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Position Statements are in, Oh God
#1
Well its finally here. Wow. I dont know where to start.
She contradicts herself in her own statement a lot. She has made many accusations that she actually did herself [how do they come up with this shit?]
Anyway, most concerning is accusation of DV against her other daughter. She was 14-15 at the time. 3-4 years ago ex was having an argument/wrestling match with her daughter and I always stayed out of it, but on this occasion it got way too violent for my liking so I took daughter by the arms and moved her over and sat her on the couch and kept them seperate for a while.

Anyway, its full of the usual stuff, not feeding her, making medical appointments without her permission, dirty clothes. Says child is struggling with it all and thats my fault, but my daughter has recently been telling me that "mummy wont let me go to sleep and keeps waking me up." Very worrying.

So......
She has claimed Im alcoholic, but not asked for a liver test.
She has claimed DV but said zero before now and not filled in a C1A
She's made all kinds of accusations, even referring to nice text messages from me in a negative way but..... get this..... submitted no evidence AT ALL.

So questions:
Are you absolutely not allowed to submit evidence to refute claims? some of it is complete lies, some of it is serioues misrepresented.
Is it possible, if ex jumps on this DV thing will the court turn round at the final hearing and say we need a fact finding? it was years ago so there will be no evidence AT ALL, other than daughters say so.

If she isnt contradicting herself in her own statement, its most definitely contradicted by my EVIDENCE.
Im over the moon.

Her solicitor has approached mine to say see if we can come to an agreement. My solicitor says its very unlikely given her proposal which is, cut cut cut.

Anything can happen so not counting chickens yet.
Im beginning to think ex is not taking this seriously at all.
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#2
(03-29-2018, 01:54 PM)Naive Wrote: Well its finally here. Wow. I dont know where to start.
She contradicts herself in her own statement a lot. She has made many accusations that she actually did herself [how do they come up with this shit?]
Anyway, most concerning is accusation of DV against her other daughter. She was 14-15 at the time. 3-4 years ago ex was having an argument/wrestling match with her daughter and I always stayed out of it, but on this occasion it got way too violent for my liking so I took daughter by the arms and moved her over and sat her on the couch and kept them seperate for a while.

Anyway, its full of the usual stuff, not feeding her, making medical appointments without her permission, dirty clothes. Says child is struggling with it all and thats my fault, but my daughter has recently been telling me that "mummy wont let me go to sleep and keeps waking me up." Very worrying.

So......
She has claimed Im alcoholic, but not asked for a liver test.
She has claimed DV but said zero before now and not filled in a C1A
She's made all kinds of accusations, even referring to nice text messages from me in a negative way but..... get this..... submitted no evidence AT ALL.

So questions:
Are you absolutely not allowed to submit evidence to refute claims? some of it is complete lies, some of it is serioues misrepresented.
Is it possible, if ex jumps on this DV thing will the court turn round at the final hearing and say we need a fact finding? it was years ago so there will be no evidence AT ALL, other than daughters say so.

If she isnt contradicting herself in her own statement, its most definitely contradicted by my EVIDENCE.
Im over the moon.

Her solicitor has approached mine to say see if we can come to an agreement. My solicitor says its very unlikely given her proposal which is, cut cut cut.

Anything can happen so not counting chickens yet.
Im beginning to think ex is not taking this seriously at all.
Is it a position statement?  Or an actual statement for a final hearing?   Whichever it sounds identical to what happened with me- a whole pile of made up rubbish (and also claimed I hardly saw son for the first 5 years when he spent a third of the time with me from birth!).  She is mudslinging and they will see that.

Can't remember if you've had first hearing yet.  I did take a few things along with me in a folder to first hearing in case I had the opportunity to show anything to Cafcass.  Nearly did at one point after being accused of being something she did and had the emails to prove otherwise in my folder but Cafcass woman declined to see them.
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#3
These are statements for the final hearing. Had the first hearing already. One month now until final hearing. Oh God if only I could submit evidence to dispute she would be toast. But the barrister will be armed.
Whilst a lot of it is petty shit it’s a bit of a personal wish to be vindicated but I know I have to stay child focused.
I can’t work out if she is an idiot or a genius, a lot of the accusations are vague, without detail or proof.
Example, she is asking for an order that contact be every other weekend. She then asks for an order that i am to be reasonable about giving up that time if daughter has party’s to go to.
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#4
I shouldn't worry - my ex's statement for final hearing was full of lies, mud slinging and asking the court to go with the no order principle. Assume that bundle has gone and now you've had her statement. Technically nothing else can go once the bundle is in, but in my case she kept sending extra bits! So I asked if I could submit a couple of extra bits (ie evidence to counteract one of her lies that son had always spent Christmas with her) and solicitor said yes. While they weren't in the bundle on the day, the Barrister could see them and decide whether he needed them or not. And to be honest all that twaddle was ignored. Barrister said that her extreme negativity towards me would not do her any favours in front of the Judge. Whereas my statement was factual, calm and any claims supported by evidence, and more child focused.

So don't worry about what she says - it is a bombshell when you see their statement. Leave your Barrister to sort it out. Anything you can tell them or show them in advance that helps them argue your case, can help though so they can be prepared for anything and navigate it. So if there is some particular evidence you have that she is lying you could email it to barrister with a note maybe?

That is twaddle about asking you to give up time so daughter can go to a party. If daughter goes to a party during your week-end, you take her and pick her up! They play on the Mother thing to nth degree (as in the only person who can care for and knows best). My ex did and she has never been like that before! Quite happy to delegate all the parenting to me in the past!

What your barrister will be looking for in her statement is contradictions that show she is lying, or ask her questions about something then later ask a similar question that makes her contradict herself.

Anything in her statement that is not backed up by evidence is just "he said she said" and/or mudslinging. I think they get overconfident in this Mother role and think they are untouchable when it comes to making decisions about the children.

Main thing for you now is to know your own statement really well as you'll be questioned about it.
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