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Urgent! Advice on child access
#1
Hi all, 

My housemate has been struggling with getting contact to see his son for a long time now. He has been separated from his ex girlfriend for 3 years now and contact has been given however not regularly. In the past 10 months he has seen his child for 4 of them. He never knows when the next time he will see his son again is as she will randomly stop contact with him for up to 2-3 months at a time with no reason given. 

He tried mediation which she failed to turn up to. He has also sent 3 letters the 3rd being sent a week ago. Costing him an incredible £160 for that 1 letter he most recently sent. All has been in vain however as she would just ignore them. The last time he saw his son was on the 14th of December and his Christmas presents are still sitting waiting to be opened. He has kept very calm given the situation and had to resort to going to his school just to find out if he was ok. 

She has finally contacted him after all this time with a solicitor letter explaining that he will not be able to have contact as he was violent towards her leaving a red mark. However he has not been in contact with her face to face in years apart from once at her work with a store full of witnesses.  She has also allowed his son to visit many times since he last saw her, meaning that her claims have only just become important enough to stop contact. He is beside himself with grief and feels pushed aside, I feel like his solicitors should be doing more considering the amount he has paid in fees. 

Surely she should not be able to get away with this?! Is there any advice that could help his situation? Or speed things along. As she has failed to turn up to a mediation and he has sent plenty of letters surely this should be sent to court? However they are trying to say it could take months even though he has already waiting long enough. 

Any advice would be helpful thank you!!!
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#2
(03-06-2017, 08:12 PM)bagelheaven Wrote: Hi all, 

My housemate has been struggling with getting contact to see his son for a long time now. He has been separated from his ex girlfriend for 3 years now and contact has been given however not regularly. In the past 10 months he has seen his child for 4 of them. He never knows when the next time he will see his son again is as she will randomly stop contact with him for up to 2-3 months at a time with no reason given. 

He tried mediation which she failed to turn up to. He has also sent 3 letters the 3rd being sent a week ago. Costing him an incredible £160 for that 1 letter he most recently sent. All has been in vain however as she would just ignore them. The last time he saw his son was on the 14th of December and his Christmas presents are still sitting waiting to be opened. He has kept very calm given the situation and had to resort to going to his school just to find out if he was ok. 

She has finally contacted him after all this time with a solicitor letter explaining that he will not be able to have contact as he was violent towards her leaving a red mark. However he has not been in contact with her face to face in years apart from once at her work with a store full of witnesses.  She has also allowed his son to visit many times since he last saw her, meaning that her claims have only just become important enough to stop contact. He is beside himself with grief and feels pushed aside, I feel like his solicitors should be doing more considering the amount he has paid in fees. 

Surely she should not be able to get away with this?! Is there any advice that could help his situation? Or speed things along. As she has failed to turn up to a mediation and he has sent plenty of letters surely this should be sent to court? However they are trying to say it could take months even though he has already waiting long enough. 

Any advice would be helpful thank you!!!

He now has a Direct Route to Court, as she has claimed Domistic Violance.

How it works in law, is when she last allowed contact she had considered everything up to then, so the starting point in this case will be her reason for not wanting contact.

If this incident happened before contact last happened, she can not run with it.

Also, even if it did, it does not make him a risk to a child, but it would affect the arrangments for hand over.

How old is the child? Their wishes and desires might come into things. Once this is known, Ill advise on how to go forward on it.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#3
(03-06-2017, 08:22 PM)MarkR Wrote: He now has a Direct Route to Court, as she has claimed Domistic Violance.

How it works in law, is when she last allowed contact she had considered everything up to then, so the starting point in this case will be her reason for not wanting contact.

If this incident happened before contact last happened, she can not run with it.

Also, even if it did, it does not make him a risk to a child, but it would affect the arrangments for hand over.

How old is the child? Their wishes and desires might come into things. Once this is known, Ill advise on how to go forward on it.

He is 5 years old and is obsessed with his father. Which is why he is desperate to sort this out. Thank you very much for your speedy reply. We feel that his ex girlfriend has a new older partner and would like my housemate out of the picture. Now that she has claimed violence it has taken things 1 step too far. She claims that the violence happened before however he has had his son for weekend visits since the violence was supposed to have occurred.
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#4
(03-06-2017, 08:52 PM)bagelheaven Wrote:
(03-06-2017, 08:22 PM)MarkR Wrote: He now has a Direct Route to Court, as she has claimed Domistic Violance.

How it works in law, is when she last allowed contact she had considered everything up to then, so the starting point in this case will be her reason for not wanting contact.

If this incident happened before contact last happened, she can not run with it.

Also, even if it did, it does not make him a risk to a child, but it would affect the arrangments for hand over.

How old is the child? Their wishes and desires might come into things. Once this is known, Ill advise on how to go forward on it.

He is 5 years old and is obsessed with his father. Which is why he is desperate to sort this out. Thank you very much for your speedy reply. We feel that his ex girlfriend has a new older partner and would like my housemate out of the picture. Now that she has claimed violence it has taken things 1 step too far. She claims that the violence happened before however he has had his son for weekend visits since the violence was supposed to have occurred.

The changes to legal aid mean she can only get it if she claims Domistic Violance. This is resulting in a number of false claims.

Her Legal Aid will carry on if she is granted a None Molestation Order.

If there is an out of court undertanking, it will stop, as the application has reached an outcome where she no longer needs protection from the court unless its beached.

If it does not run on Merit, then her legal aid stops.

The fact the child is 5 means his wishes and desires can not come into it, however assumptions are made at that age that the child needs quality time with both parents, and only a Child Welfare/Protection Issue would change that.

State in the application that this claim is historical, and has been brought to late after the allegeged time, for him to be able to disprove it.
Also state that the alligation says it happned on xxxx  and that unsupervied contact took place on xxxx , meaning its not a valid reason now for contact to stop.

The very least a court would award in this situation would be Friday till Sunday, every 2 weeks and up to half school holidays, if he asks.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#5
Thank you for your reply. 

We hope to have this resolved as peacefully as possible. He is very worried that with these claims it could tarnish his chances. So he will need to wait for the court date now then? I was hoping there was any quicker was to get this sorted as hes spend half a year paying legal fees and getting nowhere
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