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Need to vent
#1
Hi guys

I'm really not doing well at the moment, I feel completely let down by the courts and cafcass. The ex is playing them all like a harp and despite everything she's doing, stuff that everyone says reflects badly on her it doesn't, I jump through all the hoops do everything by the book and all it does is put me in a worse position, I don't understand anymore... I'm feeling lost and alone... I know I won't give up on fighting to see my daughter but my confidence is shattered... I can't sleep, work is becoming a struggle... be nice to have some good news for once... I'm rambling on about it all but my daughter is my life and she's being taken from me and the injustice of it all is crushing... I don't know what to do anymore
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#2
I know things are really shitty at the moment, and it seems like the hole you're in isn't something you can get out of, but it will pass.  For now, is there anything you can do to keep yourself strong?  I found even just leaving my phone behind and going for a walk outside in the sunshine helped a lot.  It reminded me that no matter how bad things seemed to be for me, the birds keep on singing and the Sun keeps rising.

If you're going through Hell, keep going...
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#3
Cheese I feel exactly the same as you. Every day I feel like I’m getting beaten down. I’ve just got slapped with another 2k solicitor bill and I don’t feel any closer to my daughter. I actually feel further away than ever before.
Marwoods comment is inspiring, shame I never see the sun or hear the birds. I’m having to work all the hours I can to pay bills like above as well as now pay for the whole house on my own.
What area do you live in cheese.
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#4
Hello,

We all are in the same boat. I am fighting and will fight till last breath. I think we all will fight. I cant afford a solicitor and I believe thing will come out as it supposes to come out if you get solicitor or not. I understand it helps but I simply don't have the money. I am in better condition now than I was 4 months back. However, still, it comes on the face and hit like a brick. No point of coming back home after you complete your work. No small hands waiting in the window. It's killing from inside. Possibly the worst time of my life. How can a woman turn into so selfish? I was with her for 10 years and I was the one who helped her walk back after she was in the hospital for 3 months after breaking leg. I got this in return as a "Thank you" gift for the stuff I have done for her.

Hopefully, there will be an end to this very soon and we all be able to settle down in life (of course without a marriage). #hellnotomarriage.
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#5
Its perfectly simple and easy to understand, to these types of women, they believe the children are their possession and only they know best. They convince themselves the selfish behaviour is "protecting" child and any and all dustructive brutal means justifies the ends. Society in general supports the stereotype [along with the guys that skip out on the kids, they dont do us any favours]

In truth, if we are going to overanalyze the system, it cant be made too easy, Im sure to some extent they want to see how hard you'll work and fight and try to raise your kids. If it was too easy there would be just as many men spiting their ex as there are mothers witholding.
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#6
Hey Cheese it I really hate to feel your pain and others who are in the same boat of not seeing or been seen to have minimal contact with their children.

Please hang in their. I am struggling now as to financially support my self n my child.

The legal costs run in to the 1000s each time.and each month has been like this.

Its wrong . As I said before ,the process in court will eat away at you until u are left in a hole and being no good for anyone. Nobody cares to those given the orders. It is a job to them that pays greatly.

As I am a resident parent again during the interim order following the courts complete mess up at previous hearings I too felt some wat sick letting my child be with the ex. However I have always promoted contact so that the ex never had to go through what u are all feeling.

I am made out by the ex as a control freak?
And her determination to bad character my name.

The courts and those associated such as CAFCASS have no competency to know what is in the best interest of the child.

They like to do thier best to make things difficult for a resident parent especially if you are the father and likely as in my case they did their very best at the final order they gave last year until I Appealed it. You cannot give a shared order and live with the mother on x xday if she is living in a refuge you plonkers..

But they will try and bend from the rules when a father is concerned.

I hope all gets sorted with you.
It will be nice for children to be again be reunited with their fathers.

You all are great dads .Its always nice to know that society has decent fathers. You children are lucky. Most fathers do have a bad reputation.however saying that, a child should be and have the right to both parents.
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