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It never ends, any advice on how to protect ourselves?
#1
After many years of dealing with a nasty piece of work and batting away unfair comment and accusations, I was successful via the courts in getting full 50/50 shared care over my children.

However, months after being successful and my children now verbally saying they wanted to live with me fulltime, I was rudely awoken by the police and arrested for sexual assault on my ex-wife during our marriage.  A vile and disgusting lie to attack me, my character, and a hope I’ll be convicted on something and end up losing the kids I have just fought so hard to get.

I was released pending investigation so no charges, and currently awaiting to find out what they will do, which could take months. I of course hope it doesn’t go to trial, and not because there are any doubts about my innocence, this is 100% a malicious accusation by a disgusting liar. But  because I do not want my name printed in the local press which they will do, as people often think no smoke without fire.

Anyway, my question is, I hope the police see this for what it is and end the investigation with no further actions, but is there anything I can do, or take out to protect myself from future accusations and attack on me from the warped individual?
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#2
Terrible allegation, sorry to hear.

Was this allegation raised during the family proceedings? If it was, well it has been considered in law. If it was not, the obvious question would be 'why'?

I hope the police will see the malicious motives behind this and take no further action.
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#3
My goodness...hang in there.

My arguments would be as follows:

1) Why has this only been raised by the ex now
2) It is convenient for the ex to raise this allegation now given that child arrangement proceedings have not gone her way

I would think that once this allegation is dismissed as being malicious, then in the future the police would think twice were your ex to raise other allegations against you.
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#4
Thank you both.
 
JamW. No, it was not raised during the proceedings, but she did apparently start the complaint after I 1st took her to court, but she backed out I have since been told. I am 100% convinced she backed out because she decided that it would look bad on her when they find out it’s a malicious lie. But now the family courts have run their path and I was successful, she is clearly bitter hearing the kids say they want to live with me so has decided to go for it again as she has nothing to lose (so to speak).
 
Leader1978. As above for why now, she lost the 50/50 battle to me and now the kids are starting to see her for what she is, they are making more noise about being with me and she wants to hurt me and for there to be reason for the kids to be removed from me.
 
I really hope they do see it for what it is, rather than me have to publicly defend myself (although I am willing to do so). But if she can do this, I am genuinely concerned what she might try next, with real worries she might be mentally unhinged.
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#5
Just to add for reassurance that no information would ever be released to the press unless convicted. It’s tough but stick it out and she’ll be seen as the liar she is.
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#6
Just to give you reassurance I was in a similar situation and ex wife went and told the police lies about being sexually assaulted by me during out marriage. I was visited by police officers and was asked to go in for an interview on voluntary basis. I could bot believe my eyes what a horrible lies ex had told the police. I answered all questions and to be hones broke down during interview. Police never charged me and wrote a letter to me to take to family court saying no charges were against me. So the officer rang ex and told her there was no charges against me my ex got angry and abused the officer. The officer referred her to mental professions and that was end of it.
I am still having to do fact finding but police disclosures are helping me massively.
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#7
(01-13-2020, 02:12 PM)Sb1353 Wrote: Just to give you reassurance I was in a similar situation and ex wife went and told the police lies about being sexually assaulted by me during out marriage.  I was visited by police officers and was asked to go in for an interview on voluntary basis. I could bot believe my eyes what a horrible lies ex had told the police. I answered all questions and to be hones broke down during interview.  Police never charged me and wrote a letter to me to take to family court saying no charges were against me. So the officer rang ex and told her there was no charges against me my ex got angry and abused the officer.  The officer referred her to mental professions and that was end of it.
I am still having to do fact finding but police disclosures are helping me massively.

I’m glad it’s working out for you, that is positive.
 
Sadly, the police didn’t give me that option, instead it was an early morning call making me initially panic my family had been in an accident, as there is NO reason for me to be in trouble with them. 4 coppers and two 2 cars for me at 5:40am…. All for a lie from a vile human….
 
I also answered all their questions and broke down. It’s a terrible experience to have to defend yourself against hideous lies when the impact of those words can have such devastating implications on your most loved. I am thankfully well supported by my family, but the waiting around is unpleasant, which is why I am so keen to put things in place after this to try and stop it happening again.
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#8
(01-13-2020, 03:13 PM)Goetia Wrote:
(01-13-2020, 02:12 PM)Sb1353 Wrote: Just to give you reassurance I was in a similar situation and ex wife went and told the police lies about being sexually assaulted by me during out marriage.  I was visited by police officers and was asked to go in for an interview on voluntary basis. I could bot believe my eyes what a horrible lies ex had told the police. I answered all questions and to be hones broke down during interview.  Police never charged me and wrote a letter to me to take to family court saying no charges were against me. So the officer rang ex and told her there was no charges against me my ex got angry and abused the officer.  The officer referred her to mental professions and that was end of it.
I am still having to do fact finding but police disclosures are helping me massively.

I’m glad it’s working out for you, that is positive.
 
Sadly, the police didn’t give me that option, instead it was an early morning call making me initially panic my family had been in an accident, as there is NO reason for me to be in trouble with them. 4 coppers and two 2 cars for me at 5:40am…. All for a lie from a vile human….
 
I also answered all their questions and broke down. It’s a terrible experience to have to defend yourself against hideous lies when the impact of those words can have such devastating implications on your most loved. I am thankfully well supported by my family, but the waiting around is unpleasant, which is why I am so keen to put things in place after this to try and stop it happening again.

I am sorry to hear you are going through this.

If you are being accused of these things at a particular time and place - cross reference these details against your digital history.

What do I mean? I for example have my phone's location services switched on all the time. This way my android phone logs my location against a time continuum. 

Google timeline can present to me where I have been at any given time. I do this to protect myself against any allegations.

Good luck.
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#9
(01-13-2020, 03:27 PM)proud_dad Wrote: I am sorry to hear you are going through this.

If you are being accused of these things at a particular time and place - cross reference these details against your digital history.

What do I mean? I for example have my phone's location services switched on all the time. This way my android phone logs my location against a time continuum. 

Google timeline can present to me where I have been at any given time. I do this to protect myself against any allegations.

Good luck.

Thank you, and that is great advice. However, on this occasion it wouldn’t assist me as no set dates have been given, she gave a “rough” time period over years during our marriage. It is word against word really as no one can verify as only us two in bed together at night which is why she has chosen it that way. A scheming liar
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#10
ok so you been released under investigation at moment. Have any conditions been given which will be on bottom of slip saying what you can and cant do .
Are you still able to see your children as normal despite this serious accusation she has made?

Did they confiscate your mobile and laptop etc to assist with investigation?
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