Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Here we go again
#1
Had a final hearing in March. Had applied for residency and specific issues. Went in with alternating weekends and half school holidays, and left with the same, but a lives with both order instead of contact. I would have gotten midweeks had I lived closer, the distance to sons school is far and he is left too tired from the travel so I was caught with a lenient court giving ex a strong warning but not actually doing anything . Ex was destroyed on the stand by my barrister so I did think ex would calm down after the hearing but she still alienates. I am meant to pick son up tomorrow for 10 days half-term with me. Today ex writes that she is suddenly self isolating based on GP letter because she has sickle cell anaemia (she does) so son can no longer see me. After 2 months of lockdown now she has to isolate? And what court will punish her for breaching if she is self isolating ? I might not see son for several months now again. Son lost almost all of 2019 with me, this is the last thing he needs. 

What can I do right now? Im guessing nothing.
Do you think a court will believe ex is doing this for genuine health concerns considering her disease, or is it obvious she intends to mess about ?? 

Honestly so fed up of this
Reply
#2
I think there is a certain amount of BS in her story.

I am shielding due to a underlying autoimmune condition which has damaged my lungs. If your ex has sickle cell (or any variation thereof) she should be shielding. But not if she is simply a carrier. The letters from the NHS went out in late March with some added to the NHS list by GPs and getting their letters in April (me). If she is shielding, she isn't workinh other than from home and yiur child may not be at school. Do you live alone and are you working? If not, then there is no risk to your son coming to stay with you. You need - as you say - to get this in writing.
Reply
#3
Thanks Chi. Sorry to hear you are at risk. I dont know how it works but why would she only receive a letter now? I think she is lying but dont want to call her out on it just in case she has gotten a letter.

I do not live alone I live with my partner, however, both of us have been isolating since march when lockdown began and following guidelines.
As far as I know, ex has not been working. son has been coming and going and it doesnt make sense to 2 months in now stop contact, 1 night before half-term.

So do you think I should just reassure her that im not working and son can continue to come? She claims her hematology consultant has told her she should not have allowed any face to face contact this entire time, thing is, she doesnt even do handover. her partner does!

I had a draft for her saying son can live with me if she wants to shield but should I call her bluff on shielding? It can backfire if she did receive a letter and Im seen as insensitive.

and yes son is not in school since march 20th. he is homeschooling
Reply
#4
I think her story about a haematologist is more BS. She would not have just got a letter now. She would have received it in April. I did and mine was late.

[edited] His mum is home shielding. You're home, your partner is home. So if you have been socially distancing, what risk is there?

That should be your argument. And yes, you need to say you will take your son for 10 days.
Reply
#5
Thank you! My concern is, youre a scientist you get it, but the court isn't.

I read this:

Check number 4 under "Who is ‘clinically extremely vulnerable’?". It includes sickle cell.
Then under "Staying at home and shielding" it says:
"The Government is currently advising people to shield until 30 June 2020 and is regularly monitoring this position."

Either she is lying or she is one clever b**ch!
Reply
#6
Sorry. It was a rhetorical question. You'll place your son and your ex at minimal risk. She's exaggerating.

Yes. It does say that. But if you go to the Sickle Cell Society we page, it says it does not apply to carriers.
Reply
#7
Forgot the link : https://www.gov.uk/government/publicatio...m-covid-19

Thats what she said in her email:

"Just to let you know that I received an updated letter yesterday from the NHS as they have identified me as someone at risk of severe illness if I catch Coronavirus due to my sickle cell disease. I have been told to stay at home at all times and avoid all face-to-face contact.

I spoke to my hematology consultant this morning about it and I was told that I shouldn’t have let physical contact between xxx and you to take place as it increases the risk of catching the virus. The letter is stating that I have to shield until 30 of June 2020 and therefore direct contact can’t continue between xxx and you. I will inform you as soon as I have more updates as this information is regularly monitored by the NHS.

etc... "

(05-20-2020, 11:53 PM)Chi21965 Wrote: Sorry. It was a rhetorical question. You'll place your son and your ex at minimal risk. She's exaggerating.

Yes. It does say that. But if you go to the Sickle Cell Society we page, it says it does not apply to carriers.


How can I find out if she is a carrier ? And what is the other alternative if she isn't a carrier she would be a ?
Sorry for all the dumb questions
Reply
#8
If she is a carrier, she does not need to shield and it is an excuse. That is the advice of the Sickle Cell Society.

"This includes all patients with sickle cell (e.g. HbSS, HbS Beta thalassaemia, HbSC, HbSD, HbSO).

Please note that this does not apply to people with sickle cell trait (sickle cell carriers) – read more about trait here"

https://www.sicklecellsociety.org/corona...#Shielding

Did she ever get sick from her sickle cell? Lack of symptoms means she has trait and not disease. If it's trait she does not need to shield and you should have access to your son.

And don't worry, the court is used to nit-picking detail. They will get it.
Reply
#9
Thank you Chi. I have no idea, I was only with her for a few months (and now Im paying for it with the rest of my life!)
According to some of her court statements she gets sick and suffers (she tends to play martyr), but Ive never seen it myself or heard of it from son. I know son has trait and not the disease. Ha just realised I can check her statement see what it says!

When lockdown started I was expecting her to cut all contact blaming sickle cell and was surprised she didnt. Does seem weird she would receive a letter now especially with halfterm coming up. She is a compulsive liar so yeah at very least she is exaggerating. Not like court would ever ask her to show proof of her disease or trait etc.
Reply
#10
There was indeed an updated letter which went out the 5th May. I can't see how it is different, other than perhaps extending the date of shielding until 30th June.

I'm sorry, but I doubt *very much* that she had any kind of call with her haematologist. They don't do that normally and I doubt they'd do it now, but just refer back to her GP.
Reply




Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)