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Social workers recommended supervised contact, wife being unreasonable
#1
Hello,

The kids are with me full time as their mother was hitting them and was cautioned by the police for child cruelty. Divorce papers have been submitted. The children are on a child in need plan, we have yet to have a meeting. 

Social workers have recommend supervised contact, I messaged her saying it would be good for the children to see her and for her to suggest some third party individuals that we both trust. She replied saying I suggest my sister, I said no then she said I suggest my sisters husband, again I said no and told her not to argue with me and not to use this as a platform to argue as this is about the children. She then said I only have my sister and her husband as I have nobody in the UK. I said to her think about it and suggest some reasonable names. again she said I have no one in the UK.

What I fear is that she is being unreasonable and this may show to the social workers that we can not work things out which may affect the children? What do you guys advice?

We will go through the contact centre route, I started the process and will get the forms soon but this will take at least 6 weeks to setup.
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#2
Cant u suggest someone yourself that you trust that is willing to go along? Maybe you could supervise contact yourself depending on their ages. How old are your children? If you come
up with a suggestion and its very reasonable it will paint you in a very favourable light . If you go through a contact centre i am not sure who would be asked to pay for it but i know it can cost minimum of £40 a hour upwards . normally supervised is 2 hours
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#3
(05-31-2018, 07:25 PM)warwickshire1 Wrote: Cant u suggest someone yourself that you trust that is willing to go along?  Maybe you could supervise contact yourself depending on their ages. How old are your children?  If you come
up with a suggestion and its very reasonable it will paint you in a very favourable light . If you go through a contact centre i am not sure who would be asked to pay for it but i know it can cost minimum of £40 a hour upwards . normally supervised is 2 hours

The problem is, most people after they knew what she did are not talking to her. So some mutual friends are not talking to her anymore. That is why I asked her to come up with some suggestions herself. I will ask one more person and if they do not accept then I will go back to her and say, I have spoken to some people about contact that we both trust, but they are not comfortable doing it.  Also if I am present, she will use it to argue with me infront of the children (9 and 3 years old)

I am happy to pay for the contact centre and I am actually the one who looked for one and found one that will accept us. Further I will print the form and send it to her to fill in her part as she does not have an email address.
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#4
So I spoke to the social worker saying that she is being unreasonable and that she keeps on saying that she can not recommend anyone else aside from her sister and her sisters husband because she does not have anyone. The social worker said that she will speak to her and I promised her that I will try to find someone, explaining that I already spoke to a couple friends of hers who said that they do not want anything to do with her anymore. Anyways, I spoke to someone and convinced her to be the third party for supervised contact and she agreed. Hopefully this will show that I am doing my best for the children.
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