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Advice on childcare please
#1
My ex and I have a court order whereby the children stay with me Monday and Friday nights and the rest of the week with her.

Until now I was able to pick up the children from school everyday at 3pm and bring them to my place, and then she would pick them up when she finished work at 6.

However, I can no longer leave work early. I have suggested that I will arrange for the children to be picked up on Monday and Fridays from school and that she does her own arrangement on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursdays. 
Unfortunately she threw a fit, saying it is my responsibility to arrange and pay for this as we agreed I would do it in court. I have looked at the court order and there is nothing in it about who picks up the children, only about specific overnights.

Is she right or is it her responsibility to arrange for childcare the days they stay with her? I think my offer was a fair one. 

By the way, I pay her child maintenance.

Thanks
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#2
(04-18-2017, 09:12 AM)miker_71uk Wrote: My ex and I have a court order whereby the children stay with me Monday and Friday nights and the rest of the week with her.

Until now I was able to pick up the children from school everyday at 3pm and bring them to my place, and then she would pick them up when she finished work at 6.

However, I can no longer leave work early. I have suggested that I will arrange for the children to be picked up on Monday and Fridays from school and that she does her own arrangement on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursdays. 
Unfortunately she threw a fit, saying it is my responsibility to arrange and pay for this as we agreed I would do it in court. I have looked at the court order and there is nothing in it about who picks up the children, only about specific overnights.

Is she right or is it her responsibility to arrange for childcare the days they stay with her? I think my offer was a fair one. 

By the way, I pay her child maintenance.

Thanks

How things stand in law, is your ex has to pay all normal day to day costs, except for when the child is with you.

Is there an after school club the children could go to?

In terms of costs, the law is clear on this. Its up to your ex, as the person who gets Child Benefit to pay for child care, and its also illigal to pay anyone except a Resistered Child Minder or Ofstead Aproved Company (what an afterschool club would be) for more than 14 days per year.

If the law of the country says she needs help with the cost of it, then she can apply for the childcare part of Working Tax Credit. She (and if there is a new partner them also) need to work at least 16 hours per week. They pay 70% of the costs. Note that other welfare benefits move the applicable amount when people work, so in real terms, she might not be paying the 30%, she might be getting some of it by other ways.

As your order is very vague I would look at going back to Court to get this updated. Are you ok about the fact that you do not get every other weekend and do you not get any school holiday time? My surggestion would be to apply for a variation, to cover transprort arrangements and clear start and end times and perhaps change your arrangments if your not getting enough quality time (weekend and school holidays) etc.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#3
Hi Mark.

The court order is exactly as follows (which I copy and paste):

• The children shall live with both parents as follows:-
• Week 1 – The Children shall live with the father on Monday, Friday and Saturday (including overnights) and with the mother on all other days.
• Week 2 – The Children shall live with the father on Monday and Friday (including overnight) and with the mother on all other days.
• On any such additional dates and times as may be agreed between the parents.
• The Children shall spend half of the school holidays with each parent.

As you can see, there is nothing about me picking them up from school on a daily basis. My job does not allow me anymore to do so. There are after school clubs and a nursery where they pick thee kids so she can pick them up from there after work. But the problem is she does not want to pay for it and thinks it is my duty to do so.
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#4
(04-18-2017, 10:33 AM)miker_71uk Wrote: Hi Mark.

The court order is exactly as follows (which I copy and paste):

• The children shall live with both parents as follows:-
• Week 1 – The Children shall live with the father on Monday, Friday and Saturday  (including overnights) and with the mother on all other days.
• Week 2 – The Children shall live with the father on Monday and Friday (including overnight) and with the mother on all other days.
• On any such additional dates and times as may be agreed between the parents.
• The Children shall spend half of the school holidays with each parent.

As you can see, there is nothing about me picking them up from school on a daily basis. My job does not allow me anymore to do so. There are after school clubs and a nursery where they pick thee kids so she can pick them up from there after work. But the problem is she does not want to pay for it and thinks it is my duty to do so.

The only person with provision for getting help with Child Care costs is her, as she gets Child Benefit. Under UK law, your Child Support payment is fully inclusive and your only other costs, start from when you collect the child, and end when you take them back to a location of her choice.  Any fees payable at where the collection is from, is down to your ex, as she is that child care providers customer. Where the children get returned to, is in the control of your ex, and as such if any fees are payable, its down to her to arrangment payment.

Link to Working Tax Credits, https://www.gov.uk/help-with-childcare-c...ax-credits 
Qualification to claims this, is Child Benefit.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#5
Thanks Mark.

Her solicitor's advice to my ex via email, forwarded to me just now is as follows:

"You just have to say you can’t collect them so he has to make arrangements."

What is the solicitor on about?
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#6
(04-18-2017, 11:45 AM)miker_71uk Wrote: Thanks Mark.

Her solicitor's advice to my ex via email, forwarded to me just now is as follows:

"You just have to say you can’t collect them so he has to make arrangements."

What is the solicitor on about?

I would collect them today, but telephone your local court for an appointment to make an Urgent Ex Party Applicaiton tomorrow morning (or this afternoon).

State to them that your ex is the Resident Parent, as far as Child Beneit is concerned but is refusing to collect the children from school on her days.
To prevent the children in effect being picked up by the local authrority and taking into emergancy care from school as she will not do it, your need a variation to the child arrangments order, putting the children in your care, until she can is willing to carry out her responablitys by arranging child care outside of your time.

Also state that should the children live with her, that your seeking a variation of the order, due to your work comitments.

As that Order will make you the Resident Parent, your work under employment law should give you time off or let you finsh early etc, to pick the children up short term, until you can get alternative arragements in place.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#7
Thanks Mark.
There is no issue until May. She is off work until May and my afternoon duties do not start until May either.

I will respond to her solicitor stating clearly that it is Samira's responsibility to pick up the children on days they are with her otherwise she will have neglected them.

Do you think this is a better approach than an all out war involving the courts?
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#8
(04-18-2017, 12:33 PM)miker_71uk Wrote: Thanks Mark.
There is no issue until May. She is off work until May and my afternoon duties do not start until May either.

I will respond to her solicitor stating clearly that it is Samira's responsibility to pick up the children on days they are with her otherwise she will have neglected them.

Do you think this is a better approach than an all out war involving the courts?

You need to go via Courts in this case, as you need the court now to set a time when your contact time starts.

If a variation of the Court Order puts the children in your care from say 5pm, then its up to her to arrange their collection from school.

Contact is about the avalaiblity of the non Resident Parent (in terms of the one who does not get Child Benefit), so you have your reason to get the order changed as your work hours have.

She might make a case that your change does not give you a lot of time with the child, but should that happen then you might have to change it to be Friday till Sunday every 2 weeks, up to half school holidays and indirect contact (telephone/social media) in the week.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#9
To be honest I can agree with my job to work flexibly on Monday and Fridays but I can't do it everyday. I will still pick them up on Mondays and Fridays. The rest of the time she should. At my kids' school there are many children who are picked up by a nursery staff and taken to nursery until their parents pick them up after 5. This is quite normal.

She just doesn't want to pay for this. That's all.
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#10
Mark,
She just picked up the kids and said we might have to court again because in court my entire case was based on the fact that my job is flexible and I can pick up the children. I said fine, go ahead.

Actually my job is still flexible. I can pick up the children two days a week, which is Monday and Friday but not everyday.

In court we agreed Monday and Fridays between us and took the question of an extra night (Tuesdays) to the judge. I wanted Tuesdays too she wouldn't let me.

Is it really likely that the court will change the status quo order and give the kids to her with me getting them every other weekend just because she doesn't want to pay for childcare on the days she is responsible for them?
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