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Maintenance whilst still living together?
#1
My ex, who I still live with has mentioned that I should be paying her maintenance now.

We all live in my house, me, her, her 10 year old daughter and our 3 year old son.

I pay all of the following with no input from ex, monthly mortgage, gas, electric, Council Tax, TV licence, house insurance.

We both by our son clothes and food depending who has him.

Am I entitled to pay her,?
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#2
(12-14-2017, 05:59 PM)andynumpty Wrote: My ex, who I still live with has mentioned that I should be paying her maintenance now.

We all live in my house, me, her, her 10 year old daughter and our 3 year old son.

I pay all of the following with no input from ex, monthly mortgage, gas, electric, Council Tax, TV licence, house insurance.

We both by our son clothes and food depending who has him.

Am I entitled to pay her,?

You should have seperate money soon as the relationship ends, and in your situation, the normal would be for your ex as the person who gets Child Benefit, to now claim Tax Credits (working if she works 16 or more hours) and Child Tax Credits on a claim as a single person. If she is not working over 16 hours, she should claim an out of work benefit, like JSA if able to work, or ESA if on the Sick. (Or Universol Credit in come areas).

This means she should pay eveything for herself and the child, with you paying Child Support.
While living in the same house, this would be at the 0 Staying Contact Rate, but this also means that your ex shoudl be providing the food, cloths etc for the child.

Your mortgage payment would be considered, once your not living in the house. However, if its in both names, its up to you both to pay it. Should one of you pay more, then this would be sorted out later, when working out an money matters.

As there is only 1 child, your share of utility bills should be about 40%. Council Tax is shared between the aduilts only, however, if either of you are entitled to any reduction now due to low income as single people, after halfing the bill, you need to consider the reduction as being paid by the person entilted to it..

TV Licence is down to the adults to sort, if you both use it. Any TV services, internet etc you need to consider the overall usage, as to how much you both pay, taking into account your ex needs to pay for the child.

You need to make it clear to your ex, that your not going to pay any normal day to day things for the child is she wants Child Support, as in law it is considered to be a fair contribution towards her normal day to day costs, taking into account your ablitiy to pay.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#3
Hi, thank you for your response.

I ended the relationship last September after a few incidents with her behaviour, which I won't go into detail.

Since then she refused me to have regular time with our son, weekends, holidays etc, so I had to take her to court and in September this year we had a final court hearing which gave me a contact order whilst still in the same house and after living apart.

The house is in my sole name but she has a beneficial interest in it but I pay all the mortgage since she moved in.

I've asked her once our relationship ended to start contributing towards the household monthly bills, which I pay all of, but she refuses.

She works part time but is fairly well paid.

I've tried many a time asking her to try sort the living arrangements out for me to sell the house, and with financial help from me to provide a house for her and our son to live in until he reaches a certain age but she now has said she will pursue me living away from the house, occupation order?

It's had to try and reason with someone who's totally unreasonable.

Sorry forgot to mention that we are not married and never have had any joint bank accounts, always had separate financial arrangements.
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#4
(12-15-2017, 10:39 AM)andynumpty Wrote: Hi, thank you for your response.

I ended the relationship last September after a few incidents with her behaviour, which I won't go into detail.

Since then she refused me to have regular time with our son, weekends, holidays etc, so I had to take her to court and in September this year we had a final court hearing which gave me a contact order whilst still in the same house and after living apart.

The house is in my sole name but she has a beneficial interest in it but I pay all the mortgage since she moved in.

I've asked her once our relationship ended to start contributing towards the household monthly bills, which I pay all of, but she refuses.

She works part time but is fairly well paid.

I've tried many a time asking her to try sort the living arrangements out for me to sell the house, and with financial help from me to provide a house for her and our son to live in until he reaches a certain age but she now has said she will pursue me living away from the house, occupation order?

It's had to try and reason with someone who's totally unreasonable.

Sorry forgot to mention that we are not married and never have had any joint bank accounts, always had separate financial arrangements.

You need legal advise on this, and most CABs can get you a free 30 min chat with someone local to you.

My take on it, is you could start formal eviction process, for Finantial Abuse. Shes wanting to live for free, and also take money off you.

It does not matter that you paid the mortgage since she moved in, as in law, that was "Family Money". Her claim on the house is limited to her being considered as making half the payments, in the time you was a couple.

There is no way she will get an occupation order, when she is not contributing.

How this needs to go, is she needs to move out into a 2 bedroom with the child (unless your contesting her having over 50% residance), and she can get Housing Beneift if in law her income needs to be topped up (will depend on income and tax credit award). You would pay Child Support, what would take into account how many nights a year you have the child. Your Child Support payment is not considered as income, when looking at her benefits.

In terms of contact, if you asked a court, you could get every other weekend, and up to half school holidays.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#5
Hi MarkR,
Thanks again for your advise.

Are you certain that she just can't apply for an occupation order and make me leave the house?

Like I've mentioned I've offered her money back that she put into the house when she moved in plus a percentage of any profit pro rata on house valuation. Also an additional lump sum to enable her to buy a 3 bed house that she'll need until our son is 18, which I think I'm legally obligated to do?

She's never contributed to bills as I've mentioned, before and after we were a couple but would they really evict her with nowhere to live with 2 children, which I couldn't morally do.

I've got a court order in place now which gives me set days I can have our son whilst we still are living together and an order in place when we live apart.

She wasn't happy when her claim for full custody didn't go her way after the usual lies in court, these were ignored and even though I didn't get a 50/50 arrangement like I wanted, it was far better than the current situation. Once the living situation has been sorted out I'll just consider going back to court for more access.
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#6
(12-15-2017, 06:04 PM)andynumpty Wrote: Hi MarkR,
Thanks again for your advise.

Are you certain that she just can't apply for an occupation order and make me leave the house?

Like I've mentioned I've offered her money back that she put into the house when she moved in plus a percentage of any profit pro rata on house valuation. Also an additional lump sum to enable her to buy a 3 bed house that she'll need until our son is 18, which I think I'm legally obligated to do?

She's never contributed to bills as I've mentioned, before and after we were a couple but would they really evict her with nowhere to live with 2 children, which I couldn't morally do.

I've got a court order in place now which gives me set days I can have our son whilst we still are living together and an order in place when we live apart.

She wasn't happy when her claim for full custody didn't go her way after the usual lies in court, these were ignored and even though I didn't get a 50/50 arrangement like I wanted, it was far better than the current situation. Once the living situation has been sorted out I'll just consider going back to court for more access.

You do need to get Qualified Advise on this, but from my understanding on your situation, to get an occupantion order, she needs to be at risk of Domistic Violance.
You have more of a case to remove her, due to the fact she is not willing to pay her own way, let along pay normal day to day costs for the child, while also seeking Child Support.

As you was not married, you have no obligations towards her, and as the Resident Parnet, it is up to her to provide the home for the Child.
I am not getting where you are saying she needs a 3 bedroom house from. Under The Housing Act 2002 she needs
a, 1 bedroom for each couple or single person aged 16 or over
b, 2 children of the same sex under 16 can share a room
c, 2 children under 10 can share a room regardless of sex.
There is also a size limit on rooms that are suitable for 2 people, so for example, most Box rooms would under the law only be big enough for 1 person.

The requirement for her to house the child does not end automaticly at 18. Child Benefit is the deciding factor, what might end at 16, or extend up to the summer after 19th birthday, depending on
a, Education status
b, amount of "Timetabled" study per week
c, number of hours the young person is working in term time.

As far as the law is concerned, once Chld Benefit stops, they are no longer a dependent child (and Child Suport stops also).

With formal evication, her local authority might be able to help her.

Be aware that things like you offering to buy her a house, could cause her issues with other benefits, and might even make her not able to claim somethings.
Gifts over £1000 can be considered as income for Benefits, and having £6000 in the bank will mean she can not claim anything income related.

In my opinion, let her get on with it, and put some cash away, so you can support the child if they stay on in education. If they go to Higher Education (for example Uni) they will get little help from the state.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#7
Thank you MarkR for your advice, is this from personal experience only?

I'll keep this thread updated on events incase someone else is in same position as me ?
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#8
(12-16-2017, 11:18 AM)andynumpty Wrote: Thank you MarkR for your advice, is this from personal experience only?

I'll keep this thread updated on events incase someone else is in same position as me ?

This is just from my experiance, what is why I am saying you need to get down to the CAB and get a free chat with a local Solicitor.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#9
Hi MarkR, it's me again.

Just a thought do you think I could put a claim in to the CMS against her as I'm paying all the bills with no in put from her, or does it need to be a non resident parent?
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#10
(12-18-2017, 10:54 PM)andynumpty Wrote: Hi MarkR, it's me again.

Just a thought do you think I could put a claim in to the CMS against her as I'm paying all the bills with no in put from her, or does it need to be a non resident parent?

To claim Child Support via CMS or Court, you need to be getting Child Benefit (or would be getting if your income did not exceed threadhold).

The problem is, Child Benefit will need you to evidance that you have the child for over 50% of the nights, or if 50/50, you have more daytime care than the other parent.

50/50 is becoming a grey area, as while the Dot Gov Website saids its payable, there has been court cases where its not had to be paid, as the other parent, without cliaming child benefit or child tax credit, is supporting the child in their time.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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