11-09-2017, 05:00 PM
Hi all,
I split from my first wife approximately 7 years ago and we have both remarried. I have an 8 year old daughter from that relationship and all is well on that front.
My issue is with my current wife (we have a 6 month old baby together) and her relationship with my daughter.
Initially their relationship was amazing and that was part of my attraction towards her, but over time my wife gradually became more resentful/less tolerant of my daughter and ultimately, whether it was sub-consciously or intentional, began to withdraw from her. Over time, fun times have disappeared and her attitude has deteriorated to the point where I worry about them doing anything together because I know it will end in tears. I have also noticed that my family spend less time with us and I suspect that’s because they have grown so weary of my wife’s attitude.
It has basically gotten to the point where every little thing is blown massively out of proportion and there have been occasions where I have removed myself and my daughter from her presence because I couldn’t stand the dramatics. Also, more importantly, I don’t want my daughter (and that applies to both of my children actually) raised in a hostile home environment.
The new baby has exacerbated the situation as my wife neglects my daughter more than ever and I’m at my wits end figuring out what to do? I was reluctant to get pregnant in the first place as I suspected this would happen, but I felt backed into a corner as for health reasons it was pretty much now or never for my wife to have a baby.
Anyway, what’s done is done, but short of separating – which is an absolute last resort, what can I do?
On one hand I want to make things work and would love for us to become a family rather than an assortment of parts, but on the other hand I can’t see that happening and being totally honest, I don’t like this version of my wife.
As ridiculous as this might sound, it feels like I’ve been “cat-fished” into the pregnancy and I’m now trapped in a situation that I don’t want to be in.
I split from my first wife approximately 7 years ago and we have both remarried. I have an 8 year old daughter from that relationship and all is well on that front.
My issue is with my current wife (we have a 6 month old baby together) and her relationship with my daughter.
Initially their relationship was amazing and that was part of my attraction towards her, but over time my wife gradually became more resentful/less tolerant of my daughter and ultimately, whether it was sub-consciously or intentional, began to withdraw from her. Over time, fun times have disappeared and her attitude has deteriorated to the point where I worry about them doing anything together because I know it will end in tears. I have also noticed that my family spend less time with us and I suspect that’s because they have grown so weary of my wife’s attitude.
It has basically gotten to the point where every little thing is blown massively out of proportion and there have been occasions where I have removed myself and my daughter from her presence because I couldn’t stand the dramatics. Also, more importantly, I don’t want my daughter (and that applies to both of my children actually) raised in a hostile home environment.
The new baby has exacerbated the situation as my wife neglects my daughter more than ever and I’m at my wits end figuring out what to do? I was reluctant to get pregnant in the first place as I suspected this would happen, but I felt backed into a corner as for health reasons it was pretty much now or never for my wife to have a baby.
Anyway, what’s done is done, but short of separating – which is an absolute last resort, what can I do?
On one hand I want to make things work and would love for us to become a family rather than an assortment of parts, but on the other hand I can’t see that happening and being totally honest, I don’t like this version of my wife.
As ridiculous as this might sound, it feels like I’ve been “cat-fished” into the pregnancy and I’m now trapped in a situation that I don’t want to be in.
