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Timescales for increasing contact
#1
Hello separated Dads!

Firstly; thankyou for posting on this forum. Your outpourings have been a useful and reassuring resource over the last year or so.

I'm seeking some idea of the timescales the courts have ordered for increasing your contact up to weekend stays.

My son has recently turned 2 years old, and various posts lead me to believe that I could now expect weekend stays.

For the last year (since separation) I've had him for 1 weekday afternoon (6 hours) and 1 weekend day (11am-7pm) plus the odd few hours when his mum had an appointment in my town.

We recently attended mediation in an attempt to sort overnight stays. I abandoned it after it became plain that mum wasn't going to budge.

The good news is that within 30 minutes of me walking with the appropriate C100 page signed by the mediator, mum was on the phone offering 1 overnight stay plus the following day every second weekend.

I've accepted this and enjoyed the first overnight stay.

However, it appears that this is unlikely to increase any time soon. She's unwilling to set a schedule for increasing contact, and she's told me that I won't be having him for the weekend any time over the next 4 months.

I worry that she's just running down the clock on the signed mediation form.

So, were I to involve the courts, could I expect them to set a specific timed schedule of increasing contact?

What might that look like?

e.g.
X? weeks of 1 overnight stay including following day
X? weeks of both days either side of the overnight stay
Then full on fun-filled weekends camping with Daddy forever!

Your experiences would be really helpful.

Feel free to tell me if you think I'm asking too much too soon, I realise many of you are suffering far more restrictions.

Thanks for reading.
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#2
I would ask for overnight contact from fri 5pm until sun 5pm every 2 weeks for example and a day during week for daytime contact weekly
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#3
(04-20-2018, 08:38 PM)warwickshire1 Wrote: I would ask for overnight contact from fri 5pm until sun 5pm every 2 weeks for example and a day during week for daytime contact weekly

Thanks Warwickshire1.

That's what I've been requesting of his mum, and what I will request of the court should I fail in negotiating with her.

I'd like to know if the courts are likely to order full weekends straight away, or will they order some sort of build up of the time first.
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#4
They probably will possibly build it up especially if your ex partner raises concerns , it may start one night every weekend then progress to every other weekend. its ashame ex partners don't put childrens needs first before their own
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#5
(04-20-2018, 09:07 PM)warwickshire1 Wrote: They probably will possibly build it up especially if your ex partner raises concerns , it may start one night every weekend then progress to every other weekend.

And therein lies the rub.

What might be the timescale for going from 1 night to a full weekend? That's really the question. How long will I have to wait for weekends?
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#6
I think if you ask for something sensible and reasonable in the application they are likely to follow that/order it. So for example.

9am Saturday to 9am Sunday each week and every wednesday night from 4pm (or nursery finish time) to 9am Thursday for 3 months

Commencing 1st September 2018:
Week 1 Friday from nursery finish time through to Sunday 4pm and Thursday nursery finish time through to Friday return to nursery
Week 2 Monday from nursery finish time through to Tuesday return to nursery.
To continue all year round.

Commencing 1st September 2020
Week 1 Friday from school finish time through to Monday return to school, Wednesday school finish time through to Friday return to school.
Week 2 Wednesday school finish time through to Friday return to school.

Half the school holidays to be defined.

What that does is after three months it increases to every other week-end plus a midweek night - I've put in the pattern I have which is alternate Mondays and Thursdays instead of say Wednesday each week because it means you see him every 3 or 4 days as now. Whereas if it was every Wednesday night then one week you'd go almost a week between seeing him.

Assuming he is 4 in September 2020(?) and starting reception year at school. Have put a 50/50 schedule - every other week-end from Friday to Monday and 2 consecutive midweek nights each week.

You can only ask! That would tie it up for the foreseeable future. When does your mediation sign off run out? I think it only lasts 4 months.
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#7
The above sounds good. A definite great guide in more detail than I explained what to ask for
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#8
It's basically a draft order. I had a draft order attached to my statement to show what I was asking for, but it can be more detailed. On an initial application you can't attach a draft order so the basic contact times progressing could be good. It's just my suggestion as I've found if you're vague things don't always get interpreted how you want them to be.
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