Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
All time low
#1
Wife dropped bombshell New Year’s Day that we should end our 20 year marriage. I’ll be honest, I’ve know for ages that things weren’t good but just got on with things. So, living together, one 14 year old son living with us.  No conflict and on good speaking terms. I earn double what my wife earns. Lots of questions, should I move out ? Should we sell ? Can we live separately under same roof ? Phoned solicitor today, £72 for half hour discussion ?  Head is spinning what to do. 
Emotionally I’m shot, yes I’ve considered ending things, just want to sleep. Don’t know where to turn , need a little help.  Daz.
Reply
#2
The advice is not to move out. You can live separately under the same roof.
You definitely need to speak to a solicitor.
She's probably been thinking about this for a while so she may already have sought advice.
Try to keep things businesslike between each other.

Looking after your own physical and emotional wellbeing should be your number one priority.
Reply
#3
Thanks for the quick reply. I will make appointment with solicitor and go from
there. As for me, can’t deny I’m strugling big time.
Reply
#4
(01-03-2018, 11:58 AM)dbroms Wrote: Thanks for the quick reply. I will make appointment with solicitor and go from
there. As for me, can’t deny I’m strugling big time.

Feel your pain mate, I am in same situation came to a head early December she says she love me but not in love anymore.
I go through good and bad days best thing I have done so far is get to the gym daily takes mind of it, there is an article called the '180' approach where I am going against my feelings of wanting her to stay and showing on the outside I am making plans for mine and kids future without her.
At this time my wife is in limbo whether to do a trial or give me/her a final shot but I only want that if she is open to trying to connect with me again.

Read some of the old posts on here and you will see many guys who started on the journey and now posting now with their life back on track which gives me hope....
Reply
#5
Sad al, many thanks for your reply. I read your post and thought it was my situation 100%. She loves me but not like old times blah blah. I know how you mean about up and down, I sometimes just can’t think how the future pans out being a single dad. I worry about my son and don’t even want to think of the pain he will feel when we break the news to him, kills me inside. Will have a look for that article you mention cheers.
Reply
#6
Hi bro....sorry to hear what's going on....as the guys say don't move out....not good if goes to court. Try and shop about for different solicitors some give first half hour free if you need some more advice. And the 180 is a great bit of advice while you living under the same roof. I know how you are feeling many if us are going through this aswell....it sucks big time but this site will help...so much info and helpful guys to talk to....we are here to help
Reply
#7
Cheers Scott and everyone else. Reading through all the 180 articles. Some interesting things there but seems to be aimed for the partner hurt by the other having an affair but certainly can use some of the techniques so cheers for the heads up. It has helped reading through other people’s storys on here, one day at a time I guess.
Reply
#8
Well if some of it helps you deal with things then that's a good start....yes 1 day at a time bro.
Reply
#9
Slow down.

Take care of yourself.

There no huge rush to do anything right now.

Stay put in the house while you think, talk or seek advice.
Reply
#10
Bang in the same situation and on New Years Day. We discussed separating because although we love and care for each other we are totally different and basically just been living together as Parents for the last few years rather than as a loving couple.
We are gathering our thoughts for a few weeks before we officially decide but I think we need to separate.

I just can't bear the thought of not seeing my daughter each night, and only at weekends. We are so close.
Reply




Users browsing this thread: 2 Guest(s)