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Overseas Fathers Access Rights
#1
Good morning all, new joiner here. Looking for some information/advice from anyone who may experience in this issue or know of my rights.

I am currently working/living overseas and have done so for 5 years. Around three years ago my wife and I divorced which resulted in her moving back to Scotland. Whenever I have gone back home on vacation I have had no issues in seeing my son BUT this was always before the divorce was finalised.  Since the divorce my ex has proven very difficult when it comes to any decisions around my son and I have always just gone along with her wishes. 

Although I am not able to be there all the time I do send a decent amount of money each month so there are no issues on that side. I am coming back for a visit this year and my ex is making a lot of demands which quite frankly i am not happy with.

I will be in the UK for 1 week and already she has stated i can only see him once/twice as he has school. I totally understand the laws around kids attending school and would in no way want to cos him/her any issues with this just to satisfy my wants. As this is his first term at school I was looking forward to the possibility of dropping/picking him up from school at least one day as any proud father would but she has said no to this as she would feel "awkward" among the other parents! She has also stated that on the day(s) i do spend with him that she will also be present the entire time which I am not acceptable of as I will be with my new partner and that situation just wouldn't work. She affords her new partner a lot of rights to my son yet I cannot see him alone for one day!

I have tried so many times to play by her rules but it is now getting beyond a joke and I wish to know if there is any legal way I can assure my rights as a father especially if I am currently living overseas.

Any advice/thoughts will be mostly appreciated.

Thank you.
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#2
Hi,

I assume that you have PR for your child as you were married to the mother when the child was born and that you are named as father on the BC.

How much maintenance you pay is not relevant when it comes to contact. The court regards this as 2 complete separate issues.

Since your child is now resident in Scotland the courts there have jurisdiction and Scottish law will be applied. I presume it will be somewhat similar to U.K. Family law on contact.

If you can not come to any agreement with your ex you need to bring this to court in Scotland.

Normally in such cases the judge will or should try to be as much accommodating towards you since you only have very limited direct contact.

However, if you bring this court you may be asked to take your holidays according to the school holidays of your child.

You will not get an order which allows you to phone up mom and ask her to have contact with your child in a random week.

If you apply to court have indirect contact such as Skype and FaceTime included and ask that mum calls you rather you her to avoid the phone not being picked up.

F.
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#3
(01-24-2017, 05:32 AM)Paolov2378 Wrote: Good morning all, new joiner here. Looking for some information/advice from anyone who may experience in this issue or know of my rights.

I am currently working/living overseas and have done so for 5 years. Around three years ago my wife and I divorced which resulted in her moving back to Scotland. Whenever I have gone back home on vacation I have had no issues in seeing my son BUT this was always before the divorce was finalised.  Since the divorce my ex has proven very difficult when it comes to any decisions around my son and I have always just gone along with her wishes. 

Although I am not able to be there all the time I do send a decent amount of money each month so there are no issues on that side. I am coming back for a visit this year and my ex is making a lot of demands which quite frankly i am not happy with.

I will be in the UK for 1 week and already she has stated i can only see him once/twice as he has school. I totally understand the laws around kids attending school and would in no way want to cos him/her any issues with this just to satisfy my wants. As this is his first term at school I was looking forward to the possibility of dropping/picking him up from school at least one day as any proud father would but she has said no to this as she would feel "awkward" among the other parents! She has also stated that on the day(s) i do spend with him that she will also be present the entire time which I am not acceptable of as I will be with my new partner and that situation just wouldn't work. She affords her new partner a lot of rights to my son yet I cannot see him alone for one day!

I have tried so many times to play by her rules but it is now getting beyond a joke and I wish to know if there is any legal way I can assure my rights as a father especially if I am currently living overseas.

Any advice/thoughts will be mostly appreciated.

Thank you.

Having PR means you your ex has to keep you informed on Education and Medical Issues. If no Court Order exists regrading the Child, then you are both on the same legal standing in the UK. If an order has made her the Resident Parent, it still does not alter the fact you have PR.

It is ridicules that she will not let you drop the child off at school, and just to prove a point, I would turn up at the school, without the child, to make an appointment to see the class teacher. Explain that you are not normally in the UK, and that you just want an update from them on your child's progress. It might be they can also start to send you newsletters by email, let you buy school photos etc.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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