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Access to my child
#1
Hi All

Hoping someone on here can point me in the right direction on this, Up untill August last year I had regular access to my daughter with and agreement that I would have her Friday evening to Sunday evening (Sometimes even Monday if I asked) and all was ok, Regular contact and always informed each other if our daughter wasnt very well and all the usual things split couples would 'talk' about.

Anyway I have since started going out with someone else (Bearing in mind me and my daughters mother parted ways when our daughter was 6 months old and decided end of 2015 we would give things another go... but didnt work out as you can imagine) My new partner has a daughter herself same age as mine and they get along like any 5 years olds would... love winding each other up and causing mayhem, Things was all ok for a month or two then my daughter started telling her mother what we was getting up to and she turned around and said i do not want our daughter around my partners daughter as apparently she is a bad influence and me being me I carried on regardless as at the time I thought she was been jealous and still maintain this is the reason why for my current predicament.

But now she has cut off all my access to my daughter and keeps making silly demands that I have adhered to but now Im fed up of playing her games and want my weekends back with my daughter

How do i go about this? I have tried mediation which was a huge waste of time and money in my opinion as all it did was get my ex to voice what i already knew and little is improving

I currently see my daughter on Saturdays if i ask at the start of the week and if she even acknowledges the message but even then I only am allowed to see her for 2/3 hours tops and am not allowed to take her out of the area where she lives with her mother. I want to be able to let my daughter see the rest of my family aswell as at present my daughter has not seen my grandparents (Huge part of my life due to they took me in and helped me raise my daughter) for nearly 4 months so Im now at the end of my tether with all of this as I have been very patient waiting to see if my ex gets bored of playing this game which she hasnt yet

Apologies for the wall of text to read here but I hope someone can point me in the right direction of what I can do to help this situation, I am registered on my daughters birth certificate too if that helps

Thanks
Reply
#2
Hi,

Do you have a written agreement from the previous mediation which outlines the contact you wish to have?

If so, ask your ex if she gives her consent to legally formalise this into a consent order. If the court endorses this order you can then enforce it if your ex does not comply.

Most likely she will not agree to a consent order.

If you can show to the court that you have gone to mediation and that the agreement there is not followed I believe you can apply straight away to court for a child arrangement order / contact order.

There is no other way than through court if mediation has failed or your agreement is not honoured.

F.
Reply
#3
(01-24-2017, 12:35 PM)Ave1991 Wrote: Hi All

Hoping someone on here can point me in the right direction on this, Up untill August last year I had regular access to my daughter with and agreement that I would have her Friday evening to Sunday evening (Sometimes even Monday if I asked) and all was ok, Regular contact and always informed each other if our daughter wasnt very well and all the usual things split couples would 'talk' about.

Anyway I have since started going out with someone else (Bearing in mind me and my daughters mother parted ways when our daughter was 6 months old and decided end of 2015 we would give things another go... but didnt work out as you can imagine) My new partner has a daughter herself same age as mine and they get along like any 5 years olds would... love winding each other up and causing mayhem, Things was all ok for a month or two then my daughter started telling her mother what we was getting up to and she turned around and said i do not want our daughter around my partners daughter as apparently she is a bad influence and me being me I carried on regardless as at the time I thought she was been jealous and still maintain this is the reason why for my current predicament.

But now she has cut off all my access to my daughter and keeps making silly demands that I have adhered to but now Im fed up of playing her games and want my weekends back with my daughter

How do i go about this? I have tried mediation which was a huge waste of time and money in my opinion as all it did was get my ex to voice what i already knew and little is improving

I currently see my daughter on Saturdays if i ask at the start of the week and if she even acknowledges the message but even then I only am allowed to see her for 2/3 hours tops and am not allowed to take her out of the area where she lives with her mother. I want to be able to let my daughter see the rest of my family aswell as at present my daughter has not seen my grandparents (Huge part of my life due to they took me in and helped me raise my daughter) for nearly 4 months so Im now at the end of my tether with all of this as I have been very patient waiting to see if my ex gets bored of playing this game which she hasnt yet

Apologies for the wall of text to read here but I hope someone can point me in the right direction of what I can do to help this situation, I am registered on my daughters birth certificate too if that helps

Thanks
Apply to Court for Child Arrangements, as Mediation has failed.

The fact that she allowed staying contact means that aspect has been ruled on.

There should be no restrictions on where you take your daughter. Until this order is made, you are in fact on the same legal standing as you both have PR.

You will not get every weekend unless its by agreement, as the court has to ensure both parents get Quality time.

My advise is to ask for Friday till Sunday/Monday every 2 weeks, and on the other week, 1 or 2 mid week visits for play and dinner, or stay over.

You can also get up to half school holidays, what is 6.5 weeks a year. A 4 week plan would normally be 1 week at Easter and Christmas, and 2 weeks (plus a normal weekend) in the summer.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
Reply
#4
(01-24-2017, 06:23 PM)Frisbos Wrote: Hi,

Do you have a written agreement from the previous mediation which outlines the contact you wish to have?

If so, ask your ex if she gives her consent to legally formalise this into a consent order. If the court endorses this order you can then enforce it if your ex does not comply.

Most likely she will not agree to a consent order.

If you can show to the court that you have gone to mediation and that the agreement there is not followed I believe you can apply straight away to court for a child arrangement order / contact order.

There is no other way than through court if mediation has failed or your agreement is not honoured.

F.

Hi Frisbos

No I have never had it down as a written agreement unfortuantely, It was all vocal only and maybe on a text (To be honest I cant remember)

All I stated on the mediation when I attended it was to be included more in my daughters school work (Im not even down as an emergency contact for her school... yet my ex partners on again off again partner is which causes me a great deal of concern which has been voiced and ignored many times) and to be able to have my daughter overnight again

Not like im asking for outrageous requests here

(01-24-2017, 09:04 PM)MarkR Wrote:
(01-24-2017, 12:35 PM)Ave1991 Wrote: Hi All

Hoping someone on here can point me in the right direction on this, Up untill August last year I had regular access to my daughter with and agreement that I would have her Friday evening to Sunday evening (Sometimes even Monday if I asked) and all was ok, Regular contact and always informed each other if our daughter wasnt very well and all the usual things split couples would 'talk' about.

Anyway I have since started going out with someone else (Bearing in mind me and my daughters mother parted ways when our daughter was 6 months old and decided end of 2015 we would give things another go... but didnt work out as you can imagine) My new partner has a daughter herself same age as mine and they get along like any 5 years olds would... love winding each other up and causing mayhem, Things was all ok for a month or two then my daughter started telling her mother what we was getting up to and she turned around and said i do not want our daughter around my partners daughter as apparently she is a bad influence and me being me I carried on regardless as at the time I thought she was been jealous and still maintain this is the reason why for my current predicament.

But now she has cut off all my access to my daughter and keeps making silly demands that I have adhered to but now Im fed up of playing her games and want my weekends back with my daughter

How do i go about this? I have tried mediation which was a huge waste of time and money in my opinion as all it did was get my ex to voice what i already knew and little is improving

I currently see my daughter on Saturdays if i ask at the start of the week and if she even acknowledges the message but even then I only am allowed to see her for 2/3 hours tops and am not allowed to take her out of the area where she lives with her mother. I want to be able to let my daughter see the rest of my family aswell as at present my daughter has not seen my grandparents (Huge part of my life due to they took me in and helped me raise my daughter) for nearly 4 months so Im now at the end of my tether with all of this as I have been very patient waiting to see if my ex gets bored of playing this game which she hasnt yet

Apologies for the wall of text to read here but I hope someone can point me in the right direction of what I can do to help this situation, I am registered on my daughters birth certificate too if that helps

Thanks
Apply to Court for Child Arrangements, as Mediation has failed.

The fact that she allowed staying contact means that aspect has been ruled on.

There should be no restrictions on where you take your daughter. Until this order is made, you are in fact on the same legal standing as you both have PR.

You will not get every weekend unless its by agreement, as the court has to ensure both parents get Quality time.

My advise is to ask for Friday till Sunday/Monday every 2 weeks, and on the other week, 1 or 2 mid week visits for play and dinner, or stay over.

You can also get up to half school holidays, what is 6.5 weeks a year. A 4 week plan would normally be 1 week at Easter and Christmas, and 2 weeks (plus a normal weekend) in the summer.

Hi Mark

Do you know what forms i would need to complete for child arrangements? Long as I can even see my daughter 2 weekends a month including overnight that would be fine with me as i understand she has a right to spend time with her mother aswell

Thanks
Reply
#5
(01-31-2017, 08:52 AM)Ave1991 Wrote:
(01-24-2017, 06:23 PM)Frisbos Wrote: Hi,

Do you have a written agreement from the previous mediation which outlines the contact you wish to have?

If so, ask your ex if she gives her consent to legally formalise this into a consent order. If the court endorses this order you can then enforce it if your ex does not comply.

Most likely she will not agree to a consent order.

If you can show to the court that you have gone to mediation and that the agreement there is not followed I believe you can apply straight away to court for a child arrangement order / contact order.

There is no other way than through court if mediation has failed or your agreement is not honoured.

F.

Hi Frisbos

No I have never had it down as a written agreement unfortuantely, It was all vocal only and maybe on a text (To be honest I cant remember)

All I stated on the mediation when I attended it was to be included more in my daughters school work (Im not even down as an emergency contact for her school... yet my ex partners on again off again partner is which causes me a great deal of concern which has been voiced and ignored many times) and to be able to have my daughter overnight again

Not like im asking for outrageous requests here

(01-24-2017, 09:04 PM)MarkR Wrote:
(01-24-2017, 12:35 PM)Ave1991 Wrote: Hi All

Hoping someone on here can point me in the right direction on this, Up untill August last year I had regular access to my daughter with and agreement that I would have her Friday evening to Sunday evening (Sometimes even Monday if I asked) and all was ok, Regular contact and always informed each other if our daughter wasnt very well and all the usual things split couples would 'talk' about.

Anyway I have since started going out with someone else (Bearing in mind me and my daughters mother parted ways when our daughter was 6 months old and decided end of 2015 we would give things another go... but didnt work out as you can imagine) My new partner has a daughter herself same age as mine and they get along like any 5 years olds would... love winding each other up and causing mayhem, Things was all ok for a month or two then my daughter started telling her mother what we was getting up to and she turned around and said i do not want our daughter around my partners daughter as apparently she is a bad influence and me being me I carried on regardless as at the time I thought she was been jealous and still maintain this is the reason why for my current predicament.

But now she has cut off all my access to my daughter and keeps making silly demands that I have adhered to but now Im fed up of playing her games and want my weekends back with my daughter

How do i go about this? I have tried mediation which was a huge waste of time and money in my opinion as all it did was get my ex to voice what i already knew and little is improving

I currently see my daughter on Saturdays if i ask at the start of the week and if she even acknowledges the message but even then I only am allowed to see her for 2/3 hours tops and am not allowed to take her out of the area where she lives with her mother. I want to be able to let my daughter see the rest of my family aswell as at present my daughter has not seen my grandparents (Huge part of my life due to they took me in and helped me raise my daughter) for nearly 4 months so Im now at the end of my tether with all of this as I have been very patient waiting to see if my ex gets bored of playing this game which she hasnt yet

Apologies for the wall of text to read here but I hope someone can point me in the right direction of what I can do to help this situation, I am registered on my daughters birth certificate too if that helps

Thanks
Apply to Court for Child Arrangements, as Mediation has failed.

The fact that she allowed staying contact means that aspect has been ruled on.

There should be no restrictions on where you take your daughter. Until this order is made, you are in fact on the same legal standing as you both have PR.

You will not get every weekend unless its by agreement, as the court has to ensure both parents get Quality time.

My advise is to ask for Friday till Sunday/Monday every 2 weeks, and on the other week, 1 or 2 mid week visits for play and dinner, or stay over.

You can also get up to half school holidays, what is 6.5 weeks a year. A 4 week plan would normally be 1 week at Easter and Christmas, and 2 weeks (plus a normal weekend) in the summer.

Hi Mark

Do you know what forms i would need to complete for child arrangements? Long as I can even see my daughter 2 weekends a month including overnight that would be fine with me as i understand she has a right to spend time with her mother aswell

Thanks

It is a C100. To lodge it at court costs £215, reduced if on a low income, free if on some benefits. That is your only court cost, regardless of how many hearings it goes to.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
Reply




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