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DV
#11
I had the following

Emotional Abuse
Financial Abuse
Psychological Abuse
Sexual Abuse (I wouldnt sleep with her! Nawwww never - we were splitting up FFS!!)

She had never mentioned any of this to me, and she had the personal mobile phone numbers of a lot of Police personnel, so its not like she was being kept from them at any point or not told she cant talk to them.

My case has gone from Dispute Resolution to Final Hearing, it didnt even get Fact Finding.
The opinions here are not that of Separated Dads, but merely a loving father who has been through the process and has come out the other side.
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#12
(06-20-2017, 01:34 PM)invisibleintellectual Wrote: I had the following

Emotional Abuse
Financial Abuse
Psychological Abuse
Sexual Abuse (I wouldnt sleep with her!  Nawwww never - we were splitting up FFS!!)

She had never mentioned any of this to me, and she had the personal mobile phone numbers of a lot of Police personnel, so its not like she was being kept from them at any point or not told she cant talk to them.

My case has gone from Dispute Resolution to Final Hearing, it didnt even get Fact Finding.

Amazing how virtually every dad is levelled with the same accusation.

At my last hearing it was agreed by all parties and the magistrates that the Dispute Resolution hearing coming up will be the final hearing. I'm taking that as a positive in that her bullshit is not being taken seriously.
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#13
I had her barrister rock up to me and ask if I would drop the case and just take the CAFCASS recommendation - needless to say the answer was a definite no - so hence why its not final hearing.
The opinions here are not that of Separated Dads, but merely a loving father who has been through the process and has come out the other side.
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#14
When I represented myself at the variation hearing my ex’s solicitor asked to speak to me privately and said “I am here to find agreement rather than argue opinions, so if we can review each point and see if any arrangement can be made it will look good on you both in front of the magistrates”.
 
Call me naïve but I thought that sounded reasonable and sensible until she started saying in a very dominant way leading sentences like “as you do ABC my client has offered a more then generous XYZ”….. when I attempted to explain why XYZ wasn’t generous or based on fact I was immediately shot down and told she wasn’t here to argue opinion despite the fact she had tried to lead the statement in an opinionated way that favoured her client!!
 
Thankfully I am not bullied easily so instantly closed up choosing to say only “sorry but as you are unwilling to let me speak unless I agree without question, which would also make the assumption I agree with your client’s perspective, which I do not, I am unwilling to proceed with this meeting”. I got told bluntly that refusing to negotiate with her would look bad on me and she was trying to do me a favour, but the reality was in the court I was given the opportunity to speak and that led me to show her client was a liar which went massively in my favour and they looked foolish.
 
The irony was IF the solicitor had not spoken to me so poorly she would have found out a lot of this stuff and sadly for me could have prepared herself for the truth rather than sit there looking stunned as her clients lies were laid bare for all to see.
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#15
I'm not at that point yet but to be honest I can't wait to stand up in court and say my piece.

One of the points I'm particularly looking forward to refuting is her claim that me buoyantly cheering a goal scored while watching the football on a Sunday afternoon constitutes emotional abuse towards her and my son. Apparently I was being threatening towards her and the kids. My light-hearted cheer of 'yes!' when my team scored presumably must make up part of her accusation of DV.

I'm not even joking...
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#16
Be careful. I got my fingers burned quite badly and now have an undeserved conviction for dv. http://www.separateddads.co.uk/forum/thread-3547.html
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