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Interim
#1
Hi,

I'm going to be receiving a letter from my ex's solicitor next week outlining what she wants regarding access. I'm presuming it'll be insistent on supervised access once or twice a week and I'm really not happy with this as it'll involve being in a hostile environment (i.e. with her and her mam)

If I dispute what she's insisting on and we have to go to mediation then court, what happens with contact with my son in the times between now and actually going to mediation/court?

Thanks.
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#2
i,m not an expert, but i have hear solicitors telling lots of lies to dads. Her sol may say supervised means ex there. A contact would not advise supervise with ex.
By the way the ex would need to prove grounds why she wants supervised. This will mean Casfass and that means court.

I asked the court for contact in a family centre from the word go.
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#3
(01-20-2017, 04:40 PM)jamesbond Wrote: i,m not an expert, but i have hear solicitors telling lots of lies to dads. Her sol may say supervised means ex there. A contact would not advise supervise with ex.
By the way the ex would need to prove grounds why she wants supervised. This will mean Casfass and that means court.

I asked the court for contact in a family centre from the word go.

Well I spoke to her solicitor this morning and queried the advice he gave and he denied ever giving it. Then he said, 'whatever I've told her is the correct information' suggesting he doesn't have much basic recall when it comes to dispensing legal advice. He then said he'd be sending a letter outlining what access my ex is insisting I'm allowed (I'm presuming supervised with her and her mother present - which I'll contest) and this letter will be going to my solicitor as he 'refuses to discuss this' with me. I informed him I'd be representing myself and he'd best send it to me once it's been drafted. He agreed then hung up. It all seems utterly bizarre and strange.

Now the past 3-4 weeks I've had a basic arrangement in place - a texted weekly contact arrangement with my ex that we've stuck to and has worked well. It has been with her present and I was fine because it's usually after work around about the time we feed him, bath him, sort him for bed etc. Then occasionally I've stayed for a bite to eat or a glass of wine to keep things civil. This was going good - as recent as last night (19th) when we had a glass of wine and a bit chat. Then this morning she said I could pop over on my way to work to see my son for 5 minutes and give him a hug and she started really insulting my mam for some reason - calling her manipulative and argumentative. Now I've kept my family on a short leash through all of this so I was taken aback and - probably foolishly - immediately went on the defensive, saying it's uncalled for and wrong for her to be so spiteful.

She then said she won't allow me to the house to see my son unless her mam's with her and this is what the letter is going to confirm. I know it's not a court order so I'm going to challenge it which is why I was asking about interim contact before mediation and court.

Thing is, her insisting on her mam being there will automatically create a hostile environment as she doesn't like me and does her best to try and rile me up, usually by shouting in my face. I think my ex creating this environment is bad for my son so I'm flummoxed as to why she's insisting on it, aside from wanting to hurt me.

Sorry for going on but I'd love someone to explain to me how ex-girlfriends/wives seem reasonable and cogent one minute then utterly horrific in the most upsetting way possible the next.
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#4
(01-20-2017, 06:40 PM)strider Wrote: Sorry for going on but I'd love someone to explain to me how ex-girlfriends/wives seem reasonable and cogent one minute then utterly horrific in the most upsetting way possible the next.

You will get to understand that one day....on your last dying breath and you cant even pass on all the knowledge of how women work.

I didnt think my ex was too bright but she turned into a vile harpy of the worst type when we split
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#5
True. U will never work it out. Just give up trying. There are better things to focus on.
I will never work out my ex , my ex friends, my ex neighbours, and my own relatives. Their behaviour is not rational and it took me years to drop it
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