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Division of home - and Occupation order
#1
First.  I do have assistance from solicitors, but I still have make the call.

My story is in in a different thread, but to summarise.
I was accused for domestic violence on the 20th April by my wife, for pushing her and shaking my daughter. Complete nonsense, but I was arrested, but let go free of all charges. Social services involved, and I was 3 weeks away from the family home, before I returned.  That quickly turned hellish, as my MIL came 630 in the morning and left 2230 in the evening. Sabotaging contact and care for my young children.  The police were called numerous times at occasions where I tried to take my son to the playground. Sometimes it was OK, but mostly not.  Always ending up with giving in, as someone has to, and my wife certainly would not.

Adding to that my wife cancelled all direct debits, closed her account which was our savings (payment for expenses), a system we have had going for years. Basically I paid everything I could to her account, and most direct debits were on this "savings" account. But in her sole name.
Hey..I trusted her.

Demands started in selling the house, and how we are to split it, me trying to get these discussions done amicably with mediator, which failed in itself. There were ongoing accusations that I had stolen the children's money, to sums that doens't add up at all, complete nonsese, but very, very aggressive, and typically every morning and evening. With my 4 year old son repeating this accusations and swear words.  It was quite clear to me that my MIL was trying to trick me so I would "loose it" and be violent.  I never did, but I called the police a couple of times as I was not able to calm things down on my own.  As soon as the police was gone, the same would repeat.

On the 9th June in the morning it got really bad, and I called in the police again. I was absolutely desperate, just begging them for help. Social Services did nothing to help us, and only made things worse.  The police came, and basically spent most of the day at our house while I was at work, hoping to find some compromises. I have been fairly happy with the police officers, and it tended to be the same ones coming again.  I know them all by name...

When I came back home that evening they were all gone!  Taken all clothes, most of the food!
It sort of became clear that she had taken them all (4 children...) to her parents house, which is just 500 metres away from our home.
She came back with the police as escort the day after to take her car ( I'm now carless), and some further belongings.  Declaring via the police that she no longer lived at our house?

She agreed to meet me at the playground for 2 hours on the 25th June for me to see the children.  I tried to arrange next access there, and she told me that it had to wait till the weekend.  That was the last time I saw them.

But now we have solicitors involved.  

For the financial side, my target was a clean break, and sell the house and divide in basis equally.  There is in theory enough equity to house both of us, but of course smaller house. (Unless it all get used up in legal costs).

But now she has change, and I'm not allowed to market the house, as she wants to buy me out, with the help of her parents.  Fair enough, it's just that I can't see how they can raise sufficient equity for my share, and take on the rather large mortgage that is on the property.  I pay everything to the matrimonial home now. (+ CMA)

There is also disagreement about the valuation of the home ( I have a copy of the valuation report she arranged).  That can be resolved though, with another independent valuation.

To top that, she wants me to move out in the interim voluntarily, and she will take on all the household bills (after cancelling them all), and half the mortgage.  

I'm worried that if she does, she will not progress with buying me out, so I am reluctant, as I can see that she would resist selling the house as soon as she is in, and then with the children there as well, then I'm stuffed.

But...if I don't move out voluntarily, she will apply for an occupation order. My solicitor has suggested that she has a reasonable chance of success.  Not so much because of the alleged abuse, but for the welfare of the children.

I'm questioning that a little, as although the situation is far from ideal, I don't think the children "suffer".  Also...she decided to leave.
But as I'm the bloke, I guess that doesn't help me much...

So brilliant!  

I'm in a loose, loose situation. And I did not want any of this to happen.  

Irony is that all the costs occurring now we would of course have been better off getting a full time nanny, but I'm not so sure that would have solved things.  I did actually try, but it was difficult, and my wife did not help...

I'm a mess...but I guess there will be some sort of solution.
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