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Problem with child agreement plan
#1
Sad 
My ex agreed to the weekend's plan proposed by myself (i have prove in the messages) and two weeks after she denied. 
I planned my weekends already and now she saying that she will not pick kids from the school in agreed days.

Its very frustrated because communication with her is nearly impossible.

Is there anything what i can do in this situation please?
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#2
If it's just an agreement there is nothing you can do when she changes her mind and goes back on it. Except get a court order that she has to stick to or she's in contempt of court. To get a court order you need to try mediation first. Google mediators in your area and ring round them and either take the earliest appointment or go wiht the one you like the sound of. Your first appointment is on your own and is a mediation, information, assessment meeting (MIAM). You just explain the issues. That is the legal requirement you have to fulfil before you can apply to court - having a MIAM. Although the courts expect you to have tried mediation as well. After the MIAM the mediator will contact your ex and invite her to the next meeting and you both go to the next one for mediation to start. What often happens is ex's refuse to go, or don't turn up - in which case you get signed off and are free to apply to court and can say you tried mediation but the ex didn't attend. Or they go along to the first one and it's pointless and doesn't go anywhere, and again you then get signed off and apply to court.
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#3
(02-07-2019, 10:49 AM)Unknow999 Wrote: My ex agreed to the weekend's plan proposed by myself (i have prove in the messages) and two weeks after she denied. 
I planned my weekends already and now she saying that she will not pick kids from the school in agreed days.

Its very frustrated because communication with her is nearly impossible.

Is there anything what i can do in this situation please?

Who gets the the child benefit and what was the arrangements over a typical week or 2 weeks?
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
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#4
She gets the child benefit. It was long term agreement regarding order of the weekend when Children are with me.

This what she is doing is very wrong.
It’s affecting children, myself, my work and relationship
I understand this is way of the control and she will not give up easily, but its need to be the way to stop her doing this.

As the short term solution I am thinking to stop picking them up from school, but I don’t know how to formally do it. What is the best way and who need to be informed.

Long term solution is mediation or court.

Thanks for help
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#5
I would just do mediation and court. If you try picking them up from school she could call the police and accuse you of abduction.
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#6
My problem is opposite.

E.g. we agreed on the beginning of the January sequence of the weekends. Now she realised that in valentine’s weekend girls are with her so she said to me “I am not going to pick up girls in 15th feb from school and I am not in town until Sunday “

She did this already 4 times. I informed school buy they don’t want to be involved in parents despite.

I feel controlled by this kind of the blackmail. This affects children, my job, private life and relationship.

In long therm meditation and court. However I am looking for short term solution until this.

She doesn’t seem capable of putting the children’s needs before her own, so It need to be something what I can do.
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#7
As Charlie has mentioned previously, you need a defined court order that she will need to stick to otherwise, this kind of issue will keep on happening.

All you can do is suggest to her that you have made plans for that particular weekend in question and cannot change them at such short notice.

If I was in your position then I would pick up the children on the weekend of 15th February, it will make your position that much favourable when it finally does go to court. Again, I'm assuming you can reschedule your plans for that weekend so my suggestion may not be possible.

I wouldn't mention anything about applying to court to your ex, I've seen it before where some of the ex's have stopped contact as soon as they have been made aware of court proceedings. Just get mediation initiated as soon as possible.
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#8
Unfortunately there is high cost related with changing my plans however now is the half-term (She confused me with her blackmail) so she cannot leave them at school.
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#9
What is the high cost? Do you have a holiday booked? Even a week-end away? If so you can apply for an urgent specific issues order for the holiday - 48 hours notice. And you may get a child arrangements order at the same time if you ask for it on the same application. All you need is some written confirmation of a booking for that week-end. And an email or text from recent times confirming that she should be collecting them and not you.

I had years of this and you just can't make plans based on agreements. So I never made any and was just always available to collect my son. It wasn't till I had a court order I had any option to say "no."

I would also collect them on the 15th. Could you take them with you? Valentine's day is an expensive commercial thing anyway lol. I'm sure your partner will understand if you change plans and explain.

Actually - don't think you can apply for specific issues order if it's a holiday WITHOUT the kids - sorry. What was the original arrangement for half term - half the week?

Fact is you're the parent as well and she is saying she's not available so you'll have to collect them. But if you lose out financially now, this is the time to apply to court and get all this sorted. Book a mediation appointment.

There is no short term option - she will just keep doing what she wants and the kids stuck in the middle. Short term option might be mediation - if it works. But it doesn't unless it leads to a consent order (andthen youdon't have to go to court).
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