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Overnight contact schedule
#1
I've a court hearing soon for arranging overnight contact - Have had my daughter regularly during the day for the last 2 months and no issues at all (though I have no doubt my ex will make some issues up when it comes to the hearing)

I was planning to request for 3 nights per week, on alternate weeks, for example monday afternoon till wed morning, then the following week from friday afternoon till monday morning. 

Would this be classed as a reasonable request to the judge? I am out of the country for near 7 months of the year so this arrangment would only be in place for 5 months of the year.
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#2
I dont want to put a downer on it but in my experience that seems an uphill struggle. The courts like to bleat on about routine, going form not seeing dad for 7 months to suddenly 3 nights per week then back to 7 months without dad seems like it might cause issues.
How old is daughter?
I would suggest something like weekend only overnights and stick to the daytime stuff during the week.

My general opinion with the courts is that if you dont agree and the mother opposes the proposal then the father has to be able to commit full time to the schedule without the mother's cooperation.

Being out of the country for 7 months will be a massive sticking point in any child arrangements order I think. Sorry, just sayin.

It seems like you might be best to go for the quality time and holidays rather than midweek overnights.
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#3
I can't believe what u just came up with! no disrespect but people create environment and stability for their children adjusting whole lives to proof in front of judges that they can provide solid routine and still struggle in court rooms to get descent contact, and u... U just want to be out of the country half of the time then come back play with ur kid then go away bye! Back and forth are you serious?? Dude are u retarded? If I was a judge I would throw u out of the court room without even hearing mothers evidence I would tell you if u want a season fun u better go to toysurus get a doll play for 5 months then shove it under the bed when u come back bring it out dust it and play for another few months. U need to be serious either u want to be a father or be a joker.
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#4
(05-17-2018, 10:05 AM)Robert London Wrote: I can't believe what u just came up with!  no disrespect but people create environment and stability for their children adjusting whole lives to proof in front of judges that they can provide solid routine and still struggle in court rooms to get descent contact, and u... U just want to be out of the country half of the time then come back play with ur kid then go away bye! Back and forth are you serious??  Dude are u retarded?  If I was a judge I would throw u out of the court room without even hearing mothers evidence I would tell you if u want a season fun u better go to toysurus get a doll play for 5 months then shove it under the bed when u come back bring it out dust it and play for another few months. U need to be serious either u want to be a father or be a joker.

Not OK Robert, be nice
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#5
I'm sorry but sometimes being bold and simple can help people to open their eyes and reflect on things, when I read that I couldn't believe it ( season father)
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#6
I don't work a 'season', I'm not some ticket salesperson in Ibiza. I am a specialised, and in demand engineer who works worldwide... And fortunately for you and a lot of other people, you are not a judge.

All previous judges have shown no issues with me working abroad, and that contact would obviously have to be arranged around my work schedule.

I was looking to see if anyone had any similar scenarios with working abroad and what arrangements they have set out. When I am away I will have regular video calls to keep contact going with my daughter until I am home again.

Previous mentions with judges and legal reps haven't shown any issues with 2/3 nights per week when I am home.
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#7
Everyone's circumstances are different and there are people who work out of the country. I'm really not sure how it would work in terms of a schedule in this case - Mark might know. How old is your daughter?

I would have thought if you were out of the country for 7 months a year, then it would be a case of putting together a schedule package of something like Skype and phone calls while you were away, alternate week-ends when you were back and set holiday weeks. Rather than 3 nights a week they maybe wouldn't want to disrupt her regular routine that much - so maybe 3 nights a fortnight plus holidays might be an option. Say every other week-end Friday to Sunday pm and then a Thursday night.

Because she'd live with her Mother full-time while you're away that would seem more likely.
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#8
I can understand it may disturb her schedule somewhat but i don't want it to be a case of barely seeing her either, it's a difficult one.. at the moment I see her 3 times per week for 6 hours each time.

Instead of alternative weekends, I was hoping for set days each week. If I go by alternative weekends she would only stay over around 20 nights per year, I'd probably be seeing her more now than an alternative weekend schedule

With asking for holidays - it's a good chance that I wouldnt be home for any of them, or at least the majority of them. At the moment my daughter is 1, but she will be 2 shortly after the hearing that's coming up.
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#9
(05-18-2018, 07:01 AM)kettleman Wrote: I can understand it may disturb her schedule somewhat but i don't want it to be a case of barely seeing her either, it's a difficult one.. at the moment I see her 3 times per week for 6 hours each time.

Instead of alternative weekends, I was hoping for set days each week. If I go by alternative weekends she would only stay over around 20 nights per year, I'd probably be seeing her more now than an alternative weekend schedule

Dont mind us buddy, we're just bitter and cynical. Despite being fully involved fathers when we were in the family we are now treated like token parents, if that. A mother will quite happily leave child with childminder for 8 hours a day but the mere presence of a father during the week is painted as disruptive.
Ideally what you want is a progressive schedule for each time you return, lots of day time contact. How about going for 3 full weekends a month, Fri to Mon, thats reasonable since ex gets all weekends when youre away. And then lots of day time contact during the week.
I do feel overnights during the week wont be seen favorably by the court as it wont be a permanent routine.
Its a shame your ex wont play ball, what is her proposal? or is she just saying no to everything like mine did.
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#10
Naive's suggestion is good. You want a tailor made increasing schedule probaby (and important to the the indirect contact ordered for the 7 months you're away - Skype, phone calls and letters).

How about every week-end from Friday 4pm to Saturday 4pm plus a midweek few hours (say wed 2 till 5), increasing to 3 week-ends a month and a midweek overnight when she starts reception year at school aged 4?
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