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Harassment during contact time.
#41
Just back online due to all the stress this has caused me, i had to take time out and off work due to this.

Due up in court again in a few weeks but will brief whats been going on since soon.
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#42
Sorry you're having a bad time. What happened on 6th Feb?
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#43
So, after getting the court access that was only awarded in December breached I applied for enforcement, due to be heard 6th Feb.

Goes to court, ex read the riot act by the judge who tells her access is starting again, although reduced as to what was awarded in December. My arguments to the judge that by reducing my contact from what was only awarded in December was in my eyes rewarding her breach was ignored. Her application for a Prohibitive Steps order to ban me seeing my daughter altogether was dismissed. He stated this was for a limited time, so he could see if ex could go ahead with access without denials.

A week later she appealed against this dismissal and the judges awarding of access again, so back in court again. Female judge this time went ballistic at ex, I sat there an hour while ex got berated by Judge. She was warned that any further attempts to stop access will result in transfer or residency.

Week later back in front of original judge, comments to ex who she thinks she is trying to get his original decision overturned. Ex made claims she is a victim of me using coercive control over her by going to court. This was shot down by judge that is was her who was doing the controlling. Access was set to the Saturday and Wednesday until full hearing in April.

Social Workings doing Section 7 report now, they have absolutely no problems with me or my partner as far as I am aware. They have identified serious safeguarding issues regarding my ex, found evidence of psychological abuse and alienation going on and are going to file for a Child Protection Order on my daughter.

In the last week the ex has been pulled by police for a breach of the Non Mol, abusive emails and on pick up from contact centre on access days she followed me in my car for miles before I lost her, second one now, last one is still to go to CPS.
Ex is basically a car crash waiting to happen and Social Services know it. Her total life revolves around causing trouble for me and my partner and is fixated on revenge.

Awaiting Section 7 report where they should comment on access times and days to be granted. Have told them I want 50/50 access at a minimum but am willing and able to do 100% if my ex continues her campaign as i no doubt she will.

On the back of this in end of January and February the stress of dealing with courts on a weekly basis for 4 weeks got too much and I was signed off work for 6-weeks with anxiety and stress and have only just got back. I didn’t realise how much this was influencing my health so it’s something you guys also need to look out for.

If it could happen to me it could happen to anyone of us.
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#44
Wow. But you are getting somewhere. Yes look after yourself - took my partner and I months to get over the stress after 1.5 years of litigation and umpteen false accusations.
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#45
(03-21-2019, 03:45 PM)Charlie7000 Wrote: Wow.  But you are getting somewhere.  Yes look after yourself - took my partner and I months to get over the stress after 1.5 years of litigation and umpteen false accusations.
What frustrates me is the no consequences for raising multiple false allegations.
I know that i simply do not have to answer to these but ex's should be made to answer for some of the vile things they accuse you off without a shred of evidence and also where CAFCAS, Social Services have investigated and proved the claim to be false and a child coerced to lie.
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#46
I understand where you are coming from but see it this way, the ex has stopped you seeing your kids and raised false allegations against you. Cafcass and the courts have investigated and concluded their are no concerns or issues which prevent you from seeing your children and hence, this is an indirect way the courts are holding the ex's accountable for their false allegations and wasting of courts time - by not agreeing to what they are suggesting in terms of child arrangements.

Are you really in it to have the ex reprimanded for her actions or is your aim to spend good quality time with the children. The courts and Cafcass have all seen these allegations before and they will just be ignored unless she can put some firm evidence on the table.

You appear to be in a strong position, make sure it stays that way by ignoring any dross the ex is throwing your way and most important of all, stay healthy and fit
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#47
Good advice by Leader - and yes the ex has "lost" when the court finds in your favour - and that will send a clear message to her that this won't work. I agree though, morally it is so wrong that someone can make false accusations and it not be a punishable crime. But this is the family court and they look at the childrens best interests - which are to have regular time with both parents. Sending one parent to prison is going to cause problems for the child. Although frankly, I agree - if anyone is found to make false accusations against the other parent, then residency should be transferred and the one making the accusations have some penalty - eg community service for a while. But again they look at the best interests of the children in terms of stability and the fact they're not supposed to know about half of this adult stuff going on or to think of either of their parents as "bad".

But there should be a line. There are cases where a Dad has been falsely accused of serious child abuse - and no punishment for that? I know of a case where an ex accused the Dad of looking at child porn on a PC but the Judge just laughed it out of court recognising it for what it was - because he'd been having contact for years and had just met a new partner.

You would also think people would be punished in some way for lying. But not in family courts. Apparently half the battle for a court is to work out who is telling the truth and they are used to people lying.
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#48
So, had a visit from the SW who carried out the S7 report to go over and discuss it with me before Monday’s court hearing.

To say its critical of my ex is an understatement and is bordering on nuclear in describing her mental health, complete disregard of court decisions and ongoing campaign of alienation.

As for myself it only comments on me being argumentative towards the police, although this is mitigated as it is critical in describing how my ex would send the police to my address under the guise of child in danger simply to disrupt my access time over 7 times now.

Due to my ex the SW has raised the risk of psychological harm by her as a Level 1, zero is the highest, they are going to instigate a Child Protection Plan for my daughter. 

They have highlighted my ex’s ongoing campaign to thwart access, breach court orders, ignore molestation orders, involve my daughter in adult conversations, set my daughter up on staged video interviews to be critical about me, all along with my ex denying these actions she is continuing in being any problem and all the issues are not her fault.

SW is going to raise high concerns as to the mental health of my ex and her continuing ignoring that she has is in any way responsible for the problems going on. I’m going to raise these concerns in court on Monday, I have raised her mental health issues for 3-months now to no avail.

Should I mention that this runs in her family and that her brother committed suicide about 7 years ago or leave this out?

So court on Monday should be interesting this time as she has at last been found out for what she is doing, although it has took a year of hell from her to get to this point.
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#49
I would not rock the boat, simply sit back and let the SW report put all your points across, it appears to be weighed heavily in your favour.

As you say "she has at last been found out", so no need for you to complicate the proceedings on Monday
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#50
Update on court day.

Got more access, not as much as I wanted but the Social Worker explained this is in no way the final order, I expect in the end I will get at least 50/50 shared but we will wait and see.

In court the preliminary Section 47 was discussed, with many references contained in it with issues about the ex’s mental health and the risk of physiological harm to my daughter being caused.

So, in the afternoon after court I had to attend a child protection conference where it was to be discussed if my daughter was to be brought under a child protection order. Again, many references to what my ex has been up too and her mental health issues. The main point being that myself, school, police, and social services agreed there was a risk and agreed this protection order was in the best interests.

What gets me is that even after the police detailed the times they have attended my address and found the 999 call about a child in danger being malicious, social services and school finding claims about me being fabricated, I end my partner still must jump through hoops and have initial access monitored. Double standards or what.

Ex is trying her best to turn over a new leaf and be as nicely, nicely as possible during handovers, even to the point she suggested me, my partner, her and my daughter all go out for a meal sometime….. Possibly because she at last sees the position she is in and is worried about the outcome.

On another note my partner was contacted by the police on Friday regarding the breach of the Non Mol back in November, 10 days after I had it granted. Police say they have had the go ahead to prosecute from the CPS so that could potentially tip her over the edge so were in a bit of a pickle now if this is the best option to go ahead.
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