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Haven't seen kids for 2 months
#1
Me and my wife seperated on 26th June when she called the police and made a false allegation of assualt. I was called for voluntary interview and while I was at the police station she changed the locks and asked for me to not return to the property. We lived in the rented accomodation and contract was on her name even though I always paid the rent and bills and everything else as she was staying home. We have 2 kids 4 years and 1 year old whom I have not seen since. She asked the police that I should not contact her. I am still to hear from police if there is any further action.
I went to a solicator who wrote her a letter proposing interim contact until further developments, which was for me to see the kids every 2 weeks over the weekend and 3 days a week Facetime contact. she replied saying that she was seeking legal advice. upom chasing her up she came back with an excuse that she was waiting for her legal aid. This letter was sent on 7th July. While waiting for some news I asked the solicator to recommend Mediation. I saw the mediator on 7th August and while we discussed that seeing kids was my only priority at initial mediation, my wife said she cannot make it any sooner as she is busy refurbishing the flat which is a rented property.... On the same day that Mediator saw me she called my wife and she agreed to see her the following week but I was never told which day. Then I chased her this week and I was told yeterday after 10 days waiting that she and my wife think mediation is not suitable.
I dont know what to do, part of me says to start legal proceedings but then I fear of instigating things and then quite possibly taking them to a point of no return. She wouldnt listen to or get anyone else involved from either side of our families, I have tried contacting her brother but he wouldnt take my calls.
Divorce, contact arrangements, co-parenting you cant do any of this unless you talk and discuss things, I dont expect her to take me back but all I want is to see my kids, and not seeing them is really breaking me down. She is usung the kids to punish me and there is nothing I can do..... I know for sure that she is in contact with lawyers but there is nothing official coming from her side, when my Solicator writes to her she replies in personal capacity. I paid all the bills for the month of July but since I was not having any positive response from her I cancelled all direct debits on my account. Was that a right decision ? I also want to give child support but was hoping we could discuss this and agree on an amount. I do not mind paying even more than I should if only I can see my sons. My elder son starts shcool in 2 weeks and I fear I wont be there for him on his first day of school.
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#2
As the mediator thinks that further midi action is of no use then ask them to supply you with a letter verifying that. This allows you to proceed to court for a child arrangements order.

It doesn’t matter if sivorce proceedings have started or not you can go ahead. You can also do his yourself to save on solicitors expenses if you wish.

As for the direct debits. If for example the electric bill is in your name then the rcorrect thing to do is contact the electric company stating that you have moved out from *insert date* and that your ex is still residing there so bills should be directed to her. They will then end your payments. Ideally at this point you would also give them a meter reading but you don’t have that. If the bills are in her name then there is no problem. She should be in receipt of benefits as a single person by now.
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#3
(08-18-2017, 07:44 PM)Hazy Wrote: As the mediator thinks that further midi action is of no use then ask them to supply you with a letter verifying that. This allows you to proceed to court for a child arrangements order.

It doesn’t matter if sivorce proceedings have started or not you can go ahead.  You can also do his yourself to save on solicitors expenses if you wish.

As for the direct debits. If for example the electric bill is in your name then the rcorrect thing to do is contact the electric company stating that you have moved out from *insert date* and that your ex is still residing there so bills should be directed to her. They will then end your payments.  Ideally at this point you would also give them a meter reading but you don’t have that.   If the bills are in her name then there is no problem.  She should be in receipt of benefits as a single person by now.

With Gas and Electric, he will still be liable for the 30 day notice period, unless his ex agrees to take over the account.

When giving them notice, by law you need to inform your ex, as its illigal to have them cut off without letting her know, so she can either become their customer, or find her own company.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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