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False Allegation Domestic Abuse
#1
I recently made an application to the Family Court for Enforcement of a Child Contact Order.  There was an order already in place it has been denied on and off for some time.
 
I made an application for enforcement along with it a chronological diary of evidence of none-contact and the first directions hearing has now taken place.
 
When I attended court I discovered that my ex-wife has made allegations of historical domestic abuse against me in the Cafcass report (this is the first time this allegation has ever been made) and the court seemed to believe her claims despite the fact that she produced no evidence what-so-ever.  I provided reams of aggressive and malicious communications from her, but it seems my evidence has not even been considered and the fact that she has blatantly abused a court order has been completely over-looked.
 
I have come away from this feeling extremely upset, confused and frustrated that I am being portrayed in this way when I was following proper court procedures asking for their help so I can see my kids but my ex has lied throuh her teeth with these fabrications and the court officials did not listen to anything I had to say I don;t think they even read any of my evidence.

Has anyone else been through this and how did the subsequent hearings go?  Will they eventually listen to my side of things?

Thank you.
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#2
Hi RoJo1974

I joined this site just so I could reply as I have had a similar experience to yourself. My (STBX) wife also made domestic abuse allegations against me, despite being the one who attacked me when we separated and had a history of being abusive (violent, verbal and psychologically) towards me. She went to social services, doctor and the police each time telling more and more horrific version of her stories. After having to be interviewed by both police and social services and no charges being brought I thought it would be over when I explained that it was her the violent one and the only time I struck her back was in self defense trying to get out out of her way when she had me cornered. I found the entire experience very intimidating and scary having never been in trouble with the police or social services before, luckily they could see the lies that my (STBX) wife had made. Unfortunately she then lawyered up (with a equally aggressive law firm) and then made a number of demands that I attend domestic violence courses, anger management and parenting course before I would get to see my children, Doing these courses would take over a year and would have meant that I would have to miss large parts of work that I couldn't afford to do.

I tried to mediate and she refused and I ended up taking her to court. In my court case I claimed that she was the violent and aggressive one in the relationship. We had to have a fact finding day and I was able to prove that her story was fabricated and that she had been the violent one attacking me (albeit came worse off because I caught her foot when she kicked me and she ended up falling over off balance). The case then was referred to Cafcass. I hope you never have to use Cafcass as my interaction with them was a almost as traumatic as loosing contact with my children. They seemed to be inherently biased towards my wife, and seemed determined to overwrite the fact finding day result and turn me into the violent one, agreeing with my wife that I should undertake domestic violence courses. My wife then suddenly decided to make allegations alluding my parents were paedophiles and then Cafcass where demanding privet medical records of my parents (Despite them being nothing as such). The entire experience made me lose faith in the system and caused considerable distress to my self and my parents. When we went back to court the judge pretty much dismissed the entire cafcass report as it didn't take into account the previous court finding (of my (stbx) wife being the violent party) and because it was so biased in her favour. In the end I got given a right to see my beautiful girls, and got given a right to have my time with them to increase over time. Unfortunately the court order was silent in the respect when my time should increase. I have just been offered an hour increase on my time (the first time in a year), so I have 5 hours a week with my daughters currently after a year of being separated.

It looks as if I will have to take her back to court again as she has refused any form of discussion or mediation on the subject again. The cost of legal fees are getting ridiculous, but I would do anything to make sure I have a good relationship with my daughters going forward (a fact my (stbx) wife knows and why she is using my access to them to hurt me). I am very lucky to be in a position to have parents who can can loan me the cost of my legal fees as without them I would be on the street.

So in my experience the court and police seemed to be quite fair, but Cafcass was a nightmare. The truth will always come out, and at least I know I will be able to look my children in the eye and tell them the truth when they understand and be able to tell them that I never stopped fighting for them. To be honest it is the only thing that has kept me going at times.

Best of luck to you and I hope that you get a fair hearing
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#3
(01-04-2017, 03:33 PM)RoJo1974 Wrote: I recently made an application to the Family Court for Enforcement of a Child Contact Order.  There was an order already in place it has been denied on and off for some time.
 
I made an application for enforcement along with it a chronological diary of evidence of none-contact and the first directions hearing has now taken place.
 
When I attended court I discovered that my ex-wife has made allegations of historical domestic abuse against me in the Cafcass report (this is the first time this allegation has ever been made) and the court seemed to believe her claims despite the fact that she produced no evidence what-so-ever.  I provided reams of aggressive and malicious communications from her, but it seems my evidence has not even been considered and the fact that she has blatantly abused a court order has been completely over-looked.
 
I have come away from this feeling extremely upset, confused and frustrated that I am being portrayed in this way when I was following proper court procedures asking for their help so I can see my kids but my ex has lied throuh her teeth with these fabrications and the court officials did not listen to anything I had to say I don;t think they even read any of my evidence.

Has anyone else been through this and how did the subsequent hearings go?  Will they eventually listen to my side of things?

Thank you.

Is the dates of the claims of Domestic Violence before or after the Court Order was made, and how long ago is she saying it took place?
Is there Police involvement?
Is she surge sting that you are a danger to the child, if so how?

If you do not want this information in public view, click on my ID, and you will see a link to Private Message me, or Email.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#4
this is familiar. my experience was the same. unfortunately i cant tell you any good news. the court/judge will believe mum. no prove needed. its unfair but its normal dads in court. if you try and speak up in court the judge can/may tell you to be quiet or hold you in contempt.
Cafcass! no words can describe their behaviour.
My only advice is dont go in alone. If cafcass attend in person and its a big IF, they love to rip into dads. A decent sol will stop them at least in the courtroom
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#5
I am in the same position however I am fighting them all alone by myself.

I got interviewed by the police twice and it was quite intimidating however on both occasion I kept my cool and instead the detectives had no option but to accept what I had to say.

My experience with the Police and Social Services is that statistically they count on you to do something stupid while you are waiting for hearing or bail etc as they do not have anything substantial to hold against you because the ex. make some allegation out of thin air. but they would always held your current actions against you to prove that how you behaved now represents what kind of person you are and if anything of your current behaviour even remotely resembles the allegations made against you would be amazed that they would always bring that into conversations in the courts.

Your best option is to look for their weaknesses in their report as most of them are so overconfident and working on multiple cases at time that they forget what they said in the previous reports. read their reports,statements and transcripts of any interviews with you and your ex and their recommendations you would be amazed that there would alot of clues for you to keep repeating it in court to beat them at their game.

I am doing the same thing. I go to court myself and I keep my tone in very firm but respectable manner to ensure I finish my point of views and I told the judge few times to please your honour let me finish what I saying as I am the one who submitted the application in the court and I believe these agencies are biased and I going to prove it.

Once the Cafcass and social Service get the hint that you are after them they would get the message and back off.

I do not have solicitor because I believe professionally they work along Social Services and Cafcass so they have this familiarity between them and may not fight for me as hard as I would do myself because I only can feel how much damage they are making to my case, the solicitor only take you just another client, they will move on and the next client may have the same social worker that they fight against in your case.

I have been to court nearly 4 times by now and with the information and help gathered from this forum my cost sofar is the application fee of £215 and I feel good because I did it myself.
My Case bundle is very organised chronologically and I take my time in the court to ensure I tick all the question before the judge say lets finish Smile

I am sure Mark has given some advice about how to go forward my rant above was just to prove to you that they know that most women in these situation would use any excuses available to a women in the book to try and hurt you. You just need to point it out to the judge and I am sure they would see some sense in your arguments.

Your only loss is that it was her who made the allegations first. I am sure you'll have the last laugh. Just keep your head down and don't give in to give up.
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#6
Respect to dad of 2. Well done for getting to say your piece. Maybe a little lucky with the judge. My judge constantly cut me down. Not the few times when I had a sol.
On a separate point, my ex went to the plod with a false claim and wanted a Harassment order. Plod phoned me at 10pm to tell me they were visiting me that night to give me the third degree. I said no. Spent 30 minutes on the phone explaining why her claim was false. At the end the Sgt says "right we,'ll left it there". I wasn't issued one piece of paper or signed anything. So me thinks, end of.
6 months later in court for contact, it comes out I have a Harassment order against me. News to me. Also it runs for 12 months. If I had do something stupid I would of got locked up. Magic.
And u can't report the police to anyone for not doing their job right.
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