Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Ex-Wife Refusing Access
#1
Hi All,

This is my first post on this forum. I’ve found it very useful in the past, but like most situations; my story has its own circumstances that I have not been able to find a definitive answer to. I’m not going to bore you with fine detail but an overview is probably necessary.
 
I’ve been divorced for 7yrs and have a 13yr old daughter with my Ex. When we got divorced we agreed to have dual custody and I have always had my daughter stay 3 nights a week. I have always paid child maintenance for the extra day that my ex has her as well. Both of us are now in long term relationships and also have children with our new partners.
 
My Ex has recently stopped my daughter coming over during the week on my agreed days. I won’t get into the nitty-gritty, but if it is relevant, then I am happy to give more detail in another post. Suffice as to say, there is no issue with my daughters welfare when in my care. It is simply down to my Ex wife and me having different parenting methods.
 
Basically, I want to know what rights I have from a legal standpoint as this is all my Ex will seemingly respond to. Is she allowed to refuse to let my daughter stay on my days considering we have dual custody?
 
Is there any legislation I can direct her to that backs me up? Or any websites that I can send her links to? I don’t want to withhold my maintenance payments as I want to do things by the book but are there grounds to do this? My Ex will definitely respond to my requests if it meant she wasn’t getting her holiday fund maintenance payment every month (sarcasm intended)! Wink
 
I’m sure if I can show her that what she is doing is not legal then things will go back to normal and there would be no need to actually go down the legal route as this would put even more strain on an already fragile relationship.
 
Many Thanks
Reply
#2
Have you got a court order? or just agreed the 3 nights a week yourselves?

If court order she is in breach so you can apply to enforce... if its family agreement you may struggle but you can go to court to get it formalized

If the daughter stays an extra night at hers, the ex could apply to CMS and get more money off you (i assume you have a family agreement for the maintenance) and i assume that the ex has looked at the calculator and realized 4 nights a week at hers is not as good as 5 nights in terms of what you will have to contribute to the holiday fund ;-)

What does your daughter think?
Reply
#3
Reading between the lines but I am guessing you have an informal arrangement, so if I was you I would send her an email that politely requests that she returns the arrangement that has been happening for X amount of years, and if she refuses then you will seek an order via the courts.

If there is no genuine reason for her stopping access other than a disagreement on how something is done which doesn’t come with any risks the courts would care about, then the fact she has set a president in allowing your access of 3nights the courts are highly likely to rule in your favour and make the arrangement legal.

Your need to offer her mediation first, but I’d recommend getting an order in place because it stops (or at least makes it harder) for this sort of stuff to happen again down the line.
Reply
#4
Thanks for the replies. Sorry for the delay replying.

I have suggested mediation before, but my Ex was less than enthusiastic. Nothing has changed since my original post and I am still only getting to see my daughter 1 day a week. I'm beginning to think my only course of action is court.

Thanks for the information as well. I do have an informal arrangement for access and maintenance payments so maybe it would be worth getting this formalised.

LTCDAD: My daughter, unfortunately, is quite impressionable and I suspect my Ex is trying to turn her against my new partner. This is all speculation but she has definitely changed in the last few weeks. She tends to go with the flow and is not outspoken enough to confront her mum and tell her she wants to see us all 3 days. She just goes along with what her mum says which is why we are where we are.

I will continue to plug away and try to sort this all out without the need for courts. At least based on what you have said, I'm likely to be granted the same access as I 'am supposed to' have now if I did go to court.

Thanks again. Fingers Crossed!
Reply
#5
(06-15-2017, 09:11 AM)Nulladave Wrote: Thanks for the replies. Sorry for the delay replying.

I have suggested mediation before, but my Ex was less than enthusiastic. Nothing has changed since my original post and I am still only getting to see my daughter 1 day a week. I'm beginning to think my only course of action is court.

Thanks for the information as well. I do have an informal arrangement for access and maintenance payments so maybe it would be worth getting this formalised.

Fingers Crossed!

You do not need to request mediation yourself, you need to get to a mediator and request they sign you off for court because of XY&Z. If they agree great, if not they will contact your ex and if she doesn’t agree to it than your get signed off for court.
 
I know costs are involved but please do not delay if possible, you wont ever get this time back so the sooner you start the sooner you can see your children again. Good luck
Reply


Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Grandparent one parent refusing access ukchris2013 4 4,093 11-25-2019, 07:55 AM
Last Post: MarkR
  Wife Leaving with kids with no access luckyg 18 15,996 08-29-2018, 03:32 PM
Last Post: luckyg
  Wife's access to the house zpbaluk 3 4,922 07-06-2017, 09:13 AM
Last Post: miker_71uk
  ex wife refusing access and refusing to talk Rickyspanish12 2 5,411 06-15-2017, 06:57 PM
Last Post: MarkR
  Ex wife restricting access to our kids. xphatman1x 1 4,137 01-14-2017, 08:23 PM
Last Post: MarkR
  Ex-wife refusing to share travel arrangements - who is right? William 6 17,888 12-06-2016, 07:21 PM
Last Post: William
  Ex wife puts access conditions in place jurijsl 1 4,115 05-02-2016, 12:19 AM
Last Post: MarkR



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)