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Am I being unreasonable???

In a disputed case you would not get overnight contact with a young child as yours.

My youngest child is 1.5 years old and I have asked to vary my very unspecific contact order to a defined contact order.

Guess what, the district judge is very reluctant to do that because [quote] I don't know what contact is best for your children because they are so young [quote].

So in my experience the courts are very careful and try to push the responsibility for making contact agreements back to the parents. That is good if the parents can communicate but very shit if the parents hate each other.

I don't see you leaving with an order the way you want it if you go to court to be honest.

(02-02-2017, 10:05 PM)Octochamp Wrote:
(02-02-2017, 09:06 PM)MarkR Wrote: You are lucky what what you have in place, as in a disputed court case, until the Child is 2 no staying contact would be ordered.
As it has happened, you have a case for it to carry on.

Therefore, due to your availability Saturday 5pm till Sunday 7pm every 2 weeks, is the best you will get in a Court. You would also get up to half school holidays, what is 6.5 weeks a year. If you can not manage that, a 4 week plan is 1 week Easter and Christmas and 2 weeks in the summer (plus a normal weekend).

Do you mean like this?

Week 1: Saturday 5pm - Sunday 7pm
Week 2: Saturday 5pm - Sunday 7pm
Week 3: No contact

And back to week 1?

See, she wants me to have her every weekend, saying its not fair that I have the one saturday to myself... so I think the above would be worse for both of us...

(02-02-2017, 09:44 PM)Hazy Wrote: If she wants to dispute it in court you'll not get overnights until they are aged 2+.

I have contacted a solicitor about this and have been assured that this would not happen according to the consultation I had. The only way I'd lose contact as per usual would be if she suggested violence or drink/drug problems, which isn't the case.

(02-02-2017, 09:23 PM)Frisbos Wrote: Hi,

Just to confirm, your child is 7months old and you have overnight contact???


Yes, that's correct, no spelling mistakes or otherwise in what I've wrote.

My suggestion was

Week 1, Saturday 5pm till Sunday 7pm
Week 2, No Contact.

While you have existing arrangements, all she needs to change it is a significant reason, and if she was to say she does not have enough block quality time she would be able to get it changed.

When a case is in dispute, the normal is Friday till Sunday every 2 weeks unless like in your situation where you can not do that due to your availability.

If she is happy for you to have every weekend take it, but bear in mind at any point she could change things.

While the money side of things has no legal bearing on a case, note that Child Support only has a reduction is its "Staying Contact", and that only kicks in if you exceed 52 nights a year.

Why most people was shocked about you having the child overnight, is there are several members with young children who can not get staying contact until the child is 2. The reason for this, is unless its happened and you can therefore show that provision was made for feeding the baby, no could awards overnight, due to Government Guidelines on promoting Breastfeeding.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.

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