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50/50 Shared Care and CMA
#11
I wish there was some way that you could get an independent assessment of your individual case without submitting a claim.  I'm desperate not to rock the boat - I don't want the CMS poking around my finances.  I get paid my salary each month which I want my ex to have no details of whatsoever.  I also do a bit of ad-hoc work that earns me very little and isn't taxable because of the limited income and its ad-hoc nature.  I don't want to start declaring that to her either.

Last week she attacked me, completely out of the blue. We've been getting on well.  She has offered me support and friendship following my the break up of a 15 month relationship I was in.  I got an email from her a few days ago alleging that I'd been manipulating her and "making it clear that she had no romantic of sexual interest in her".  I asked her what in God's name she was on about and she said I'd be checking her out, making her do things so I could check out her backside, doing things to make her jealous.  It's complete and utter bollocks!  I find her repellent. I have no interest in her at all other than as a co-parent and was simply building some sort of friendship to make life a bit easier.  I despise her values and all that she stands for these days.  She's a flat earther, conspiracy theorist, covid denier and thinks her phone is being tapped by the CIA.  I don't find her physically attractive anymore either since I have been in a romantic relationship with somebody who I really did have a physical connection with.

I'm sick of being bullied and taken the piss out of by this person. I work a 50 hour week. I have my kids 50% of the time and my home costs twice what hers does.  I took on the mortgage here and bought her out. She went off and rented a 2 bed flat (for her and my three kids with her boyfriend staying half the week), bought a camper van and course after course of mindless spiritual BS. The taxpayer paid for her to do a degree in physiotherapy but she chucked in physio work to be an spiritual energy healer, which she doesn't do because of the pandemic and because virtually nobody wants anyway.  She's also an experienced estate agent but won't go back to that. She spends 2 hours a day doing a course on cyber currency and claims that as work on her tax return to allow her to claim full tax credits along with the CB.  When the kids are with me, you'll find her on a beach somewhere in the UK in her camper van.  And I pay her £400pm to stop her going to the CMS because I'm under the impression that she would be awarded CM purely on the basis that she claims the CB.  Her parenting skills are questionable. My daughter tells me she found a big bag of weed in her drawer this week.  I resent paying her so so much.
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#12
So, to the OP....
I just joined the web chat option on the CMS site: https://childmaintenanceservice.direct.g...ive/public

My advisor has told me that when the situation is one of 50/50 shared care, you are not legally required to pay CM regardless of benefits and so on. If you want more info, please ask. I have kept the transcripts. I am considering putting my ex on notice now and telling her I'm going to stop paying and being treated like this. She can claim but apparently they'll call me and once I confirm it is shared care that'll be the end of it. I feel a bit more confident to tackle this.
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#13
That sounds good. Maybe that is the case of its 50/50. My shared care is about 65/35 - I was told they would assess and see which parent took child to dentist, doctor etc and that parent would be considered by then to be doing the care snd then CMS payable. As a result my ex now refuses to let me do anything like that (or just does it all herself without telling me).
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#14
I might book the dentist just to be on the safe side! She's taken them once since we split up, I think. I've certainly done at least one doctor visit and made calls to the doctor. I do their passports, their bank accounts, their savings, phones, pocket money cards, lunch accounts. She's taken them to get their school uniforms.
I'm not rushing to change things anyway. It's in the back pocket til the summer I think.
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