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Potential Divorce
Hi All,

I'm seriously contemplating divorce, but there is one thing holding me back and has been holding me back for a while children.

I have a 4.5 year old girl and a 14 month old girl. They are my EVERYTHING and visa versa. Being able to only see them for potentially half the time just breaks me. It hurts me even more to think that some other guy would end up potentially being their 'dad' and my little angles would call them that. It's not that I don't have an incredible relationship with both of them, but they are only little and if someone else ends up spending 50% of the time with them, I wouldn't blame them if they did. But it would kill me inside. Also, the 14 month old might end up not knowing the difference between me and the new guy. She would probably see us as equal fathers.

I realise you have probably been through a lot worse, but I am so sad right now. I can't loose my babies. Can anyone comfort me?
It's got to be one of the major reasons people come to a site dedicated to dads separating from their wives, so you're not alone by any stretch of the imagination.

I was basically where you were 10 years ago and I made the decision not to risk getting little contact with my kids and to try to maintain a stable home for them. I'm here because a decade later it's simply not worked. My kids suffer from being in an incredibly tense environment (and because my wife is emotionally abusive towards everyone in the home) and it looks like it's going to end up in separation anyway and the same uncertainty I've feared.

So, although your kids may have other relationships, try to choose what is the "least bad" solution for them. That is, even though it's not great to be in single parent households, it's better than being in the middle of a fight all of the time. We've no idea if we'll be thanked for it but we can at least say we did our best.

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