Being Falsely Accused of Child Abuse
If you are accused of child abuse, whether sexual or violent in nature, or abuse that is supposed to have occurred in front of your children, you may find yourself on the receiving end of a ‘visit’ from Social Services, which may seem casual and friendly but is actually recorded on a computer and remains on a social services file indefinitely.
If Social Services decide not to do anything about it, there will be ‘no action taken’. It is well worth checking what is on the file in these circumstances to make sure that what has been recorded is accurate. You are unlikely to get an apology or thanks for your cooperation.
Further Action
If Social Services decide that they need to take further action, they can hold a ‘core assessment’ meeting where they can direct you to do certain things as a parent. Your child could be put on the ‘at risk’ register. If this happens, it could be that your authority over your child’s welfare may be shared with Social Services, or your child could be taken into care, or adopted into another family.Your Child’s File
Whatever information is on file about your child, it can be seen by medical professionals, health visitors, teachers and school staff, housing authorities, police, public and some voluntary workers who have contact with children, and youth workers. That is why it is important to ensure that whatever is recorded is correct.The Meeting With Social Services
Although this is often sold to people as ‘a little chat’, you should NOT treat it as such. Make sure you bring someone with you who you know and trust as a witness, and make sure you tape record the meeting. Ask everyone there whether they have any objection to you recording the meeting – they should not. Use a ‘conference microphone’ so that you get a clear definition of what everyone says. If you know what the meeting is going to be about, bring any documentation that you think will help. No matter how nice they are to you, remember they are there to do a job – which is to see whether you are an unfit parent or not. They are not paid to be kind to you.The Good News
As public bodies are terrified of being lambasted in the media, they can have a tendency to over-react to any kind of concern expressed over a child’s welfare. There does not have to be strong evidence in order to trigger a referral to Social Services. Sometimes it is simply an opinion, a suspicion, or an impression that a public employee has, although there are rules and concerns must be ‘evidence based.’Although this might seem shocking, a considerable number of referrals to Social Services are not investigated at all because they are deemed to be without merit. Although figures vary between local authorities, those that are not investigated at all amount to around 55% of all referrals. If there is genuinely nothing wrong, and the referral has been made mistakenly, or maliciously, just make sure you take the precautions described above. Act professionally, tell the truth and make sure that you do not say anything even in jest that could be misinterpreted.See our articles on Being Falsely Accused of Domestic Abuse and Being Falsely Accused of Rape on this site.
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Comments...
Hi please can someone help me last october my youngest son who was 17months at the time had an accident at creche where he tore his frenum the inner part of the top lip that joins to the gum. I took him to the doctors who said the injury could not be caused by an accident and had been done intentionally. He then forwarded us to SS the office was closed so he then had to refer us to the police, I was visited by a forensic police officer and out of hours social worker who wanted to remove my children from my care until the matter was cleared up I stated this was not possible as my parents were on holiday and my youngest child would not settle anywhere else. My cousin who is ironically a social worker asked if he could stay at my home and supervise and be the carer until the following day when we would attend the hospital and be examined by a pediatrician. The following day I was visited by not 1 but 3 social workers 2 seemed non judgemental however the last to arrive was abusive towards me she stripped me of all human rights she would not allow me to speak or ask any questions, she stressed that I could not be accompanied by anyone at the hospital my childs father was present and spoke up to say he would be attending also that we both wanted my cousin to be present. On our way to the hospital the social worker was speeding at 65mph I asked her to slow down stating that I dont speed with my children in the car to which she replied that she was only doing 60mph I then replied that it was a 50mph road at this time I was worried as my partner was following in one car, my cousin and another social worker in another car. I felt scared, vunerable, distressed and intimidated by her behaviour as she had my childrens future in her hands she most certainly felt that I was guilty. On arrival at the hospital my partner rang to ask which ward I was advised to tell him F62 when we approached the ward which was infact F64 I noticed F62 was an elderly ward so I txted my partner to advise him the correct ward. The paediatrician was amazing he asked why we had been referred to hospital I explained what my dostor had said and he stated yes in children of my sons age most cases are accidental, the relief flooded from me. He then did a full examination and the case was closed. I have had meetings since with social services with regards to a complaint of my treatment from the social worker I am now taking my complaint to a second stage and have informed the manager I will go all the way. The case has now been closed by SS but I want this removing from my childrens file is this possible?
lissa - 1 February 2012 @ 11:19 PM
My Ex has been charged with child cruelty and appears in court in the new year. Interestingly I find that social services are bending over backwards to help her and she has weekly supervised visits (at which she has tried to influence my son when out of earchot of the social worker) in addition they've sent her on 'parenting classes. I know if the shoe was on the other foot and I was the abuser I'd not be allowed to see him.but the child care/welfare system seems built for women.Don't get me wrong, if I were the abuser I'd expect the full weight of the law and no sympathy whatsover.but then I don't believe in physically chastising children.
TallJim - 16 November 2011 @ 10:30 PM
I am in hell at the minute. For 4 years I had been going through the court to try to get to see my daughter. Due to her mother's hostility there was a Social worker investigating, in May she told me she saw no problems with the mother and that she was going to recommend no change in circumstances in court, I warned her that the mother was going to do something as soon as we left court but she wouldn't listen. A final court order was made in July, I only saw my daughter once after that, her mother found out my current girlfriend was pregnant, she told me she was jealous then on the day I was meant to see my daughter again, I got a phonecall from social services telling me that there was an accusation of sexual abuse made against me. Since then my life has been ruined, not only have I been stopped from seeing my daughter, but social services have threatend to take my unborn child away from my girlfriend if she didn't leave me. She has since split up with me, I'm going to counselling but I don't think I can cope anymore. I've lost everything.
paulie_p - 5 November 2011 @ 9:05 PM
(my last post directed @ Katie)...
Jaytee - 31 July 2011 @ 8:27 AM
I know of a (female) paediatrician who's 3 year old likes to strip and run starkers round the garden even in winter...
Boys have 'bits' for a reason and it is normal for them to explore... You could try 'encouraging' clothes to cover up but it doesn't always work... Nowadays she just shrugs and laughs as he goes on a lap of the garden...
Sounds like sour grapes on the part of your ex. although social services have a duty not to view it like that... What about timelines? How long have you been split-up? Do you think this is just a reaction to you getting a non-molestation order against him?
Either way, he's not going to endear himself to anyone with comments like that the kids are dead to him... Probably he said that without thinking it through. What about - 'well if he asks to see you later, can I get in touch?'
Jaytee - 31 July 2011 @ 8:24 AM
Hi, My partner has left with the kids 3 weeks ago, she has gone to a refuge claiming domestic violence to her & domestic abuse to 2 of the kids, she has lied so much i dont know whether im coming or going, she likes to drink quite abit & used to take drugs when we 1st met but stopped that soon after as i didnt like it, ive just found out she had still been taking drugs sometimes, the thing is its her thats nasty to the kids & smacks them round the head, she has even given our 11 year old daughter a nose bleed twice, she has hit & kicked me so many times but if i retalliate or restrain her she then says ive been abusing her, i have lost of people who would verify what she is like but when i explained this to social service but i could tell they just thought i was making it up, ive not seen the kids noe for 3 weeks & its killing me, eventually when i am allowed she wants it to be in a contact center 2 hours a fortnight like im some sort of monster, will she ever get found out because the refuge, social services, solicitors & county court all seem to think she is miss wonderfull???
kitt - 30 July 2011 @ 4:56 PM
Hi, I am currently going through hell. I have been falsely accused of smacking my daughter and now she claims I touched her. My ex claims I domestically abused her. Bristol family court appear almost completely impotent and unwilling to act in case I am lying- which I am not. I tried to kill myself last year following a non- molestation order- it was full of lies. Social services are involved and they are finally figuring out my ex is a bit of a nut case. I have alleged Parental alienation syndrome.My ex is still stopping any contact despite a court order. any tips or advice?
stressed eric - 5 April 2011 @ 10:03 AM
Hi I know its normally men who post on here but I just want a mans opinion.
I have just been to a court hearing with my ex who I had to take a non molestation order against 2 weeks ago as he was tormenting the life out of me, he left me after years of mental abuse and for the first time ever I wouldn't take him back.I offered today any contact he wants said it was up to him he replied with I dont want to see the kids ever again they are dead to me, he then went on to tell the court I was obviously sexually abusing my 2 year old because he often plays with his privates he said to the judge he never wants to see the kids again but I shouldnt have them either because its not normal that a 2 year old boy touches his penis, alls I wanted was for the kids to see him they miss him and I dont know why he is using them as weapon,
katiex - 22 March 2011 @ 3:57 PM
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