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Advice needed for dealing with ex's new partner
#1
Hello everyone,

I am just after some advice here and was hoping someone here can help.

Basically I am now mostly been contacting my daughter's mother only through her boyfriend of 6 months now. And I find it weird and uncomfortable doing this and I don't know what I can do about it. I don't know him, or know if i can trust him, he claims to be a psychic and makes a living out of that, and he's parroting what past partners have had issues with me (usually money related, yet I pay more than I should according to the .gov website calculator and not missed one payment ever).

To be clear - I have no desire to be back with her at all. I am not jealous of this guy. Indeed I almost feel sorry for him because I get the impression he's been fed her side of the story, believed it all, and is all loved up too. I feel he's playing the white knight against me, the tight-fisted counterpart.

Slowly he's been trying to discuss more and more things with me, money for school uniform for example while the mother is nowhere to be seen and I am getting increasingly uncomfortable about it.

I was wondering if anyone here is going through or has had a similar issue and what you guys thought about it? Am I right to be uneasy about this? Is there any process/rights I should be aware of?

Any help would be greatly appreciated

monkeyroboninjax
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#2
(07-28-2017, 05:49 PM)monkeyroboninjax Wrote: Hello everyone,

I am just after some advice here and was hoping someone here can help.

Basically I am now mostly been contacting my daughter's mother only through her boyfriend of 6 months now. And I find it weird and uncomfortable doing this and I don't know what I can do about it. I don't know him, or know if i can trust him, he claims to be a psychic and makes a living out of that, and he's parroting what past partners have had issues with me (usually money related, yet I pay more than I should according to the .gov website calculator and not missed one payment ever).

To be clear - I have no desire to be back with her at all. I am not jealous of this guy. Indeed I almost feel sorry for him because I get the impression he's been fed her side of the story, believed it all, and is all loved up too. I feel he's playing the white knight against me, the tight-fisted counterpart.

Slowly he's been trying to discuss more and more things with me, money for school uniform for example while the mother is nowhere to be seen and I am getting increasingly uncomfortable about it.

I was wondering if anyone here is going through or has had a similar issue and what you guys thought about it? Am I right to be uneasy about this? Is there any process/rights I should be aware of?

Any help would be greatly appreciated

monkeyroboninjax

I would send a letter to your ex, pointing out that you both are the childs parents, and that you are no longer willing to comunicate with him regarding anything to do with the child, or the money side of things.

You might want to also say that the way how how the Welfare Benefit System works now, is it assumes that the Resident Parent has at least what the law says coming in, considering their current household members. Child Benefit and Child Support is not considered as income for any benefits/Tax Credits she might be getting.

The Child Support system looks at your ability to pay, and it does create a reduation to allow for your costs of having contact, while she gets the same benefits/tax credits every week.

In a CMS case your payment is considered in law to be a fair contrubution towards her costs. Get in the fact your paying more than that, and that if requests for more keep coming, you will pay the £20 to open a CMS case, and not pay a penny more than what they say.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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