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Contact Centres
#1
Hi guys,

Just a quick one my ex is insisting i have contact with my daughter in a contact centre..  I have refused as i am not a safety issue at all.  (She was the violent one)..

Am i well within my rights to refuse this? no disrespect to anyone but i have been told contact centres are for safety issues (History of drugs, violence etc)

I have offered very reasonable contact arrangements and she still refuses, so my solicitor is now drafting my proposals in a letter to send to her.  Hopefully this books her ideas up a little.
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#2
(03-14-2018, 09:22 AM)orings Wrote: Hi guys,

Just a quick one my ex is insisting i have contact with my daughter in a contact centre..  I have refused as i am not a safety issue at all.  (She was the violent one)..

Am i well within my rights to refuse this? no disrespect to anyone but i have been told contact centres are for safety issues (History of drugs, violence etc)

I have offered very reasonable contact arrangements and she still refuses, so my solicitor is now drafting my proposals in a letter to send to her.  Hopefully this books her ideas up a little.

Hi, i have been in exactly the same position as you and i am currently in a contact centre. I also had no safeguarding issues and it was endorsed by cafcass in the section 7 report. Well i have one week left before we go back to court to report how it has all gone. Then im hopeful that we will be out of the centre and having normal contact but we will see. 

I was also told to refuse the contact centre if i had done nothing wrong as it sort of makes it look like you are admitting there is a problem. But mother was denying all contact and cafcass told me that if pushed into a corner she would agree to contact in a centre. She still tried to push for supervised contact in court until the court reminded her that all her allegations were found to be unsubstantiated and that she would have to contribute towards the cost. She soon went quiet and agreed, there is no way i would have agreed to supervised contact but i ended up agreeing to go to the centre. Cafcass also recommended that contact should start in a centre to begin because i hadnt seen my daughter for a while and the court went with it as they usually do. I think they just wanted to get contact going and in the end it was the only way it was going to happen. 

You can refuse as you say there is no reason for it, the only reason as in my case is to appease the mother. But it has kind of helped as it has protected me from allegations at handovers or when i have my daughter and the centre staff have seen how my daughter is with me. Although it was only supported contact and they do not have to do any reports for court they do keep notes about you all and how contact has progressed. 

I was the same, i refused and argued that there was no need for it, i would have preferred not to go there, they are not the best places for contact, i dound it stressful to begin with but has become easier the more i have seen my daughter. It costs money you could spend on your daughter and puts everyone out tbh. But you choose your battles and in the end i chose not  fight this battle and looked at the bigger picture and just wanted to see my daughter and build a relationship with her.
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#3
Mate cheers for the advice.. just annoying as you say no safety issues involved. I am also getting to the point where i just want to see my daughter no matter what and if it has to be supported contact to get that bond going again then it looks that way..

Just a pride thing aswell tbh with the way she acted with me, made my life hell wanted to get back at her... But hey life is to short and my daughter knowing her father and me getting to be with her should top trump any animosity towards my ex.

even if it kills me to know that iwill be doing what she wants! ill have to do it..

Still got my Court app going in though just incase.

Eventually it will get better i hope. Just spoke with my solicitor and she has advised me to do the centre and then work it up from it...

are you working on a better relationship with your ex or has that boat well and truly sailed, sank and wont be found for thousands of years ha?
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