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Directions hearing and CAFCAS
#1
Hi all I would appreciate some thoughts on this matter.

5 weeks ago my ex just before pick up stated that a wallet I left under pram week before had just been picked up by my 16 month old son
and he pulled out a bag of white powder, and was playing with it I immediately didn't believe her as I am anti drugs, and new as she had been trying to stop my contact previously by stating harassment but police stated I was doing nothing wrong enquiring about my child.
I told her why didn't she take my child to hospital and take drugs to police I informed her I had , had enough and I want either mediation or we go to court it was after this that she made the allegations to the police who closed the file do to no evidence and social services logged it but said they have no concerns.

it has now been 5 weeks since this incident and I have just received my court date and information that cafcas will do report now I have never been arrested or been in trouble with police but on a bad day 10 years ago I did self harm after loosing my mum my ex knows about this but still allowed me access to child overnight every weekend.
my ex called me when she received papers and is now changing her story to my baby was playing with wallet and she took it off him and went through it and found the made up bag of drugs.

if she says this will the courts and cafcas listen to her and stop me having the custody iv applied for im scared they will ignore the police report stating closed due to no evidence and the social service report saying no concern.
I told ex I will take drug test to prove her lies but she is now saying she doesn't believe I do drugs but I put it there
she is also saying she is not stopping me from seeing son when we go court but it will be on her terms and in contact centre something she has tried to do for months to continue controlling my access.

what do I do in court when she continues these false allegations and tells these made up lies to cafcas as I have applied for intrem contact also. any advice will be welcome

I also forgot to add I have 3 statements from her one in October stating im a good dad one in February stating im a good dad and she appreciates all I do for us to remain friends and one in june a week before this false allegation stating she hates me and everything about me but I am a good dad I also have messages of her stating if I don't agree to terms she says she will stop access and we will have to go to contact centre earlier in the year something she has said multiple times to get me to see my child less and less
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#2
You need to put your mind to rest. Social Services have investigated and have no concerns. The police have decided to tale NFA (no further action) and that's an end of the matter.

Once CAFCASS are involved they will do a check of your background and if there were no charges (and not even a caution) they'll state that they have no concerns. Even if there was drugs involved, you'd go on a program, maybe get tested but in the end you'd have unfettered access to your children. CAFCASS and the courts have heard it all before and they hear it every day. If you don't believe that, do a search for 'CAFCASS' on this site. Many of us gave been accused of domestic violence, drugs, alcohol, neglect. It will go nowhere. Similarly your self harm ten years ago will be of no interest to them.

You'll have a CAFCASS interview (by phone) focus on that. Never slag off the ex, stay child focused and always talk in terms of the children, "I think it would be best for the children....".

Really, you have nothing to worry about. My case? Accused of DV, arrested, released the same night. No charges. NFA, not even a caution - which I would not have accepted; didn't help her case she went out and hit someone in the same time period proving the point I made under interview which was she was habitually violent and I had to fight her off from time to time! All of that had no effect at all on my case. Ex also alleged I sexually assaulted her. Of course she never reported that to the police and nothing ever came of it; because it wasn't true - but I'm sure the judge pretty soon worked out the ex was a non stop liar. Like I said, the courts and CAFCASS have heard it all before.
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#3
thankyou for your reply iv just been terrified things will be biased in her favour iv had my child every weekend since he was 6 months old im not asking for unreasonable things just that the previous contact we arranged with each other be re-introduced, I miss my child and feel she is doing all this to try control my life, things seem to get worse when my twin boys with my new partner were born at only 24 weeks old on the 20th of may but I still picked up my son to keep his routine, and even wen one of my twins past away on fri 26th of may and I was grieving I still made sure I was there at pick up time the next day to keep my sons stability her controlling ways and lies have just turned me into a mess worrying people will believe her but thankyou for putting my mind at ease abit
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#4
I'm sorry about the loss of your baby. I too have twins so I know how that has to hurt.

We're dads, we'll do anything for out children - whatever women think we'd go all out for our kids. I know that as I've done it - peeing blood the night before contact and warned that I had to go to A&E as that was a possible sign of a couple of cancers. I too turned up to contact and didn't turn up to hospital till past 9pm the next day.

You need to look after you, your partner and all your children and not worry about the hearing. First things first, concentrate on CAFCASS

But honestly, you have nothing to worry about.
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#5
thank you so much, feeling a lot less stressed
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#6
Welcome!
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#7
just been informed case moved to my local county court and will be seen by a distract judge at directions hearing is this good or bad?
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#8
It's_very_good.

The alternative is the less powerful and not legally trained magistrates bench. You want a judge who is by definition a lawyer with many years experience. Been before both a Bench and a Judge and I'd choose the latter every time!
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#9
Always remain calm when speaking to cafcass and in court. I found answering allegations and proving your innocence is a waste of time. SS has no concerns and nor have the Police so that says it all. All courts will do now is arrange contact at set times that's after they give you and ex partner the chance to do so. If you cant come to an arrangement with their help and guidance they will end up making decision for you.
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#10
cheers for replies, will be almost 11 weeks when court starts withought any communication or contact and that includes to communicating wit a family member about my son I have taken all steps to try keep his stability, surely court will c as complete stop of communication and contact that she has done too a young child who is used to staying at his fathers weekly as not in his best interests, and she will get some sort of reprimand for not doing what is best for him, after all she has saif and done I harbour no hate towards her and would gladly communicate for the best of my child as I believe it is defo best who have two parents that get on, but that has never worked as typical reply I get is im the mother I make the rules so u do what I say or don't see him that's why I offerd mediation so many times but she always refused I just want it all over with now and to see my son again.
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