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Hello Rock, meet Hard Place. Ah! You're already aquainted I see!
Well the ex finally replied saying she felt her (nice use of the possessive there) daughter, made her feelings clear about contact last year (because a then 4 year old never changes their mind?) And that any further communication should go through her solicitor.

So I guess my first point of call would be to contact her solicitor and ask them why their client feels it's acceptable to breach a court order?

Then apply for an enforcement order once I have the money to do so.

Is that right?
Did she reply in writing? I would just apply to enforce now and attach her response. Just find the £215 and get the ball rolling. So wrong that we should have to pay for enforcement.
I'll have to give the cliff note summary, so bear with me!
Last court order stated weekly unsupervised contact at a contact centre for 2 months, then fortnightly unsupervised contact outside the contact centre for 2 months (with handovers being done at the contact centre for my own safety) and then overnight stays fortnightly ( again with handovers at the centre) everything was going fantastic but then suddenly (a week before things were going to progress to overnight stays) our daughter became very distressed about even going to the contact centre to see me. Literally last time I saw her she was happy and excited to see me then the next week utterly terrified and unable to let her mother be out of sight

She's a toddler, and although unexpected we agreed (via the contact centre) to slow stuff down. However this went on for 2 months and so (with the contact centres guidance) we agreed to go back to fortnightly unsupervised contact, to see if that would help, when this didn't work, we went back to supervised contact again (this may have been an error in judgement on my part, but at the time I felt having any kind of official report would help me, just so there was a written record of the drastic change in her behaviour) but each session our daughter became less and less willing to see me.

Then Covid lockdown happened and the centre had to shut down. Obviously this wasn't anything anyone could have predicted, so that's when I began to email my ex once a month requesting updates on our daughters wellbeing, requesting a monthly picture of our daughter and given her age, details of which school she would be attending.

I had no response from her for months, I asked the contact centre for help but they were unable to assist (for one, they were closed and secondly, the court order didn't say they could help beyond what the order stated)

After a year of lockdown, my case file and placement with the centre lapsed. Meaning that I would need to reapply to them to use their services.

With no way or place for contact to be established as per the court order, I was left in a position of fruitless spaffing emails to my ex with no response until July this year, where she acknowledged all my previous emails and agreed to reply within 24 hours.

Well wouldn't you know who won the pony! No response at all! So I sent another polite email chasing her up for a response.

It was our daughters birthday last Friday and I sent her a card and gift which obviously reminded my ex of my continued (and presumably frustrating) existence.

That brings us to now, where she replied to my email stating:

"I only set up this account for when you were having contact with [Daughter], so if you want to contact me further, please do so through my solicitor.

I think [Daughter] made her position clear in the contact sessions last year."

Our daughter is 5 and I guess she believes that in the entire history of mankind no child has ever changed their mind.

I've always stated from the very beginning that I have serious concerns that my ex will do everything in her power to demonize me and cause parental alienation. The contact centre has even witnessed and recorded our daughter changing, going from calling me "daddy" then "dad, but I have a normal daddy at home" to calling me by my first name (how she learnt that I don't know... Right!?) And then to calling me "man".

I've now reached the stage where I have to accept that with the current family law system, I will never get the contact I want. My ex won't face any repercussions for her actions, unless I continually lodge enforcement orders.

So at this stage, I've emailed her solicitor asking for a full explanation of why my ex is no longer willing to comply with the court order before I take further action by way of an enforcement order.

Honestly I'm almost done, I'd settle for a picture of our daughter a month an update on her development every 3 months and details of what school she'll be attending so I can get their reports.

The system is outdated and bloated and I don't know if I can go through the meat grinder again.

I'm at a loss guys.

Sorry for the long message.

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