norfolk n Good Wrote: Child maintenance is paid to who ever gets the child benefit, a solicitors letter cannot override the statutes that are set out in law.

That's  what I feared. I can refuse to sign the claim over which will then result in a decision pending from the child benefit office. Think this will get messy now as she was screaming at me yesterday down the phone because I wouldn't hand it over to her. It's not the fact she will get an extra £13 quid a week, it's all the housing benefits she will get by having two kids registered with the child benefit. The simple fact is she couldn't care less about the kids she just wants the money. Her actions over the last four years have proven she isn't interested in the children.
Reply
#4
Are your arrangements regarding where your children live informal or court ordered? It won't really make a huge difference but if court ordered it does add evidence in your favour. If the time spent between the parents is 8/6 in your favour then you have very strong grounds to back up your position.

Are you in a position to have both children fulltime? If no court order in place there is nothing stopping you from just refusing to hand them over to your ex. You are a parent too.......
Reply
#5
(03-11-2016, 11:01 AM)Norfolk n Good Wrote: Are your arrangements regarding where your children live informal or court ordered? It won't really make a huge difference but if court ordered it does add evidence in your favour. If the time spent between the parents is 8/6 in your favour then you have very strong grounds to back up your position.

Are you in a position to have both children fulltime? If no court order in place there is nothing stopping you from just refusing to hand them over to your ex. You are a parent too.......

Thanks Norfolk n Good. They are informal. I choose not to go down the court route for the sake of the children but really wished I had now. I thought that the 8/6 split would work in my favour but having spoke to the csa and CB agency apparently not. She works in a college and tries to claim she has the boys throughout the school holidays which is total tosh. for example the six week holiday, I have the boys for two weeks on holiday and throughout the rest of the six weeks she has them in the daytime and I have them on the same nights as normal keeping the 8/6 night split.. Last Christmas she had them for 3 days but not for my youngest sons birthday (lateish December) as she asked me to have him even though it was her weekend because ...and I quote..."his birthday clashes with my works do" ....Suited me fine as I would have them all the time ....sorry it's difficult not to get bitter after everything she has put them through...violent partner drugs constant let downs etc ...
To answer your question , yes I can have them fulltime, my work allows me to take the boys to school and pick them up on Monday Tuesday and Wednesday. she does it on thurs and fri but if needed I can easily get them to school on them days. My eldest is 12 and can walk home from his school to my house where as his mother lives 5 miles away.
Reply
#6
If you can deal with it financially I'd be giving serious consideration to having them both with you fulltime. Especially if you can gather evidence regarding your ex seeing them more as a "cash cow" than any real attempts at motherhood. Remember equality goes both ways.
Reply
#7
(03-11-2016, 11:35 AM)Norfolk n Good Wrote: If you can deal with it financially I'd be giving serious consideration to having them both with you fulltime. Especially if you can gather evidence regarding your ex seeing them more as a "cash cow" than any real attempts at motherhood. Remember equality goes both ways.

I know. My girlfriend has been going on at me to do this for years. My issue is I know how manipulative she is and how she will divulge every single solicitors letter to the boys to try and get sympathy. She is the queen of the crocodile tear and the position she is in is always everybody else's fault. She is a one man Jeremy kyle show. I know full well she would use this to try and make the boys hate their dad for making mommy so upset. They are too young to understand it is for their best interests but she doesn't care about that, as long as she is getting the sympathy she doesn't care who it comes from, even if they are 12 and 6. I think my first step is to  decline her claim, then put all the reasons why her claim is not about the children but about family tax, housing benefit,Extra cash for her weed habit basically and if they still award her the claim I will have to go to a solicitor and fight her in the courts.
Reply
#8
If you can prove they spend the majority of the time with you then she's going to have a task justifying why she should get CB for both of them.

As you say you only get CB in theory because of tax issues I assume from that your earnings are over the threshold as limited by HMG. Can you get a decent solicitor involved on your side?

Narcissistic drama queens always shout loudly and play the "poor me" card, this in itself is a bloody good reason why the children would be better off with you. Kids learn from their parents and the longer this continues the more they are exposed to such histrionics which isn't good for their individual long term development or society in general.
Reply
#9
(03-11-2016, 12:13 PM)Norfolk n Good Wrote: If you can prove they spend the majority of the time with you then she's going to have a task justifying why she should get CB for both of them.

As you say you only get CB in theory because of tax issues I assume from that your earnings are over the threshold as limited by HMG. Can you get a decent solicitor involved on your side?

Narcissistic drama queens always shout loudly and play the "poor me" card, this in itself is a bloody good reason why the children would be better off with you. Kids learn from their parents and the longer this continues the more they are exposed to such histrionics which isn't good for their individual long term development or society in general.

Yes I am starting to see it play out in my youngest who has started to become a worry post. Think I don't have much choice really but to go all the way. Thanks Norfolk n good.
Reply
#10
I'm sure it'll be worth it for them in the long term, and if your ex hasn't got the children to poison then she'll have to find someone else to ruin.

Chin up.....we're always here Smile
Reply




Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)