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Anyone else miss the sex?
#11
Sex with my STBX, when it was good, was porn good & I have to say better than any previous partners.

Do I miss the sex? Yes, absolutely but do I miss it specifically with her? Don't think I do now. Sex with her diminished massively over the past couple of years, on the occasions we did it would sometimes be, for want of a better phrase, a good session. For the most though it was pretty much just "morning quickies" which were not much to write home about.

Living under the same roof with her still is awkward as, being a red blooded male, I do have urges & I'm not in a position to go get it elsewhere at this stage. If there was an offer one evening of a bit of "for old times sake" I'd probably take it.

I'm actually slightly worried that when I finally get to that position with a new partner/date/hook-up then my expectations may be too high in the bedroom/sofa/kitchen worktop department!
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#12
(10-01-2018, 11:14 AM)DanDad Wrote: I'm actually slightly worried that when I finally get to that position with a new partner/date/hook-up then my expectations may be too high in the bedroom/sofa/kitchen worktop department!

I think as you are aware of it you might be ok. I was like that, my previous 2 relationships in particular had me pretty spoilt. If we weren't having sex she would do plenty of the other. Always making sure I was taken care of before I left the house to go and see my mates etc.

In hindsight when I look at it I was pretty tolerant of the crap sex life with the woman i married. After the first few months it was pretty flat and in truth that was just me adjusting to her. At the beginning i was doing all the stuff I was doing with previous partners, then I just dropped down to her levels of missionary and not much else.

I only found out last week that withholding sex is one of the grounds for divorce. I probably should've divorced her before i married her!
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#13
Mine didn't mind trying things but as it became a rarity it became routine also. I guess with a lack of regular intimacy things get awkward and you don't have the closeness you need to relax . But she never seemed to just get horny, unless she was hammered. My current date texts me to say she woke up horny so masturbated to get back to sleep! Previous partners seemed to love being spontaneous. I never had that with my ex. We actually used to agreed in the morning that we'd have sex that evening. Sometimes it was a couple of days beforehand! No wonder it became shit with such a romance killer. I get the impression she only enjoys it with somebody new and for a short while.
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#14
(10-01-2018, 01:07 PM)Fatcat1980 Wrote: I guess with a lack of regular intimacy things get awkward and you don't have the closeness you need to relax .

Indeed, we had the co-sleeping situation to deal with. Since our daughter was born we hardly ever had a bed to ourselves. We'd just bought a new bed to allow us to lie together once our daughter was asleep. Its crazy to think that was the plan only weeks before she pulled the plug.

(10-01-2018, 01:07 PM)Fatcat1980 Wrote: she never seemed to just get horny

Yeh I think that tended to be a bit of an issue......I feel like when she initiated sex it was more because she thinks we probably should have sex. When she got into it I think she enjoyed it, its just she never seemed that horny and I knew her medication had that as a side affect.


(10-01-2018, 01:07 PM)Fatcat1980 Wrote: We actually used to agreed in the morning that we'd have sex that evening. Sometimes it was a couple of days beforehand!

Planned sex like that is definitely a bit of a romance killer.....i found it a bit off putting that she would even walk into the room and ask me if i wanted to go upstairs and have sex.....I would've preferred it if she just did something to let me know she fancied a bit....
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#15
LivingBate, I have a feeling that we are either the same person or were with the same woman! LOL
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#16
(10-01-2018, 01:42 PM)Fatcat1980 Wrote: LivingBate, I have a feeling that we are either the same person or were with the same woman! LOL


ha.....i guess we are all more similar than we think.....
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