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Being Falsely Accused of Child Abuse

By: Lorna Elliott LLB (hons), Barrister - Updated: 23 Apr 2018 |
 
Accused Child Abuse Social Services

If you are accused of child abuse, whether sexual or violent in nature, or abuse that is supposed to have occurred in front of your children, you may find yourself on the receiving end of a ‘visit’ from Social Services, which may seem casual and friendly but is actually recorded on a computer and remains on a social services file indefinitely.

If Social Services decide not to do anything about it, there will be ‘no action taken’. It is well worth checking what is on the file in these circumstances to make sure that what has been recorded is accurate. You are unlikely to get an apology or thanks for your cooperation.

Further Action

If Social Services decide that they need to take further action, they can hold a ‘core assessment’ meeting where they can direct you to do certain things as a parent. Your child could be put on the ‘at risk’ register. If this happens, it could be that your authority over your child’s welfare may be shared with Social Services, or your child could be taken into care, or adopted into another family.

Your Child’s File

Whatever information is on file about your child, it can be seen by medical professionals, health visitors, teachers and school staff, housing authorities, police, public and some voluntary workers who have contact with children, and youth workers. That is why it is important to ensure that whatever is recorded is correct.

The Meeting With Social Services

Although this is often sold to people as ‘a little chat’, you should NOT treat it as such. Make sure you bring someone with you who you know and trust as a witness, and make sure you tape record the meeting. Ask everyone there whether they have any objection to you recording the meeting – they should not. Use a ‘conference microphone’ so that you get a clear definition of what everyone says. If you know what the meeting is going to be about, bring any documentation that you think will help. No matter how nice they are to you, remember they are there to do a job – which is to see whether you are an unfit parent or not. They are not paid to be kind to you.

The Good News

As public bodies are terrified of being lambasted in the media, they can have a tendency to over-react to any kind of concern expressed over a child’s welfare. There does not have to be strong evidence in order to trigger a referral to Social Services. Sometimes it is simply an opinion, a suspicion, or an impression that a public employee has, although there are rules and concerns must be ‘evidence based.’

Although this might seem shocking, a considerable number of referrals to Social Services are not investigated at all because they are deemed to be without merit. Although figures vary between local authorities, those that are not investigated at all amount to around 55% of all referrals. If there is genuinely nothing wrong, and the referral has been made mistakenly, or maliciously, just make sure you take the precautions described above. Act professionally, tell the truth and make sure that you do not say anything even in jest that could be misinterpreted.

False accusations are not uncommon where one partner is looking for ways to 'punish' the other. It's not always accusations of child abuse either...often an ex will falsely accuse you of domestic violence or even rape. Our articles:
Being Falsely Accused of Domestic Abuse
and
Being Falsely Accused of Rape
offer some advice about what to do in those situations.

Check out the Separated Dads Forum... It's a great resource where you can ask for advice on topics including Child Access, Maintenance, CAFCASS, Fathers Rights, Court, Behaviour or simply to have a chat with other dads.

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Hi, my partner has been accused if making my 14 yr old niece feel 'awkward' she is really very close to us, the spare room is even called her room she is here that often and she has always had a very close bond with her uncle. She said she was feeling sick so he was rubbing her back got her some water gave her a cuddle then a kiss goodnight, all this is normal behaviour given how close a family we are and how he practically looks at her like another daughter!! I was there the whole time, my niece has added 2 lies to the story 1. The bedroom door was shut ( it wasn't I was on the landing sorting out the laundry) 2. He kisses her on the lips goodnight and has never done that before (only the week before he kissed her on the lips and said goodbye) so I know this is normal as throughout all our family we always do! Her mum (my sister) has I'm sure seen this as an opportunity to destroy my family and partner through what I can only assume as jealousy, we are both getting married and she's had some clear problems with it as has been very vocal and competitive over our weddings. She has also spoke to mutual friends (previous to the accusation) of how she doesn't like my partner and has basically tried to ruin his good name! She sent a threatening text to me 2 days ago saying she will go to the police about my 'weird fiance' if I continue to protect him against these claims!! It's torn the whole family apart as all members have rushed to my partners side to reassure him this is just wrong and cruel, my sister has took a firm stand and is hell be my on destroying him, yet she hasn't gone to the police regarding the situation!?! Surely if she felt that strongly she would have?? But we can't live with this accusation or threat anymore and have no idea where to turn or what action to take, he hasn't slept for days, he can't speak to anybody about it as it's just sick and humiliating but I need to know if there is something or someone we can turn to to help resolve this and put an end to it.
Upsetaunt - 23-Apr-18 @ 10:43 AM
Hi.. I'm so upset right now, my son who is a loving Single dad to he's two & a half year old son was accused of hurting he's sons arm. The health visitor and a lady was around my sons house to “support him because my son suffers from anxiety caused by a number of things including a road accident and he's girlfriend leaving their son when he was just 3 months old, he basically looked after him from being a new born because he's girlfriend wasnt a natural mother and she was just unable to cope with the huge change, she only changed the babies nappy a handful of times since he was a new born to the 3rd and final time she'd left. My son stood up to the mark beautifully and has dedicated he's life to he's sonthe only thing is he's been struggling with this terrible anxiety and panic attacks, so because he has problems he's been getting support every 2 weeks with the health visitor and a lady from the nursery that my grandson attends 3 times a week, this lady doesn't work at the nursery but she attends there once every 2 weeks to support the children their and any needs they might require like speech therapy or a hearing test, anyway a few days ago she turned up with the health visitor and she noticed a spot on my grandsons arm, she mentioned this to my son but didn't make a fuss, a few hours later the health visitor called my son up to tell him that she's had to call the social services but this lady told her in the car she thought it looked like a burn mark made by a cigarette, my son and I was naturally upset because the health visitor knows my son very well and she knows that my son would die for he's son. I didn't know what to do, so I took him straight to the doctors to get him checked over to confirm that it wasn't a burn just a spot that looked to me as an insect bite. She checked him over and confirmed it wasnt a burn, her words were " no there's no trauma to the skin as you'd expect to see with a burn, I told them that my son doesn't smoke and therefore it'd be impossible, plus he wouldn't harm a hair on he's head. Anyway I walked out of the doctors feeling better and more relaxed. That night an emergency team of social servicescame down and said that they still want a full medical at the hospital, they said they were happy with the home situation of were my grandson lives and they said they could tell he was well cared for and then they said something which horrified methey said they had the power to remove my grandson from my son that night if they thought he was in dangerI felt so let down by the doctor and healtj visitor and this lady who started this nonsense. I took him to the hospital for a full medical with the social services standing there, who were really nice actually,but I was still fuming and extremely upsetby the whole situation. Anyway two doctors looked at him and confirmed it was an insect bite or ringworm which I've never heard of. I was sent home with my grandson with antiseptic cream and
Suzi - 16-Apr-18 @ 2:57 AM
@ Upset mumma - a 'tap' wouldn't leave a red mark. Social Services will have to conduct an investigation. They have to protect and safeguard children.
Ana - 6-Apr-18 @ 2:49 PM
Paul - Your Question:
In need of helpI’ve had allegation towards me as a football coach.Thing is the social services have not fully investigated the allegation.I am 100% that the child have lied about the allegation.The child said that I was showing adult porn on my phone.This is untrue as my net work provided 02 have age restricted of 18+ this means that 02 will not allow this to happen, the only time this can happen is you have home WI FI.Please any information to get social services to get further investigation.I have a family to look after this is absolutely disgusted me.Please help

Our Response:
If an allegation is made from a child, then the allegation will have to be investigated, as it is the law. Much depends upon whether social services are satisfied that there is no concern. It is difficult to advise as you have not specified what has been investigated to date and how long ago this was. You can see how the procedure is investigated via the CAB link here. You may also wish to speak to social services directly if you wish to know anything further.
SeparatedDads - 3-Apr-18 @ 11:02 AM
In need of help I’ve had allegation towards me as a football coach. Thing is the social services have not fully investigated the allegation. I am 100% that the child have lied about the allegation. The child said that I was showing adult porn on my phone. This is untrue as my net work provided 02 have age restricted of 18+ this means that 02 will not allow this to happen, the only time this can happen is you have home WI FI. Please any information to get social services to get further investigation. I have a family to look after this is absolutely disgusted me. Please help
Paul - 2-Apr-18 @ 12:38 PM
My partner tapped my 4yr old daughter on the bottom as she was refused to go to sleep at 10pm and was making alot of noise and being cheeky, it left a red mark (not bruising) which i didnt notice the next day but when she went to nursery staff were helping her in the bathroomand saw the mark then referred it to social services now my partner is not allowed to stay in our family home or see my children ( i have 5) whom all ask when their dad (not biological) is coming home he has never raised a had to me or my children over the years it was not his intention to smack my daughter but to tap her bottom to reinforce what he had told her, we had both been up stairs several times to put her back to bed and told her to go to sleep from 7pm (her bed time) this happened on monday it is now friday and i have not heard anything the social services keep telling me its a police matter, the police took a statement off of me on Wednesday night, but have not spoken to my partner yet, this is ripping our family apart my children all love him and are very upset as they have not seen him since monday when i was advised he should not b allowed to stay at home, please help
Upset mumma - 30-Mar-18 @ 3:07 PM
@Traumatised- you can't take the nursery to court for checking up on your child. If there was good reason why the nursery thought SS should be called, then you have to be thankful that someone is looking out for your kid. SS get lambasted enough for overlooking possible domestic abuse - yet when they check a child, you the parents think it's an insult. That's the compensation culture for you!
AidT - 8-Feb-18 @ 2:36 PM
My 3 year old little boy bumped his ear while his dad lifted him down from his window ledge (his bed is next to his window, he steps onto the wide windowsill and hides behind his blind, he thinks it's great but we know it's dangerous and don't allow it and remove him immediately for his safety) after he pulled on the window handle while being lifted away, which jilted him, knocking his ear off the corner of the wall where it bevels into the window. When the nursery asked him how he hurt his ear his response was, my dad did it. He's only 3, I know what he said would have sounded bad but rather than ask, how did your dad do it and get the explanation of "he lifted me and I bumped it" they phoned social services. Obviously the case was closed and no further involvement from police or ss will be happening (they interviewed him, then came to my home and interviewed me and didn't even have the need to interview his dad after confirming my sons account of events with my interview) but when they first made the call my son was collected from nursery and interviewed in a police station (the school would not accommodate the interview as is usual procedure) medically examined naked, taken away by strangers and I was given no info other than that I was not allowed to collect him from nursery and not allowed to go and get him and social services we're involved, for two and a half hours I went through hell with no clue what was going on, I was literally a mess, and still feel traumatised by what happened. It feels like me and my son and his father were all put through terrible experiences over nothing and I feel the nursery is at fault. I'm nervous to even leave him there now after the experience and have been having nightmares about the whole thing since. I'm very close to my son and with him all the time, having him tore away from me by complete strangers and not being able to go to him and get him absolutely destroyed me and I feel a million times more protective over him. I'm hurt he had to be medically examined naked and go through a police interview at 3 years old. He hasn't left my side since it happened and has became clingy again after being so independent, it's affected him and me, it only lasted a short time but it's had a serious affect on us, can I take this further?
Traumatised - 7-Feb-18 @ 10:29 PM
I live with my partner. I have a child from a previous relationship and he has 2 from a previous relationship. In sept 2017 his son accused him of hitting him. It’s a lie as I was in the house at the time. His mum is bitter and trying to do anything to hurt my partner.His mum took him to the Hospital to be examined and no marks was found on him. My partner was removed from our home for a month and social services let him back home as long as I don’t leave my child un supervised but the investigation was still ongoing. The police told us it’s been sent to QPS and they’re wanting to press charges against him. It’s now the end of January 2018 and we still haven’t heard anything And my partner still can’t see his kids or make contact with them. Why is it taking so long? We’ve had no contact from the police or social workers since the beginning of December 2017 which was 2 months ago? I’m confused as to what is happening.We’ve been told that my partners ex has used this situation to her advantage and managed to get a council home out of it? How is that possible? So now he doesn’t even know where his children live.What has she done to get that? She’s the one lying but benefitting from a situation she’s putting my partner through hell. Surely she can’t get away with this. I am disgusted at social services and the council if its true. I can’t believe how men get treated in these situations. His ex is a alcoholic and violent and lies to the police yet my partner is the one getting punished. System is very sexist. It’s not always men who at fault but they’re treated like they are. Lost all faith in the police and social services after this. Thank you for reading and hope to get some answers from this post.
AnonymousMe - 31-Jan-18 @ 1:35 PM
Lls - Your Question:
Hiya. Could someone help out please? My partner who my daughter thinks is her real dad pulled her leg to stop her goin back up the stairs and she slide down a few stepsCausing friction burn on her back. Social services have taken her and she’s now staying elsewhere? He never intended to hurt her and apologised straight away. What do you think will happen? I have 2 other children which they haven’t taken I’mSo confused

Our Response:
We cannot predict what may happen. I can only direct you to Family Lives which outlines the care process, please see link here , and where you can get extra help and advice.
SeparatedDads - 16-Jan-18 @ 12:54 PM
Hiya. Could someone help out please? My partner who my daughter thinks is her real dad pulled her leg to stop her goin back up the stairs and she slide down a few steps Causing friction burn on her back. Social services have taken her and she’s now staying elsewhere? He never intended to hurt her and apologised straight away. What do you think will happen? I have 2 other children which they haven’t taken I’m So confused
Lls - 15-Jan-18 @ 8:20 PM
Some one accused me of beating my son I never touch my son I do everything for them I love them so much please I need help this issue will effect my job as taxi driver?
Deen. - 24-Nov-17 @ 10:22 PM
My 12 year old son has touch my 8 year old girl they are both saying it has stop and stop for awhile now my son has gone to stay with my sister and social services are involved my question is would social services allow my son to come if safety measures where put in place my son knows he has done wrong and swears it will never happened again and my little girl has said she is not scared of him and is happy for him to come home if it never happens again
Whattodo - 10-Nov-17 @ 1:15 PM
loulou - Your Question:
I have an eight week old baby I phoned 111 due to having every sign of meningitis except the rash or marks and then they phone ambulance they came out said she was fine I wanted second opinion so went in ambulance to hospital in hospital I noticed a purple mark on her little finger I asked what it was he said it’s fone don’t worry about it, after I had seen a few people in a and e I got put to paediatric day unit with her they checked her over said she was fine I could go home then the boss/ higher than everyone consultant came checked her over said we will have to do some bloods I will get youse moved onto a ward then they took bloods took pictures of mark then told me I had to leave my baby at hospital due to the mark being forced and now she is in care and I have been cautioned with Common assault what do I do I need my baby back

Our Response:
If your child is in care and you’re unhappy about their treatment, you can make a complaint. Talk to your child’s carer or social worker first and if you’re not happy, you can complain to your council. The Family Rights Group Advice Service helpline provides confidential support for parents, please see link here.
SeparatedDads - 10-Nov-17 @ 11:20 AM
I have an eight week old baby I phoned 111 due to having every sign of meningitis except the rash or marks and then they phone ambulance they came out said she was fine I wanted second opinion so went in ambulance to hospital in hospital I noticed a purple mark on her little finger I asked what it was he said it’s fone don’t worry about it, after I had seen a few people in a and e I got put to paediatric day unit with her they checked her over said she was fine I could go home then the boss/ higher than everyone consultant came checked her over said we will have to do some bloods I will get youse moved onto a ward then they took bloods took pictures of mark then told me I had to leave my baby at hospital due to the mark being forced and now she is in care and I have been cautioned with Common assault what do I do I need my baby back
loulou - 7-Nov-17 @ 5:58 PM
@Pod - if there is no evidence against you and no further action taken, then hopefully the court will see your side. The courts are pretty wise to some mothers pulling dirty tricks such as this. Have faith and don't give up. You have not been proven guilty, therefore you are innocent. Best of luck.
JamesD - 7-Nov-17 @ 3:49 PM
I was accused of sexual abuse from my 3 year old daughter I have been investigated by police and no further action to be taken against me as no evidence. I have been seeing my daughter since our divorce with no problem until my ex wife new partner came on scene. Ever since then I've had problems I'm actually fighting in court to see my daughter in 20 days time my 4th appearance in which my ex has never appeared to go . I'm now fearful that with all that has happened I will never be able to see my daughter even though it's been proven I'm innocent. Please help anyone
Pod - 3-Nov-17 @ 4:26 PM
mrsdannyjones - Your Question:
Please help me! My best friend Sarah has a contact order with her childrens father Daniel (biological father of Leo aged 5 and Harry aged 6, but raised my cousins daughter Emily aged 7 from birth, although he's not her biological father.) In court Sarah did not contest to Daniel still seeing Emily as Emily believes Daniel is her father. The contact order states that the children see their dad every fortnight from Friday to Sunday. Sarah has received nothing but verbal, mental and emotional abuse from this man since they separated last year and he uses the children as weapons to hurt her. She received a message from him today stating that he isn't bringing the children home as he's spoken to social services and they've advised him to keep them as he has concerns for their safety at home. Sarah has been told she must contact social services in the morning to see what happens now. She is a wonderful mother and the children are NOT in danger with her in anyway shape or form. I am qualified in childcare and safeguarding, I would 100% say so if I thought they were being abused or neglected, but they're not. They could not be more loved by their mother. In fact, Sarab has concerns they are being emotionally and verbally abused at their fathers house. She has made reports of this to social services, the police and children's safeguarding team who all say there's nothing they can do as there's no evidence. She is now out of her mind with worry, thinking she'll have to go to court to get her children back, she is even frightened of the thought of never seeing her beloved babies again. Is there anything she can do to prove he is making false allegations to social services to take her children away? Someone please help I'm desperate to help her, her kids are her world and I'm afraid she won't cope if this carries on.(All names have been changed.)

Our Response:
If the father has parental responsibility of your friend's children, there is little your friend can do apart from to apply directly to court, please see link here.
SeparatedDads - 30-Oct-17 @ 11:01 AM
Please help me! My best friend Sarah has a contact order with her childrens father Daniel (biological father of Leo aged 5 and Harry aged 6, but raised my cousins daughter Emily aged 7 from birth, although he's not her biological father.) In court Sarah did not contest to Daniel still seeing Emily as Emily believes Daniel is her father. The contact order states that the children see their dad every fortnight from Friday to Sunday. Sarah has received nothing but verbal, mental and emotional abuse from this man since they separated last year and he uses the children as weapons to hurt her. She received a message from him today stating that he isn't bringing the children home as he's spoken to social services and they've advised him to keep them as he has concerns for their safety at home. Sarah has been told she must contact social services in the morning to see what happens now. She is a wonderful mother and the children are NOT in danger with her in anyway shape or form. I am qualified in childcare and safeguarding, I would 100% say so if I thought they were being abused or neglected, but they're not. They could not be more loved by their mother. In fact, Sarab has concerns they are being emotionally and verbally abused at their fathers house. She has made reports of this to social services, the police and children's safeguarding team who all say there's nothing they can do as there's no evidence. She is now out of her mind with worry, thinking she'll have to go to court to get her children back, she is even frightened of the thought of never seeing her beloved babies again. Is there anything she can do to prove he is making false allegations to social services to take her children away? Someone please help I'm desperate to help her, her kids are her world and I'm afraid she won't cope if this carries on. (All names have been changed.)
mrsdannyjones - 29-Oct-17 @ 7:12 PM
Hello I'm not sure if this is the right place but here goes. So in a nutshell. I have four kids with three different dads with two older kids sharing the same dad. In 1998 the aunt and uncle of my two older kids took my children and drug me through an ugly 2 1/2 year custody battle that I was almost finished with in 2000, and I was expecting to gain back full custody in may of 2000. That was cancelled never to be rescheduled because the father of my youngest child teamed up with the aunt and got a restraining order against me six weeks after the birth of our child. He told lies to everyone including my GAL. Subsequently my trial was discontinued and that would be the last time I ever saw my oldest daughter again. She was 8 at that time and now she is 25. My ex went on to lie to the courts and have me charged with domestic violence in 2000. I plead guilty under extreme circumstances to get out of jail. I was so scared and traumatized at this point I went on the run trying to change my identity and ended up with a whole lot more trouble, I have spent years trying to get past that stuff. In 2003 I learned of an open CPS case involving my son. This had to do with a broken leg Nicky suffered in his dads care. When I called to inquire about this case I was told that my baby had suffered other injuries which included red marks and bruises around his neck, I was then told that I need to get a lawyer and they could not tell me anymore. I insisted that they remove my child and even place him in foster care and investigate this man his father. I knew that Robert caused these injuries to our child and I was being told to get a lawyer. This made no sense to me as I had no idea what was happening. I decided to write a letter as internet was not quite available at that time yet. So I wrote a letter to the Ombudsman of child safety and explained my situation. Soon after I received a letter informing me that they investigated and was satisfied with the status of CPS. Still didn't know what was happening or where to turn next. Finally in 2004 while I was serving a sentence at Roberts house, I asked him for the truth and explanation as to what the situation was and why CPS was telling me to get a lawyer and finally I asked how did Nicky get red marks and bruises around his neck. Robert proceeded to tell me that he had lost his temper with Nicholas one morning and caused these injuries. He said because he was already being watched by CPS and didn't want to get in any trouble so he told CPS that I caused these injuries. So in 2015 I finally saw the actual court documents in which Robert actually in his writing acusing me of these atrocities. I decided to write a letter to CPS explaining all of this and they still denied being able to help me or even to look into this. Well I can't let this go first and foremost because my child who is now 17 years old is still being abused by this man. In fact my son said his dad kicked him in the ribs just a week ago. I had a ph
Pixi - 13-Sep-17 @ 10:57 PM
My now ex got 46 yrs cause of his 21 yr old daughter didn't get her way, she said he sexually abused her at age 3,5,12, supposedly, not sure cause story keep changing, his child support was done paid up ect.. So she wasn't getting no more money, her 21st b day came up she wanted $300, down payment for her house n a bottle of something well we didn't have it of course so she started these accusations, and while we were living the life cause he worked made good money we had allot but we couldn't afford that , some time went by n then her desperate preggo with twins friend of hers started saying something , supposedly he only met a handful of times , note some of these accusations could not have possibly happened due to so many people around at an event n just not possible cause I'm sure someone would have said something then..ex wife got involved ect it was a mess. Attorney said if you gave me more money I woulda helped cause I knew you were innocent .. He's been in prison for 5 yrs now and I'm hearing nothing can be done any more..... Cause of what attorney did and supposedly he had another attorney on it but he did nothing either, was lots of polical stuff going on to and they made sure it was every where to make them look good
Rose - 15-Aug-17 @ 9:21 PM
b23 - Your Question:
Has anyone got any advise for me please? my 6 year olds mother accused my friend of sexual abuse on my son,and said that I was aware of it going on(total rubbish).ss told me no contact till my son had been interviewed by police(3 months now).hes been interviewed and nfa.hes told his nanna"if I hadnt said what mum told me to say I would be with dad now".2 weeks ago started seeing him at contact centre for 1 hour 3 min a week.this cant be right can it when she has made false aligations and my son lived with me and didnt even want to speak to his mum after school or before bed time.what can I do regarding this as she has caused so much sadness due to her making false aligations?

Our Response:
I can only suggest you seek legal advice regarding this matter. Until the allegations have been properly investigated there is little you can do. As you can imagine SS's hands are tied, as any allegation needs to be taken seriously and looked into regardless. With regards to your ex's allegations, trying to prove they are false isn't easy. A solicitor will advise you whether you have a case to answer.
SeparatedDads - 30-May-17 @ 10:02 AM
has anyone got any advise for me please? my 6 year olds mother accused my friend of sexual abuse on my son,and said that i was aware of it going on(total rubbish).ss told me no contact till my son had been interviewed by police(3 months now).hes been interviewed and nfa.hes told his nanna"if i hadnt said what mum told me to say i would be with dad now".2 weeks ago started seeing him at contact centre for 1 hour 3 min a week.this cant be right can it when she has made false aligations and my son lived with me and didnt even want to speak to his mum after school or before bed time.what can i do regarding this as she has caused so much sadness due to her making false aligations?
b23 - 29-May-17 @ 6:21 AM
My wife moved away into a home for domestically abused women . She only did this ,as she was just fed up and wanted to move away . Because she had to be a victim of abuse to stay in this charity home, she had to have adomestic abuse story .So she made up a story that I have been inappropriately touching my children. The staff from the home referred her to social services where she repeated her lies . Many months later she realised her mistake andtold social services her allegations were false and she had lied . I have read on the Internet that these allegations stay on file. Will I be able to see my children normally again without intervention fromsocial services.
J - 12-May-17 @ 6:12 PM
Hi Dear Please help I am in bad situation my ex took my three children and complain to the police and social services that I been hit her 5 times and threatenedher too the women refugee people took her somewhere. She changed her phone number only I had her email to access her but she never replied for 2 weeks she wenthe in relationship after 7 days she left the house it shows on her facebook page the date she start relationship. After 2 week I email her about kids she replied the children are ok after keep begging her to bring the kids she brought the children in train station for 1 hour she said she arrange to see them again next week I agreed with her but she didn't reply when I asked her which day I can see the kids I was so worry and sad because didn't know her address and telephone number two weeks after last meeting she text from a new number says I missue you I didn't know that was her I replied who is this she saI'd it's me it was 4 am then she stopped contact again after two day she arrange meeting again at KFC to see the kids and again she said I can arrange to see the kids every Thursday I agreed with her when she left I emailed her thanks for bringing the kids she didn't replied after 2 days she said don't email me don't text even she was revealed her number then she said you can't see your kids because there was domestic violence. I never been involved with police or social services at all but I dont have enough money to pay for solicitors I can sell my car to pay but I need advice am I still get access in court or just waste my money please advice anyone been in this situation all my friends says court not allow you access because of domestic violence allegations they blieve her by only report it is it through. She got money from me for her new house deposit and again £400 she said I can see them when she got the money she stopped and said you can't see them because there was domestic violence in our relationship how come she went with someone else within a week and accussed me of all allegations of I been attacked her in front of kids five times? Please what is my chance of acces to see the kids if I apply to court never been arrest it by police? Please share your experience thanks
Samimm - 17-Apr-17 @ 10:02 PM
Trace - Your Question:
Hi my daughter has been fighting for almost two years to get her son back from out of foster care he was 9 weeks old when he was taken to hospital very ill doctors said it was a brain bleed and had a rib fracture ( shaken baby) prior to this she took him numerous occasions because of projectile vomiting for them to say she's over feeding him. the farther after 18 months and after judgment he came forward to say he fell with him( nothing was done about this) my daughter has had a polygraph test done that said she didn't hurt him yet they are still trying to get him adopted out. Even though farther has changed story over and over again my daughter's has remained the same. How can the social services justify this ???? They treated farther better than my daughter and it kills me knowing what she's going through its so hard I Love my grandson dearly I don't want him to be adopted.

Our Response:
I'm afraid we cannot comment on a question such as this because of the complex issues involved. Your daughter's only recourse would be to seek legal advice about whether her case can be heard through the courts.
SeparatedDads - 24-Mar-17 @ 12:50 PM
Hi my daughter has been fighting for almost two years to get her son back from out of foster care he was 9 weeks old when he was taken to hospital very ill doctors said it was a brain bleed and had a rib fracture ( shaken baby) prior to this she took him numerous occasions because of projectile vomiting for them to say she's over feeding him.. the farther after 18 months and after judgment he came forward to say he fell with him( nothing was done about this) my daughter has had a polygraph test done that said she didn't hurt him yet they are still trying to get him adopted out . Even though farther has changed story over and over again my daughter's has remained the same. How can the social services justify this ???? They treated farther better than my daughter and it kills me knowing what she's going through its so hard I Love my grandson dearly I don't want him to be adopted.
Trace - 24-Mar-17 @ 1:33 AM
Parwani - Your Question:
Please help me my partner accused me I was threatened her and shout and smack the kids and I was beating her always but the women refugees people tooke her away from me so I don't know there place however she said. But now I spoke to the solicitor to have child contact arrangements with the kids but the social said to my solicitor they should write to them. please any help or advice may I see my kids or what will be the next step we have not history of abuse just she made I abused her and threatened her but I wonder if I can see my kids or not?

Our Response:
I cannot give you any more advice than your solicitor already has. You have no legal right to see your kids if your ex has refused access over a domestic incident - as advised by your solicitor, you would have to apply to court. We cannot predict what a court will decide, it will always decide on what it thinks is in the best interests of your children.
SeparatedDads - 2-Mar-17 @ 12:16 PM
Please help me my partner accused me I was threatened her and shout and smack the kids and I was beating her always but the women refugees people tooke her away from me so I don't know there place however she said . But now I spoke to the solicitor to have child contact arrangements with the kids but the social said to my solicitor they should write to them. please any help or advice may I see my kids or what will be the next step we have not history of abuse just she made I abused her and threatened her but I wonder if I can see my kids or not?
Parwani - 1-Mar-17 @ 1:36 PM
I'm separated from my wife I have 3 children my 5 year old has accused me of hurting her social have given the kids to their mother and I got arrested for child cruelty last night she has some bruises but I have not done these I wouldn't hurt any of my kids I've not been charged yet I'm petrified as they trying to through book at me and I know I've done nothing wrong
Berto - 26-Nov-16 @ 2:19 PM
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