Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
2 year old child - mother limiting my time with him - please help
#1
Hi, 
First of all, I would like to sincerely thanks the person who created this forum and I am hoping this can help me and I can also potentially help other fathers. 


I have been separated for a bit less than a year, currently going through the divorce process in Switzerland. My ex and my son of 15 months live together and I have currently limited visitation rights to 6 hours per week (3 times 2 hours). 
We just had a second session with the judge and he decided to extend my visitation rights progressively, based on the age and needs of the child, which is good and understandable.


However, here are the issues: 

- my ex is very unlikely to comply with this court order, and the only consequence she might face is a fine (family law in Switzerland is still very conservative compared to other countries)
- she is cutting all communication via phone, sms, email, whatsapp, etc... and just contact me when either she needs a) money or b)my signature. One of the reason she is doing that is because, I requested alternate custody (50/50 time shared between parents) and she knows that the criteria for that are a) close geographical distance between parents b) good communication between parents. Therefore she is sabotaging all my efforts to improve communication. I propose her several options such as mediation, communicated at least once a week by phone
- she has a total lack of trust and thinks she is the only one who can take care properly of the child
- she took away the child from kindergarten, only after 2 weeks of settling in period, pretending the centre cannot take care of him well
- Even during the time I am with my son, she is interfering my visit per email (as she wants to use this against me in court claiming I am unable to feed him properly)
- countless provocations and insults towards me
- she keeps finding all ridiculous excuse to limit my time with my son.

I am desperate and don't know what I can do more. I tried the following:

- speak to her directly and reestablish communication
- follow recommendations on books I found about co-parenting with a very young child
- take care of myself (journaling, exercise, etc...)
- try to negotiate with her


Any other suggestions are welcome

My lawyer advised me well and the latest court order guarantees me extension of visiting rights. My lawyer says it is based on this court order, that I can claim my rights and if she violates one, we need tangible proofs, so that we can request a change of it.

But still the mother doesn't want to listen

Thanks for your help and advise
Reply
#2
(05-12-2018, 06:56 AM)dadloveshisson Wrote: Hi, 
First of all, I would like to sincerely thanks the person who created this forum and I am hoping this can help me and I can also potentially help other fathers. 


I have been separated for a bit less than a year, currently going through the divorce process in Switzerland. My ex and my son of 15 months live together and I have currently limited visitation rights to 6 hours per week (3 times 2 hours). 
We just had a second session with the judge and he decided to extend my visitation rights progressively, based on the age and needs of the child, which is good and understandable.


However, here are the issues: 

- my ex is very unlikely to comply with this court order, and the only consequence she might face is a fine (family law in Switzerland is still very conservative compared to other countries)
- she is cutting all communication via phone, sms, email, whatsapp, etc... and just contact me when either she needs a) money or b)my signature. One of the reason she is doing that is because, I requested alternate custody (50/50 time shared between parents) and she knows that the criteria for that are a) close geographical distance between parents b) good communication between parents. Therefore she is sabotaging all my efforts to improve communication. I propose her several options such as mediation, communicated at least once a week by phone
- she has a total lack of trust and thinks she is the only one who can take care properly of the child
- she took away the child from kindergarten, only after 2 weeks of settling in period, pretending the centre cannot take care of him well
- Even during the time I am with my son, she is interfering my visit per email (as she wants to use this against me in court claiming I am unable to feed him properly)
- countless provocations and insults towards me
- she keeps finding all ridiculous excuse to limit my time with my son.

I am desperate and don't know what I can do more. I tried the following:

- speak to her directly and reestablish communication
- follow recommendations on books I found about co-parenting with a very young child
- take care of myself (journaling, exercise, etc...)
- try to negotiate with her


Any other suggestions are welcome

My lawyer advised me well and the latest court order guarantees me extension of visiting rights. My lawyer says it is based on this court order, that I can claim my rights and if she violates one, we need tangible proofs, so that we can request a change of it.

But still the mother doesn't want to listen

Thanks for your help and advise

We are a UK Based Forum, so in terms of systems etc its the UK ones we know.

How it would work in a UK Family Court Case, is that up to 2 you would get 4-6 hours, over 1 or 2 days as a min.

Then from 2 you would get overnight stays, with a normal starting point being Friday till Sunday every 2 weeks, and up to half school holidays.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
Reply


Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Limiting time with my child to get more maintenance money mattjnd 3 4,356 10-01-2018, 10:08 PM
Last Post: MarkR
  Not being able to return child on time at the end of contact... TheDetective 2 3,670 03-29-2018, 10:26 PM
Last Post: Charlie7000
  Mother has Relocated with Child without iforming anyone Jackson07 3 4,431 12-16-2017, 01:36 AM
Last Post: Charlie7000
  Holidays without child, to recover lost time? Alibash 2 4,143 05-24-2017, 08:52 AM
Last Post: MarkR
Wink Worried for child's safety with mother stephbond89 1 4,514 11-27-2016, 06:51 PM
Last Post: MarkR
  Increase contact time with child Reza 3 8,112 09-13-2016, 07:19 PM
Last Post: MarkR
  Any advice on how to contact child after mother moved away and took her..? Becks76 3 7,152 08-31-2016, 07:21 PM
Last Post: MarkR



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)