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Staying Involved in a Child's School Activities

By: Chris Nickson - Updated: 19 Jun 2017 | comments*Discuss
Single Dads Fathers Parent Parenting

As a separated or divorced parent, it’s not always easy to keep up on what’s happening with your children at school. At the best of times kids don’t communicate much about school with their parents, no matter how good you are at parenting. Asking how school was often elicits something like “Good” as a response, which isn’t especially helpful and getting more information can be like pulling teeth.

As a single dad it’s even harder, since you want to make the most of the time with your kids rather than pestering them for information about school – although, of course, you want to know if there’s a problem there, so you can do something about it.

But even as a single dad you can be more involved if you choose to be, and as a good father, you will certainly want to be. In many ways it becomes a parenting issue, as school is the main component of childhood these days.

The Responsibilities of Schools

If you have Parental Responsibility for your children as defined under the Children Act 1989, you have a Right To Be Kept Informed About Your Child, and this includes taking part in all the decisions regarding their education. That’s not just good parenting, it’s the law.

You have the right as a parent to receive information from the school, including attendance and performance reports on your children, to give permission as the father for trips and other activities, to participate in school activities and to be told about any meetings at school that involve your children.

If your ex hasn’t given information about you to the school, you can contact them directly, after which they have to provide you with information. In the case of school trips, permission has to come from both parents, and if only one gives permission, to stop possible conflicts, the child won’t be allowed to go. The school is also obliged to inform both parents when the child is ill or has medical issues.

How To Be More Involved As a Single Dad

If you’re on good terms with your ex, you could attend school meetings or parent’s evenings in her place, to talk to the teachers and get a good assessment of how your children are doing. You could also attend things like sports day or pick up the kids from school sometimes, which will be a perfect chance to talk to them about what’s been happening while it’s still fresh in their minds.

However, if you and your ex are not on good terms, it becomes a little more difficult. Talking to your kids about school is good when you’re a single dad, but even if they expand their answers, you’re only going to get one side of the story.

Talk to the school and see if you can arrange meetings with the teachers to discuss the progress of your kids. It shows that you’re involved as a parent – as you undoubtedly are. But although fathers have traditionally been less involved in the education of children, leaving it to the wives and partners, a single father has to be more pro-active.

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[Add a Comment]
charlie - Your Question:
Hello,I am separated from my partner and have PR for my daughter. Can her school stop me from attending school functions/meet my daughter at school?

Our Response:
The Government's guidance on Parental Responsibility states that both school and local authority staff must treat all parents equally, unless there is a court order limiting an individual's exercise of parental responsibility. You can see the gov.uk information here regarding the stance your daughter's school should take.
SeparatedDads - 20-Jun-17 @ 1:40 PM
Hello, I am separated from my partner and have PR for my daughter. Can her school stop me from attending school functions/meet my daughter at school?
charlie - 19-Jun-17 @ 12:31 PM
I think the parent should come but not bring new partner and her kid
Jo - 18-Jan-17 @ 8:09 AM
hi im a seperated father of 2 kids, i was only put on the birth certificate for 1 my kids, ive managed to get the school to send me reports n so on but for my son who im not on the birth certificute the school wont let me i have proof with dna that im father to both should this be enough to get reports? ive got aspergers which causes me trouble and as unemployed i cant take to court, what should i do, im a father crying for help
ballbags - 2-Sep-14 @ 5:56 PM
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