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Maternal Family
#1
Does anybody else get huge pangs of discomfort, jealousy and anger knowing your son or daughter spends the majority of the time with a bunch of people you don't trust or like?

I'm sending myself scatty at the minute thinking how unfair it is that my ex's mother (who I sodding despise) basically gets to spend all her time with my son whereas I barely see him. It terrifies me that he'll have more an attachment to her than me.

Absolutely rough times at the minute...
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#2
It drives me absolutely bonkers
The opinions here are not that of Separated Dads, but merely a loving father who has been through the process and has come out the other side.
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#3
Yeah the family of my ex are all inbred freaks who spend so much time playing the benefits game to avoid work that if they put that much energy into actual work they would at least be somewhere up the normal scale of humanity rather than the bottom feeders of society.
 
Anyway I digress Smile for the reasons above I hate the idea that these lowlifes will potentially influence my children’s views on all aspects of life but especially work. The way I deal with it is to try and put them out of my thoughts and concentrate on showing my children a better path, showing them all the cool things you can do if you work hard etc. Hopefully doing this will help them make their own minds up as they grow older because me and my family NEVER make promises we cant keep, always do fun things, and never let them down and those things go a long way for kids
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#4
Glad I'm not the only one then. (Not that I want you dads to suffer any more mind!) Smile

My little one is still a baby so I worry about my ex's family imprinting on him as he develops. They're a rotten lot - especially the ex's mother who I actively loathe - so it drives me bananas. Struggling to find things to distract me at the minute.
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#5
Kids get lots of influence from all sources. parents, siblings, in-laws, relatives, teachers, friends

Some might say the more the better but if one person is overly imprinting that can be bad

Think of it this way, she raised a girl who you fell in love with and had a child with - no matter how the relationship is now... she must be an 'OK' mum

The other way to look at it is "any family that makes your own look normal should be given some credit" :-)
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#6
(05-11-2017, 11:27 AM)LTCDAD Wrote: Kids get lots of influence from all sources. parents, siblings, in-laws, relatives, teachers, friends

Some might say the more the better but if one person is overly imprinting that can be bad

Think of it this way, she raised a girl who you fell in love with and had a child with - no matter how the relationship is now... she must be an 'OK' mum

The other way to look at it is "any family that makes your own look normal should be given some credit" :-)

Makes sense but the ex's mother makes my skin crawl. I can't help but find her abhorrent and get paranoid about her being around my son.

Actually, there was a thread on here about what exes have said to dads and one of them I've started to bear in mind when dealing with my ex and her parents: 'two wrongs don't make a right - take your parents as an example'. Right out of the top drawer that one, and is cheering me up no end when I apply it to my situation.

Smile
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#7
We have not yet separated "fully", and I'm still living in our house. But when I was away for 3 weeks while social services was involved, my mother in law increased her time. And my sons behaviour at nursery then worsened. Now funny that isn't it.

Maybe it isn't because I'm not disciplining him enough? It drives me bonkers, as I really believe that her way is utterly wrong for him, and my mother in law is applying the same method that made her own son leave home at 17.

My wife does not see this...
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