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I had an affair and walked out - guilt wrt to chldren
#1
Let me be honest. My marriage had deteriorated. I had an affair. I walked out. I am still with 'other woman' after 3 years. My ex and 2 children (daughter 17, lad 14 at time, 3 years ago) were in total shock. My family were in total shock. Apart from my Mother I was totally ostracised. I was not a brilliant Dad when children were in later teens before split (nothing bad but a little selfish). I am lucky in that I still  get to talk to my children every 2 weeks. They said they forgave me about 2 years ago but refuse to see me. You might say I deserve this after what I did. I don't know, maybe I do, but I do know that I love and miss my children very much. I used to have massive guilt trips and sometimes still do, but now I am profoundly sad at how I went about leaving and the situation with my children. Rather than getting better the 2 weekly phone calls seem to be getting more one sided and strained. I want to do as much as I can to stop the relationship deteriorating further and become totally estranged. I fully regret how I went about things but I need advice from others out there on what is the best way of improving relationships with my children please?
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#2
(09-04-2016, 02:56 PM)arthuraskey Wrote: Let me be honest. My marriage had deteriorated. I had an affair. I walked out. I am still with 'other woman' after 3 years. My ex and 2 children (daughter 17, lad 14 at time, 3 years ago) were in total shock. My family were in total shock. Apart from my Mother I was totally ostracised. I was not a brilliant Dad when children were in later teens before split (nothing bad but a little selfish). I am lucky in that I still  get to talk to my children every 2 weeks. They said they forgave me about 2 years ago but refuse to see me. You might say I deserve this after what I did. I don't know, maybe I do, but I do know that I love and miss my children very much. I used to have massive guilt trips and sometimes still do, but now I am profoundly sad at how I went about leaving and the situation with my children. Rather than getting better the 2 weekly phone calls seem to be getting more one sided and strained. I want to do as much as I can to stop the relationship deteriorating further and become totally estranged. I fully regret how I went about things but I need advice from others out there on what is the best way of improving relationships with my children please?

In terms of a legal way forward, I do not think a court would consider an application for the 17 year old, and the 14 year hold in law is at an age where their "Wishes and Desires" would come into it.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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