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Mother left daughter at home in favour of a long holiday. My rights?
#1
I could go with a long version but in the interests of directness I'll attempt to get to the point as quickly as possible. I would be very thankful for any opinions, from personal experience or not as I am currently vague on how far my rights may go in this situation. 

Ok, first, the background. . . 


- I have been attempting to get access to my now almost eight year old daughter for the past fourteen months. Cooperated with every request made (hair strand tests, BBR) and haven't put a foot wrong. I am currently approximately two months out from the final hearing and the overwhelming likelihood is that contact arrangements will be agreed.
- I found out recently through a third party that my ex-partner was planning to take my daughter to Thailand from 8th August to 17th October without seeking permission. 
- I challenged the holiday based on the length, the time missed from school (the school rejected the application for the holiday too), my ex-partners volatile relationship with her new partner not being a positive influence on my daughter. 
- We went to court on Tuesday and although I was successful in having the holiday shortened to September 17th as opposed to October 17th, she was allowed to take her and it was my understanding that both my ex partner and daughter left the following day. During this hearing my ex-partner said that she had "no issue" with contact. Although due to a highly spiteful nature I believe this was just an attempt to get what she wanted on the day and was something that she would later backtrack on.
- Today I discovered that my daughter did NOT leave with her mother and was instead left with extended family. I am assuming that the reason is because she and her partner did not want their planned two and a half month holiday to be cut short by the small matter of a court order that my daughter would need to be back in school by September 17th. The solution? Don't take her. This was likely ordered by her current, dominant partner as my ex partner was clearly in a very good mood following the decision that she was allowed to take our daughter with her and appeared to have no real issue with the holiday end-date being cut short by one month. 


What I am curious about is how far my PR rights go in terms of possibly applying to get my daughter as opposed to her being passed around until at LEAST mid-October between three sets of her extended family on her maternal side. One an eighty year old man (grandfather), one a woman who is very physically limited (grandmother), and another who has children and her own life to get on with (aunt). 

I feel it is important for my daughter to have at least one parent in her life and have made every effort to cooperate with all requests made by Cafcass and the courts and am reaching the end stages anyway. My daughter has expressed her desire repeatedly that she wishes to see me. The situation has changed due to her mother essentially "downing tools" in her duties and I am wondering how much of a bearing that may have on my ability to gain access if I was to begin such a case. 

Any input or advice on the best course of action to take would be appreciated.
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#2
I would approach politely these people where your daughter is staying. clearing off on holiday and leaving a 8 year old behind is not child focused whatsoever. There should be no reason why your 8 year old daughter shouldnt be with you. She also said she has no issue with you having contact.

Dont you normally get access already, I would definitely be looking for some advice. what was your previous contact arrangements before court?
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#3
The insidious side of me is coming out now.

The ex is out of the country, I wouldnt see a better chance. Depending on the details and background, start shmoosing up to the grandparents right quick. Go round for a cup of tea, mow their lawn etc, the more time you spend in the presence of your daughter and her grandparents the more your ex's case is blown out of the water. Try to get involved with the school, speak to your daughters doctor.
My ex left the country on a girls holiday years ago and left our 2 year [at the time] daughter with me. She must regret it so much because it came back to haunt her badly in court after her false accusations.


What a gift

The cat is away. Have at it.
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#4
(08-11-2018, 06:32 AM)Naive Wrote: The insidious side of me is coming out now.

The ex is out of the country, I wouldnt see a better chance. Depending on the details and background, start shmoosing up to the grandparents right quick. Go round for a cup of tea, mow their lawn etc, the more time you spend in the presence of your daughter and her grandparents the more your ex's case is blown out of the water. Try to get involved with the school, speak to your daughters doctor.
My ex left the country on a girls holiday years ago and left our 2 year [at the time] daughter with me. She must regret it so much because it came back to haunt her badly in court after her false accusations.


What a gift

The cat is away. Have at it.

You were clearly very lucky that your ex left your daughter with you. I never expected something like that to happen in my case. However, the holiday with her current partner has taken priority over her spiteful necessity to keep my daughter away from me. I also know that she has basically used the threat of depriving her own mother access in the future if she entertains any prospect of granting me access in her absence, but her mother and partner have told me on the phone that they are "disgusted" with her behaviour, which is understandable. As the old saying goes "you can't defend the indefensible". 



(08-10-2018, 09:24 PM)warwickshire1 Wrote: I would approach politely these people where your daughter is staying. clearing off on holiday and leaving a 8 year old behind is not child focused whatsoever. There should be no reason why your 8 year old daughter shouldnt be with you. She also said she has no issue with you having contact. 

Dont you normally get access already, I would definitely be looking for some advice. what was your previous contact arrangements before court?

I don't get access. Last time was June 2017. All I have had since then is indirect contact through cards and gifts. Previous arrangement before contact was broken was Wednesday after school and then take her to school the Thursday morning and Saturday morning to Sunday evening. Plus I was always willing whenever possible to be available to pick her up from school, clubs etc. at short notice, even after relations got bad between me and my ex. Mainly because I wanted to spend as much time as possible with her and she shouldn't suffer because of poor relations between her parents.
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