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residency in mothers name but child living with me
#1
Hi,


a residency order was made in 2012 for my daughter to live with her mother but since november 2015 my daughter has lived with me, this was a mutual agreement. My ex then moved 150 miles away leaving my daughter with me. She has recently moved back and still is happy for my daughter to live with me. she is manic depression and struggles to cope and look after her other 3 children. I want to get my daughter a passport but for some unknown reason my ex refuses to let her have one and as she  has the residency in her name she says that it is her decision. my daughter is 9 and i want to be able to take her on holiday. my ex does not want her daughter back but refuses to hand over all rights to me. 

Does anybody know how to get the order changed into my name? and how to get her a passport without the mothers permission. would i need to pay for a whole new application or just ammend the old one?

any help would be great
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#2
Yeah you would apply for a variation, but the fact it was 2012 might be an issue, someone else might confirm. I think some of the law has changed since then.
Anyway, if she is not contesting that child lives with you then officially you would have a consent order but as you say she is not going to agree, if only to stop the passport issue.
As long as you have lots and lots of proof of living with you, and that mum voluntarily moved away you should be ok.

Do you think if you go down this road that she might change her mind and decide to have child back with her and her other children? cos that would be a battle.
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#3
(04-09-2018, 02:25 PM)Naive Wrote: Yeah you would apply for a variation, but the fact it was 2012 might be an issue, someone else might confirm. I think some of the law has changed since then.
Anyway, if she is not contesting that child lives with you then officially you would have a consent order but as you say she is not going to agree, if only to stop the passport issue.
As long as you have lots and lots of proof of living with you, and that mum voluntarily moved away you should be ok.

Do you think if you go down this road that she might change her mind and decide to have child back with her and her other children? cos that would be a battle.

hi thanks for your reply. social services got in touch about 8 months ago and done an investigation as to why my daughter was living here. My ex and her children have had a lot of involvement with them. they got in touch with her school and visited my house several times and spent time with my daughter. the report states that my daughter is doing very well since living with father and school reported no concerns at all. it also says the mother is happy for the child living with father and that mother does not want full residency due to not being able to cope. it also says child is better off living with father due to mothers lack of stability shown over the years.

your right its a possibility she would fight for her back but i doubt she would put that much effort into something she dont want, it would be out of spite if anything. she lives 1 minute from my house, yet she has her daughter 1 night a fortnight only and thats her choice, she says she is too ill for any more contact then that
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#4
If your daughter lives with you, is registered with you, at your address then I think you can get a passport. If I were you Id take yourself over to Mumsnet. Those guys are getting passports for their kids despite estranged father's all the time.
My ex managed it, simply because she didnt want to ask me. My daughter has my name so Im not sure how she managed it but since I want daughter to have a passport that was a battle I avoided.
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#5
the only problem with that is that she has the residency order is in her name and ill be breaking the order by getting her a passport and taking her out of the country with out the mothers consent.  I need the residency put into my name, she will always have a hold of me until then. i dont get why she is so difficult but at the same time has no interest in my daughters life. her words were "my children havnt got a passport so why would she?" she has been on the dull all her life, i work thats why none of her children have one.

do you know what forms i would fill in for a variation? is it the same form?
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#6
Yeah fair enough, not much choice then really eh. Apply for a variation and hope mum doesnt fight it. It doesnt sound like she has much fight in her for this issue anyway.

I know this might be way way way out of line. But if she is hard up, have you considered offering her the money youd have to spend on court if she would sign her over?

Im not even sure if thats legal or moral but surely in childs best interest practically. Id be really really careful how you say and make sure it cant be proved. That could easily be twisted and come back to burn you.

(04-09-2018, 03:42 PM)wilson286 Wrote: the only problem with that is that she has the residency order is in her name and ill be breaking the order by getting her a passport and taking her out of the country with out the mothers consent.  I need the residency put into my name, she will always have a hold of me until then. i dont get why she is so difficult but at the same time has no interest in my daughters life. her words were "my children havnt got a passport so why would she?" she has been on the dull all her life, i work thats why none of her children have one.

do you know what forms i would fill in for a variation? is it the same form?

I dont Im afraid but if no one posts here I would start a new thread asking that, Im sure someone knows.
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#7
haha she would snap up the money then tell the court i forced her to sign it.... you wouldnt believe how she twists things! ive got too much on her for to be able to fight even if she wanted to
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#8
Who is getting the child benefit for this child?
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#9
I have. Even getting the child benefit since she lived with me in the end of 2015. Everything is in my name... school, doctors etc. The residency order is the only thing that is in the mothers name
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#10
Sounds like you'd have very strong case for getting the court order in your favour.
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