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New partner
#1
Just after a bit of advice. I’ve had a new partner for a couple of months or so now. Things generally good. We meet up about once a week and speak by phone most nights as there’s an hour and half distance by car.
There’s been a couple of times she’s got a bit funny on the phone, basically hung up on me. It seems to be driven by me talking about kids access / ex and I suppose when I’m venting a bit on that. Nothing aimed in her direction I may add and I’m more than happy to listen to her concerns / problems etc. she’s also been a bit nasty in one or two of her comments at times but most of the time is fine.
Just trying to get a feel if this is normal and something to run with or perhaps a warning sign. She doesn’t have her own kids and my gut feel is she doesn’t like the attention being distracted away from her (perhaps part the reason for her wanting a call most nights) but at same time I don’t want to be overly harsh and she does struggle with medical issues (perhaps struggles with other peoples burdens so to speak on top of her own).
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#2
(09-24-2019, 07:58 AM)Phil80 Wrote: Just after a bit of advice. I’ve had a new partner for a couple of months or so now. Things generally good. We meet up about once a week and speak by phone most nights as there’s an hour and half distance by car.
There’s been a couple of times she’s got a bit funny on the phone, basically hung up on me. It seems to be driven by me talking about kids access / ex and I suppose when I’m venting a bit on that. Nothing aimed in her direction I may add and I’m more than happy to listen to her concerns / problems etc. she’s also been a bit nasty in one or two of her comments at times but most of the time is fine.
Just trying to get a feel if this is normal and something to run with or perhaps a warning sign. She doesn’t have her own kids and my gut feel is she doesn’t like the attention being distracted away from her (perhaps part the reason for her wanting a call most nights) but at same time I don’t want to be overly harsh and she does struggle with medical issues (perhaps struggles with other peoples burdens so to speak on top of her own).

I've had this with a girl i was seeing last year.  Same as what you've said. met 1 or 2 times a week.  Knew i was a dad but seemed to not like the kid talk
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#3
I am the girlfriend with no kids, and it can be hard at times

When I met my partner, things were apparently great between him and the ex, a mature set up with child arrangements and her already having a new boyfriend

Those great arrangements seemed to be conditional on Dad being there for her and not having his own life....

Whilst any new partner wishes to accept the children and their place in their Dad's time and life, it can tip too far when there are problems and encroach on the new relationship. The majority of my relationship with Dad and the extended family has been based around them moaning to me about her. She got the whirlwind romance, the white wedding etc, I have got the fallout of their marriage. I've been more than willing to accept he has other responsibilities, but we all like some romance too.

I'm sure your girlfriend is not unsympathetic, but really in the early days of a new relationship, maybe keep your venting about your previous relationship for another ear?
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#4
Thanks for the insight Stoneangel. I'm not overly venting just rears it's head now and then. From what you're saying there's frustration and possibly jealousy (not saying that's the case for you).
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#5
My previous GF seemed more than happy to moan at me about her ex and her kids. As soon as I mentioned anything about my ex or kids she'd clam up like I was talking to her about the end of the world.

I'm not seeing her anymore. The entire relationship revolved around her and only her.
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