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Ex has proposed changing the children's name to something double barrelled - advice?
#1
Hi gang - basically I'm looking for arguments against their name being changed. She can't do it without my permission, unless she goes to court.

We were married, all 4 of us had the same surname. Since divorce she has changed her name and now she is proposing changing the children's name to "Oldname-Newname"

My instincts are 100% no. But that may just be an emotional response.

What do you think and what are the good arguments against (or, I suppose, for) the change?
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#2
(05-10-2019, 08:21 AM)Tamagoto Wrote: Hi gang - basically I'm looking for arguments against their name being changed. She can't do it without my permission, unless she goes to court.

We were married, all 4 of us had the same surname. Since divorce she has changed her name and now she is proposing changing the children's name to "Oldname-Newname"

My instincts are 100% no. But that may just be an emotional response.

What do you think and what are the good arguments against (or, I suppose, for) the change?

When i was wife my ex after we got married she wanted to change the names of my two step kids to have mine or be double barrelled. 

Their dad quite rightly refused, but then did say to them they can change if they want to.  

Depending on the ages of the kids, surely she can just wait and allow the kids to make this decision when they are 16
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#3
Potential confusion as to their (kids) identity?

Much would depend on her own motives for our suing this. I think in court it would be up to her to prove the welfare benefits in doing this.

But to be honest i think a double barrelled application isn’t as easy to oppose as a full change of surname would be. It may be seen as reasonable.

Here is the case law from England & Wales though I’m not sure if there is double barrelled changes there.

https://deedpolloffice.com/change-name/c...n/case-law
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#4
I'm very much against this, I firmly believe that it should be something for the children to decide when they reach a suitable age.

Call me old school but IMO it's their given name & only they should have the choice whether to change it or not.

I wasn't married to my ex & our boys have my surname, it's what we called them, it's on their birth certificates. I'd be royally pissed if she suggested that she wanted to change that in any way now but should they wish to when their older then I'd respect their choice.
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#5
No leave surname as it is. Only time u would even consider a change if for a long period of time u got on amazingly well
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#6
I'd be 100% against this too. It has no benefit to the kids and if they are at an age where they can decide for themselves then let them but under no circumstances would i be agreeing to this if i was in your situation
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#7
I am in similar situation.. just my son name is under my wife name, so I am the one asking to let her to change it. We get married after he was born, so before we have decided not to put my name passport ( eu nationality). At that point it looked ok for him to have mums surname, same as his brother. (from her past).
Now I am having resistance from her once I ask to change his surname. Although it has a cost of financial agreement ( offered extra thousands in her favour, and she verbally agreed).
I have my priorities and she has her own financial interest only. Unfortunately Child arrangements and Surname issue is used as negotiation tool.
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#8
hope it’s not inappropriate to post a quote and link.

But this is what I recall having read with regard to double barrelled surnames. As I remember it is not seen as drastic a change as a full change of surname.

“In 2001 the Court of Appeal, when refusing permission for a change of surname, urged the parents in Re R (Surname: Using Both Parents) [2001] EWCA 1344 to consider a double-barrelled surname, relying in part on the Spanish heritage of the child and the common practice of that country. Lady Justice Hale concluded that ‘parents and courts should be much more prepared to contemplate the use of both surnames in an appropriate case, because that is to recognise the importance of both parents’ [paragraph 15].”

Obviously depends on the facts of each case. The above case has the features of the different nationalities and of the fact that it is common practise in the culture of the person applying for the change to have a double barrelled surname.

Who knows, without those two facts weighing in favour of the applicant the view of the court may have been different.

The quote above is from here:
http://kchgardensquare.co.uk/double-barr...h-parents/

Hope this helps
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#9
It is only my opinion, but I believe above all else the children’s names should remain as is until they are at an age to make that decision themselves. Most children find the process of their parent’s separation so traumatic that adding further grievances and change to the mix only increases the pain on them.
 
Saying that, if a mum (or Dad) pushes for their birth surname to be added as a double barrel then begrudgingly it seems likely a court might agree as the children are equal to them both. However if the birth mother gets remarried and wants to add her new surname from another male then that should always be a big no no Angry , unless agreed between all parties and the child is old enough to understand and agree it.
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