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Equitable accounting
#1
Since separating 2 years ago, I've payed the mortgage, all bills and all of my wife's personal expenses in full every month as my stbx completely refused to work.

This is a significant amount of money. I have no issue with paying the mortgage and all bills but I have also funded her social life, including her dates with boyfriends and nights out with friends. This seem morally wrong and I think it would be much fairer to only pay the mortgage and household bills - any personal expenses should be funded by herself.

There are several examples of case law where equitable accounting principles have been applied to mortgage payments. What this means in practice is that where one person has continued to pay all household costs, the spouse's unpaid contribution is then deducted from the divorce settlement.

We've been separated for 2 years and I would like to request that my stbx's unpaid contribution is deducted from the divorce settlement. Am I within my rights to request this? The figure is not insignificant (around £20K).

What is a court's view likely to be? I understand that equitable accounting is open to interpretation and could be ignored by a court.
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#2
(05-22-2020, 07:42 PM)alexroutledge Wrote: Since separating 2 years ago, I've payed the mortgage, all bills and all of my wife's personal expenses in full every month as my stbx completely refused to work.

This is a significant amount of money. I have no issue with paying the mortgage and all bills but I have also funded her social life, including her dates with boyfriends and nights out with friends. This seem morally wrong and I think it would be much fairer to only pay the mortgage and household bills - any personal expenses should be funded by herself.

There are several examples of case law where equitable accounting principles have been applied to mortgage payments. What this means in practice is that where one person has continued to pay all household costs, the spouse's unpaid contribution is then deducted from the divorce settlement.

We've been separated for 2 years and I would like to request that my stbx's unpaid contribution is deducted from the divorce settlement. Am I within my rights to request this? The figure is not insignificant (around £20K).

What is a court's view likely to be? I understand that equitable accounting is open to interpretation and could be ignored by a court.

From reading one of your previous posts in which you suggested there was equity in the home of around £10k, give or take from this number as you would have paid off some additional capital since the original post; there appears to be very limited equity to be divided out between all the parties. 

How old are your kids?  The courts will appreciate that your ex was a stay at home mother to look after the kids when they were at a young age however, they would expect her to work if your kids are in full time education.  Sorry to be blunt - what incentive does she have to get a job if you have been content on paying the mortgage and funding her lifestyle for the past two years?  If this ever went to court, which I would not encourage given the limited amount of equity in the home unless there are other significant assets available, the issue you would have is that you have set a precedent for the last two years in the contributions you have been making to your ex. 

Is there a case open with CMS, I would suggest using the online calculator and getting an indication as to what you should be paying for supporting the children as a minimum.  From there, you can top that amount up if affordable if your ex is being amicable.  I would suggest mentioning to your ex as to what the CMS amount due is, hopefully then she will realise that she is actually benefitting from the fact that you are contributing more than you need do.
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#3
I’m going to be very blunt from my own experience.
You need to start playing dirty. I’d rather allow the house be repossessed than be faced with financial slavery.
Especially if we’re talking about £10k equity.

I got what I wanted by being made redundant and being prepared to let the house be taken to get her off her arse.

Start artificially maximising your outgoings on legitimate targets to deprive her of your finances.

Hire an office for work, get an expensive mobile, phone contract Pay as much as you can into a pension, inflate your rent and as said above go by the child maintenance amount and be prepared to lose the house.
Also take regular cash withdraws under £150 and stick it into someone else’s bank account who you trust.
You’re longer term better off than allowing an ex love off your back.
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#4
Thanks for all your replies.

I'm not sure if it was a typo or my original post was misread but the equity in the property is £219K.

The equity is easily enough to support a rental property or shared ownership property. My kids are 6 and 9 so I don't want to be tied to a mortgage unless I'm living there. As I'm the only one who can afford to make the mortgage payments, I would like to buy her out if the property.

Sounds like I need to be a bit tougher on the money my ex has access to!
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#5
Ok, well the first problem has already been mentioned.
You’ve set a two year precedent of paying and she has become accustomed to that hence she will naturally find it harder to adjust should you take it away.

First thing to remember is The court can only look back twelves months of your financial history at the point of applying for divorce. So I would prepare in advance before you apply or give her any idea you’re thinking about it.

My advice is you need to become a hollow man financially to the best of your ability in the lead up to any divorce.

Transfer savings to someone you trust implicitly then you’ll need to wait twelve months before you apply to court.
At the same time start inflating your living costs the maximum you can and wait at least next twelves months, then you can legitimately claim you can no longer afford the mortgage.

If she can afford at least half or all the mortgage then the court can get you off it but your waiting until the eldest has left school before you see a share of it.
If she can’t afford to buy you out or afford the mortgage then there is potential for her to sell up and get a smaller house.

The vital thing here is you need to prep before divorce and you need to find a legit reason after making yourself financially hollow why you cannot afford her life. Redundancy, pay cut, inflate your own living costs significantly, throw big sums into a work scheme pension.

I hired an expensive office share for work purposes. Also if possible accumulate some debt if you can with the full intention of being able to pay it off quickly after divorce. Get inventive

My divorce was tough though, there was no mutual respect so no prisoners taken.
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