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Finding a Fact Hearing
#71
So undertakings should be a temporary thing, like pledged in a DRA....

should never take an undertaking in a final hearing ...

is that right?
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#72
I would never have done it if it was a final hearing. What I do with my children in my time is my business same goes to the mother. I know it is wrong as she can do whatever she wants with the children but I have to do this.
The other thing they wanted me to do to agree to a consent order so she can have residency. No chance
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#73
(11-16-2020, 08:09 PM)BirminghamUK Wrote: So undertakings should be a temporary thing, like pledged in a DRA....

should never take an undertaking in a final hearing ...

is that right?

If its not a final hearing and you are asked by otherside to do an undertaking , its best to accept if its unsupervised contact otherwise you
will be left with no contact at all if you dont accept until final hearing. This then results you waiting a few months to get the same contact you otherwise would of got by taking an undertaking which is only interim anyway.  

I do also mean in circumstances where you are not already getting unsupervised contact and taking an interim undertaking been the only way possible to do so.
I would absolutely not at a final hearing, the judge already knows what is going on otherwise contact wouldnt have been offered otherwise

(11-16-2020, 08:14 PM)Sb1353 Wrote: I would never have done it if it was a final hearing. What I do with my children in my time is my business same goes to the mother. I know it is wrong as she can do whatever she wants with the children but I have to do this.
The other thing they wanted me to do to agree to a consent order so she can have residency. No chance

At final hearing you could potentially agree by consent to your ex having residency in return for a good contact order. Family courts will order this eventually anyway.
If you have a good contact order and hopefully it doesnt for kids sake, but if mum become unwell where she was incapable of looking after children for a while then you would  get residency fairly easy as wouldnt be a huge change.

Nearly all contact orders are built up gradually to somewhere between 8 -12 nights  when there are loads of issues between parents  and things eventually finally get sorted out with no safeguarding issues
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#74
I would agree with consent order if she offered shared care/ live with both parents 50/50 or near that.
I am hoping she is fine and recovering as I think children will need her in their lives. However, if her health as massive impact on her ability to care for the children I’d like to be the main carer so children have stability. We are way away from this as we don’t know her prognosis. The last thing I want is taking the. Hidden off her if she is really ill.
Judge would have a separate hearing with only her lawyer to discuss her illness. She is to provide supporting documents and send it directly to the Judge. Judge said if he feels that there is an issue long term then he will have to let me know.
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#75
SB1353 - isn't 'joint lives with' same as 'both parents getting residency' ?
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#76
I think it is.
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#77
(11-17-2020, 03:56 PM)Sb1353 Wrote: I think it is.

Yes it is
The opinions here are not that of Separated Dads, but merely a loving father who has been through the process and has come out the other side.
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#78
I need to add that this Judge is very experienced and is a circuit Judge. This case is reserved to him. He looks at his diary and gives us a date for next hearing.
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#79
I was meant to be going to a judge for the next one, but we only need to go now and confirm we are both happy with the arrangements
The opinions here are not that of Separated Dads, but merely a loving father who has been through the process and has come out the other side.
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#80
Good that you have a good Judge. Joint residency and shared residency (old terms) are the same thing. Now called “lives with both parents “ and/or shared care. It’s either “lives with” (residency) or “spends time with “ (contact).
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