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About to apply for residency - Shall I move out with my daughter?
#11
(03-20-2017, 09:20 AM)LTCDAD Wrote: Hey,
The courts should be on the child's side....  and the default position should be to ensure both parents are able have custody, access and financial responsibility for the kid.

That's funny... not!
Because the courts should be on the child's side but if it was my wife to move out with my daughter, would a judge order the child to be returned?

Talking about financial responsibility where do we stand?
On one side I've been working hard to support the whole thing, on the other side she's doing nothing and not even understanding she's also financially responsible... what will a court say about that? Will they just ignore it as long as benefits will cover it (I'm just guessing I don't even know if benefits will cover the whole thing)?
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#12
I agree, its not perfect ... far from it
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#13
This is not looking good...

Told my wife yesterday my intention to go ahead and that we should agree a 50/50 shared care: she said it would be OK for her and even said she would like to move out from the property we live in.

This afternoon I was just about to leave from work and all of a sudden got a bunch of threatening text messages like: "you will end up alone without your daughter even if we have to all die!", "I can go to prison or to the morgue but you will not have her" etc...
I was 1h from home and just about to call the police and send them there...
Dozens of texts, all same type...
When I finally got home my wife was sleeping in her room, door closed, and my daughter was on her own on the sofa watching TV...

What shall I do?
This is insane.
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#14
(03-23-2017, 10:55 PM)mcnl Wrote: This is not looking good...

Told my wife yesterday my intention to go ahead and that we should agree a 50/50 shared care: she said it would be OK for her and even said she would like to move out from the property we live in.

This afternoon I was just about to leave from work and all of a sudden got a bunch of threatening text messages like: "you will end up alone without your daughter even if we have to all die!", "I can go to prison or to the morgue but you will not have her" etc...
I was 1h from home and just about to call the police and send them there...
Dozens of texts, all same type...
When I finally got home my wife was sleeping in her room, door closed, and my daughter was on her own on the sofa watching TV...

What shall I do?
This is insane.

To to your local Court, and ask for an Urgent Ex Party Hearing for a None Molestation Orde, requiring her to move out, and a Child Arrangments Order.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#15
(03-24-2017, 04:51 AM)MarkR Wrote:
(03-23-2017, 10:55 PM)mcnl Wrote: This is not looking good...

Told my wife yesterday my intention to go ahead and that we should agree a 50/50 shared care: she said it would be OK for her and even said she would like to move out from the property we live in.

This afternoon I was just about to leave from work and all of a sudden got a bunch of threatening text messages like: "you will end up alone without your daughter even if we have to all die!", "I can go to prison or to the morgue but you will not have her" etc...
I was 1h from home and just about to call the police and send them there...
Dozens of texts, all same type...
When I finally got home my wife was sleeping in her room, door closed, and my daughter was on her own on the sofa watching TV...

What shall I do?
This is insane.

To to your local Court, and ask for an Urgent Ex Party Hearing for a None Molestation Orde, requiring her to move out, and a Child Arrangments Order.

I haven't done anything yet, apart from ensuring my daughter is not left alone with her, for 2 main reasons: 1st one is my wife agreed on a 50/50 shared care and even asked me to instruct the solicitor to make the Child Arrangements Order ready and 2nd one is my hope to get things sorted as amicably as possible without conflicts.

Now that I have the Child Arrangements Order ready for her to sign she's saying she has an appointment with Citizens Advice Bureau next week and will not do anything until then, on the other hand I'm traveling with my daughter on Sunday for a week so will only be back after her meeting.

Now my question is: if, after her meeting, she changes her mind again and decides she doesn't agree any more on the 50/50, shall I go ahead with this non-molestation order, requiring her to move out and a Child Arrangements Order?
What sort of Child Arrangements Order can I expect in a situation like that?
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#16
(03-30-2017, 07:24 AM)mcnl Wrote:
(03-24-2017, 04:51 AM)MarkR Wrote:
(03-23-2017, 10:55 PM)mcnl Wrote: This is not looking good...

Told my wife yesterday my intention to go ahead and that we should agree a 50/50 shared care: she said it would be OK for her and even said she would like to move out from the property we live in.

This afternoon I was just about to leave from work and all of a sudden got a bunch of threatening text messages like: "you will end up alone without your daughter even if we have to all die!", "I can go to prison or to the morgue but you will not have her" etc...
I was 1h from home and just about to call the police and send them there...
Dozens of texts, all same type...
When I finally got home my wife was sleeping in her room, door closed, and my daughter was on her own on the sofa watching TV...

What shall I do?
This is insane.

To to your local Court, and ask for an Urgent Ex Party Hearing for a None Molestation Orde, requiring her to move out, and a Child Arrangments Order.

I haven't done anything yet, apart from ensuring my daughter is not left alone with her, for 2 main reasons: 1st one is my wife agreed on a 50/50 shared care and even asked me to instruct the solicitor to make the Child Arrangements Order ready and 2nd one is my hope to get things sorted as amicably as possible without conflicts.

Now that I have the Child Arrangements Order ready for her to sign she's saying she has an appointment with Citizens Advice Bureau next week and will not do anything until then, on the other hand I'm traveling with my daughter on Sunday for a week so will only be back after her meeting.

Now my question is: if, after her meeting, she changes her mind again and decides she doesn't agree any more on the 50/50, shall I go ahead with this non-molestation order, requiring her to move out and a Child Arrangements Order?
What sort of Child Arrangements Order can I expect in a situation like that?

If you get a None Molestation Order, that normaly makes shared care not workable, as there is to many handovers etc.

In that situation, one of you would be the Resident Parnet, and the other would get contact along the lines of Friday till Sunday every 2 weeks, and up to half school holidays, perhaps with some indirect contact (telephone or Social Media).
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
Reply
#17
(03-30-2017, 08:22 AM)MarkR Wrote:
(03-30-2017, 07:24 AM)mcnl Wrote:
(03-24-2017, 04:51 AM)MarkR Wrote:
(03-23-2017, 10:55 PM)mcnl Wrote: This is not looking good...

Told my wife yesterday my intention to go ahead and that we should agree a 50/50 shared care: she said it would be OK for her and even said she would like to move out from the property we live in.

This afternoon I was just about to leave from work and all of a sudden got a bunch of threatening text messages like: "you will end up alone without your daughter even if we have to all die!", "I can go to prison or to the morgue but you will not have her" etc...
I was 1h from home and just about to call the police and send them there...
Dozens of texts, all same type...
When I finally got home my wife was sleeping in her room, door closed, and my daughter was on her own on the sofa watching TV...

What shall I do?
This is insane.

To to your local Court, and ask for an Urgent Ex Party Hearing for a None Molestation Orde, requiring her to move out, and a Child Arrangments Order.

I haven't done anything yet, apart from ensuring my daughter is not left alone with her, for 2 main reasons: 1st one is my wife agreed on a 50/50 shared care and even asked me to instruct the solicitor to make the Child Arrangements Order ready and 2nd one is my hope to get things sorted as amicably as possible without conflicts.

Now that I have the Child Arrangements Order ready for her to sign she's saying she has an appointment with Citizens Advice Bureau next week and will not do anything until then, on the other hand I'm traveling with my daughter on Sunday for a week so will only be back after her meeting.

Now my question is: if, after her meeting, she changes her mind again and decides she doesn't agree any more on the 50/50, shall I go ahead with this non-molestation order, requiring her to move out and a Child Arrangements Order?
What sort of Child Arrangements Order can I expect in a situation like that?

If you get a None Molestation Order, that normaly makes shared care not workable, as there is to many handovers etc.

In that situation, one of you would be the Resident Parnet, and the other would get contact along the lines of Friday till Sunday every 2 weeks, and up to half school holidays, perhaps with some indirect contact (telephone or Social Media).

Looking at the facts, who do you believe would become the resident parent in that situation?
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#18
This might be helpful for someone else in the future we never know, so in such a situation according to my solicitor the right procedure would be to apply at the same time for:
- An Occupation Order seeking for my wife to move out
- A Prohibited Steps Order to prevent her from removing the child from my care/the nursery
- An Order for my daughter to live with me offering mum time with her, initially supervised until we are sure she changed her behavior and the contact is safe for my daughter

I'm not sure yet how I will proceed, as some of you might have understood I've been trying hard to sort things out by amicable agreements and to avoid entering "nasty" court battles, but it looks like, if she sticks to that sort of behavior, I will not be left with many options...
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