Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Help needed for mid week birthday contact
#1
Is SDaughters 11th Birthday next week - we have a court order states contact or indirect contact on the childrens birthdays.

I have asked to see her for half an hour, earliest I can get from work to her house is 6, so have said 6-6:30pm, quick kiss and cuddle and milkshake from Maccy D's I guess (EW doesn't get in from work until 6pm and said she wants her in bed by 7 as she has a test the next day at school so needs an early night).  EW has just refused this saying it is too late for her so no, I'm with her this weekend and see her then!

Any help please for a rapid response
Reply
#2
I am afraid unless she agrees there is nothing you can do. Cant you pick her up from school though and return daughter at 6pm. Not heard of a 11 year old going to bed at 7pm but i wouldnt bother reacting to it. Maybe you will have to celebrate birthday weekend instead.
Reply
#3
Shocked 
Run a training course every Thursday (and have done for 15+ yrs) so can't get out of the office until 5:30pm ... EW is more than aware of this, its just sods law the birthday is on a Thurs this yr!  I too am pretty sure she isn't going to bed at 7pm either  Dodgy
Reply
#4
I think on this one you probably have to celebrate your daughters birthday on the weekend due to you not finishing work until 530pm.
Reply
#5
Go back to court and get order varied to get some time with your daughter would be my suggestion. Get the indirect part removed so she has to make time for you to see her.
Reply
#6
Is this a battle worth fighting? I'd skip out of the training course for 5 mins to video call her, then celebrate with her at the weekend.
Reply
#7
(09-04-2019, 12:33 PM)MikesWife Wrote: Is SDaughters 11th Birthday next week - we have a court order states contact or indirect contact on the childrens birthdays.

I have asked to see her for half an hour, earliest I can get from work to her house is 6, so have said 6-6:30pm, quick kiss and cuddle and milkshake from Maccy D's I guess (EW doesn't get in from work until 6pm and said she wants her in bed by 7 as she has a test the next day at school so needs an early night).  EW has just refused this saying it is too late for her so no, I'm with her this weekend and see her then!

Any help please for a rapid response

I would inform you ex that you will file a C79 application at Court to Enforce the Order, if no birthday contact goes ahead as ordered.

Regarding 7pm being to late, I had contact on a Court Order for a 6 year old till 6pm. If she is putting an 11 year old in bed at 7pm, i would be putting in a call to Social Services, questioning her parenting.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
Reply
#8
Thanks MarkR, 

we all know 7pm isn't her bedtime, I strongly suspect she is saying I can't see her for the half hour as EW is also not home from work until 6pm and probably has made plans for either her parents round or going to see them with her when everyone is home.

I have sent an email politely pointing out she has the morning with Daughter, D is expecting to see me on her birthday, I am available for my contact albeit I will accept 30 mins from 6pm, and it would be helpful if she could be seen to encourage and facilitate this contact for our daughter.  I have also said to confirm if she is refusing my contact by return in writing by tonight and if I hear nothing I will be there at 6pm on her birthday.   

I've not missed a birthday yet, and don't intend to start, I may only have 7 more until aged 18 she decides she'd rather spend it with friends!   

Rolleyes
Reply
#9
(09-05-2019, 11:41 AM)MikesWife Wrote: Thanks MarkR, 

we all know 7pm isn't her bedtime, I strongly suspect she is saying I can't see her for the half hour as EW is also not home from work until 6pm and probably has made plans for either her parents round or going to see them with her when everyone is home.

I have sent an email politely pointing out she has the morning with Daughter, D is expecting to see me on her birthday, I am available for my contact albeit I will accept 30 mins from 6pm, and it would be helpful if she could be seen to encourage and facilitate this contact for our daughter.  I have also said to confirm if she is refusing my contact by return in writing by tonight and if I hear nothing I will be there at 6pm on her birthday.   

I've not missed a birthday yet, and don't intend to start, I may only have 7 more until aged 18 she decides she'd rather spend it with friends!   

Rolleyes

In fact, if a CAO is made, except for when a person has learning difficulties or other disabilitys it expires on the 16th birthday.
Posts made by me are my opinion and any factual information should be checked out. If you do not have a Solicitor, often your local CAB can get you some initial advice.
Reply
#10
My comment was more tongue-in-cheek tbh, wife has a 21yr old and can think of nothing worse than spending his birthday evening with any of his parents when friends are suggesting pub etc.  In fact, both wife's children are now "young adults" and this year neither wanted to come on the family summer holiday - both went on their own with friends this year and made us realise that my eldest is now 14 so we may only have 3 or 4 summer holidays left with my 2 children wanting us all to be together.     Sad

Interesting point though thanks MarkR, I nor my wife realised CAO's end at age 16, I'm sure there are many others that didn't either!   

Havn't heard back from EW re D's birthday so will be there are 6pm, I know some will say why argue the point over 30 mins but our last conversations a couple of weeks ago she did say she wanted to see me and I think she would be more disappointed if I hadn't argued my corner for even 30 mins even if it is just a hug and time for just a Mcflurry each 

Not looking forward to sending over my Xmas dates .. no doubt she will be awkward again!   Sad
Reply


Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Help needed - Ex stopped all contact between my son and me. dannym1213 17 13,699 06-26-2018, 07:46 PM
Last Post: Charlie7000
  Advice needed re contact and ex who has moved away!! Contact issues 4 5,433 11-09-2017, 01:07 AM
Last Post: Charlie7000
  Contact Order help needed asap Mikeymike 29 28,926 07-21-2017, 04:47 PM
Last Post: MikesWife
  Help needed - Contact Order being ignored by the Mother sloth 11 16,775 02-13-2017, 09:07 PM
Last Post: sloth
  Advise needed re no telephone contact with my children Mike123 1 4,295 06-09-2016, 07:01 PM
Last Post: MarkR



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)